


The Ice Cream Test

by nishiki



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bonding, Brainwashing, Butch is a good guy, Developing Friendships, Edward is an idiot, Edward is in love with Oswald, Experiments, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Forgiveness, Homeless Oswald, Hugo Strange being creepy, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jealous Ed Nygma, Jealousy, Jim being an actual friend to Oswald, Jimwald friendship, Lee lends a helping hand, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Minor Jim Gordon/Leslie Thompkins, New Beginnings, Oswald actually learned his lesson, Oswald finds his father, Oswald has a crush on Jim, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Brainwashing, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Torture, Porn With Plot, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Ed Nygma, Post-Arkham Asylum, Post-Arkham Oswald, Protective Jim, Psychological Torture, Reconciliation, Redemption, Revenge, Sane Oswald, Slow Build, The Van Dahls get what they deserve, Torture, Warnings May Change, and looses him too, gobblepot friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-04-18 10:51:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 87,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14211567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nishiki/pseuds/nishiki
Summary: After his release from Arkham thanks to Jim Gordon intervening, Oswald finds himself alone in this big city. He has no friends left to help him, no home of his own, no money to his name and not even the darker part of his personality to help him maneuver these stormy seas. In this desperate situation, Oswald finds help at unexpected places.-Set after Season 2 Episode 14 - Jim gets Oswald out of Arkham and now sane Oswald has to find his place in the city. Meanwhile, Nygma is a jealous bitch.





	1. Prolog

**Gotham - Arkham Asylum**

If there was one place in this city that Jim Gordon actually hated to visit, it was the old Arkham Asylum. After all this in-fighting between Maroni and Don Falcone in the last year, Arkham had been re-opened and re-populated with Gotham’s most vulnerable, most desperate and most depraved. At least, he thought, as he walked these corridors, they could have repainted these walls since Arkham had reopened its doors. Still, despite how daunting everything looked, despite how claustrophobic these hallways made him feel, Arkham also held fond memories for him. After all, he had met Lee as he had been working in this facility for a while a year ago and this was probably one of the best things that could ever have happened to him, especially after this whole debacle with Barbara. Hell, looking back on the events of last year, he was surprised that Lee had decided to stay with him, despite all the craziness in his life, despite an ex-fiance who had tried to murder her in a fit of rage. Lee truly was a keeper - and she knew that too, which made arguing with her not always too easy.

This was exactly what led him to Arkham today once more. Only a few weeks ago, he had been to Arkham as they had been dealing with Victor Fries and his unfortunate wife, Nora. Lee had been adamant to accompany Victor’s dying wife as they had brought her to Arkham in hopes of capturing her husband in using her as bait for him. Of course, Victor had immediately seen right through this little spiel of theirs. Needless to say though, their plan had worked out at least in this regard as Mr. Fries had been all too willing to walk right into this facility. However,  both Mr. and Mrs. Fries had ended up dead at the end of the day, which to him had been like a punch in the guts.

He would have hoped not to need to come to this facility anytime soon again after this debacle with the Fries, and yet Jim found himself walking these endless maze-like corridors again by the request of none other than Hugo Strange himself. They only had little time to talk during Jim’s last visit to the hospital and during the time that he had worked in Arkham, he had never met the Professor in person. Back then he had gained a whole new sense of respect for the guards and nurses of Arkham. Whenever he would catch himself thinking that working for the GCPD was like working in a madhouse, he would fondly think back to his time actually working inside of a madhouse.

Jim felt a little uneasy as he followed the guards, two tall and broad-shouldered young men, through the building. Even as he had been working here, the cries and screams of the patients had never left him at night when he had been able to retreat into the safety of his own four walls and it was no different now. Of course, he had been surprised as he had received the call from the Professor asking him to drop by, but even more, he had been surprised by the reason for his summoning to the asylum.

He met Strange as soon as the guards delivered him to the fourth-floor corridor, stepping out of the old-timey elevator. If the floor level was an indicator of the sanity of the patients on a particular floor, with the first floor above ground level being the lowest and the sixth floor the highest, then Jim was currently surrounded by at least not the most dangerous individuals of this hospital. Arkham had not always been a place exclusively for the criminally insane and even as it had been reopened after fifteen years, the plan had been to make it a place for the least fortunate of Gotham. He knew, after his time working in here, that the most depraved and dangerous of the inmates were housed on the top floor of the main building, securely locked inside their padded cells, never to see the light of day ever again. On this floor, he assumed, were those who were still deemed able to have a chance of healing.

Strange and his assistant, Miss Peabody, waited for him just outside the elevator and while Strange wore that overbearing smile on his face, that always made him feel as if he was about to get evaluated himself would he just smile the wrong way in return, Peabody remained stiff as a statue beside her boss, her face an unreadable mask of something almost akin to disgust, as if she was staring down a spider on her freshly painted wall. He greeted both with a quick handshake and a few of the usual set phrases before he could finally ask the good Professor about the reason for his visit to Arkham Asylum, although, deep down in his stomach, he had a hunch.

»Detective Gordon.« Strange smiled at him before he gracefully gestured down the hallway, thus ushering Jim to follow as he started moving. »Always a man eager to get to the meat of any given situation straight away. I can admire this. It's something we have in common, I would assume.«

»Do we?« He didn't mean to sound in any way condescending or rude, but the way Peabody looked at him told him that this was exactly how he sounded.

»Oh yes, I believe we do. See, the same way that it's your desire to solve any given crime you stumble upon to unmask and arrest the perpetrator of said crime, it is my strong desire to always get to the bottom of my patients true problems - the real reason why they became sick in the first place, so to say. In this way, I would believe, we are both detectives, aren't we, Detective Gordon?«

He was wise enough not to make another rude comment, so instead, he nodded in agreement with a small toothy grin of which Lee always claimed it would look as if he was constipated. »I called you here, Detective, because I thought you might want to see the level of progress we made with Mr. Cobblepot for yourself.« Strange hummed finally, as he led Jim through the hallways, accompanied by a guard and his right-hand woman, Miss Peabody. »We, here in Arkham Asylum, are always happy to work with the GCPD and I thought that our success with Mr. Cobblepot would be something you would find comforting to have witnessed for future collaborations.«

Now that had peaked his interest at last. Progress? With Oswald? He didn't want to get his hopes up too high, but if Strange had managed to get Oswald to behave around others without threatening to murder them every other sentence, that would have been great progress already. Still, he had never been quite able to shake off his last meeting with the Penguin here in Arkham. His eyes had haunted him for a long time afterward. »What kind of progress did you make with Oswald?«

»See, when Mr. Cobblepot first arrived at this facility, he was a very aggressive young man.« Jim had almost snorted. To him, that sounded very much like a horrible understatement. To him, a young man who not only beat a man half to death with a baseball bat only to then shove an umbrella down said man’s throat after his death to make a very clear statement to the public, was more than a bit aggressive - But maybe that was just him. »He had troubles adjusting to his new life, troubles even adjusting to his therapy or the sheer thought of being rehabilitated. He was certain that the entire world was out to punish him for his deeds, not to mention his thoughts of grandeur that made him so dangerous in the first place - clearly instilled by his very unhealthy relationship to his mother. We see this often in children like him who grew up alone with only one parent, mostly their mothers. On his very first day, he held a speech from the top of a cafeteria table, for example.«

»Yeah … That sounds like Oswald.«

»From this moment onwards, I promised myself to rehabilitate this young man and make him a functioning member of society again because if we would be able to cure someone like Oswald Cobblepot, we would be able to cure absolutely every person in the future who would set foot into this building. And that should be the goal, shouldn't it? For the longest time, Arkham has been a place where Gotham’s most vulnerable souls have been stored away to be forgotten by the public with no attempts made to actually heal them. When I took over, I promised myself that this would change and that every single patient in this facility would be able to start a new life at some point. I am confident to say that we achieved just that with Mr. Cobblepot.«

»And why is it that you called me of all people to show Oswald’s progress to? Wouldn't have been Captain Barnes a lot more suitable choice for that?« They were passing an endless row of doors that all looked the same, some open, some closed, behind most of them only the cells of the inmates or the occasional broom closet. The only people ever walking past them in the opposite direction were nurses and guards.

»It came to my attention that you and Mr. Cobblepot have history together.« It didn't sound good the way Professor Strange said it but he decided to ignore it for now. »He seemed to have reacted very strongly to your presence in Arkham a few weeks ago during the case of the unfortunate Mr. and Mrs. Fries. The guards told me that he asked you for help even, when you met him outside as he was on his way to his treatment.«

»That is true, yes.« Jim sighed. »He claimed that you would be torturing him. Of course, I didn't believe that. Oswald always had a thing for being a little overdramatic. But I have to say, I am thrilled to see if you actually managed to change Oswald with your methods of therapy. I know Oswald for a little over a year now and if anyone would have ever told me that there was a chance that Oswald would be able to change and become a functioning member of society, as you phrased it, I would have laughed.«

»I take it that you are of the impression that Mr. Cobblepot’s level of insanity is so high that you doubt a rehabilitation is impossible?« It was possibly the first time, that he felt Strange’s analyzing stare on his face again since they started walking, as if he was searching for even a hint of something that Jim might have buried deep down inside about him and Oswald.

»That's the thing, Professor, I never quite thought of him as insane at all. He is troubled, sure, but who isn't? He had to deal with a lot this past year, the death of his mother in his own arms being just one of the more traumatic instances. And surely he has anger issues, but insane? No. No, I never thought he was insane.« Jim caught the way Strange looked at him through his red glasses with one raised eyebrow and quickly tried to add to his story. »Listen, I don't know much about these things. But I always thought that Oswald was very intelligent, bordering on brilliant, perhaps. Some say that there is a very fine line between genius and madness, right?«

»If I wouldn't know any better, I would almost say you would admire Mr. Cobblepot.«

»I can give credit where credit is due and Oswald is certainly many things but being an idiot is not on the list.«

»That I would agree on, Detective Gordon.« They had reached the cafeteria which also doubled as the rec room for the inmates of this particular floor and already he could see Oswald how he was shuffling slowly with his tray through the door, aiming for one of the last free spots at a table where one quite brawny looking man sat. »Ah, just in time.« Strange hummed and made Jim look at him in confusion before his eyes darted back to Oswald as they reached the door to the rec room. Oswald looked terrible, worse than he did when he had last seen him in here. He remembered walking into Arkham with Harvey as this whole Victor Fries debacle had just begun and how they had witnessed Oswald walking in a circle around the other patients, muttering the word _duck_ over and over again, seemingly on drugs. And he remembered the second time even more vividly as the young man had claimed to be tortured by Strange, his eyes haunted and darkly rimmed by lack of sleep. Well, looking at him now he _looked_ tortured. He was thinner than before, haggard even. His thick black hair that he usually took such good care of and always made the effort to style in some weird birdlike fashion, was now only a tousled shaggy mess standing in every direction and hanging in his eyes. He even looked paler than normally, but that could be attributed to the loud neon light and the faded colors of his striped uniform. He had dark circles under his eyes as if he had not slept in days and a nervous twitch to his mouth and the silent sweet smile that was plastered on his face so unnaturally.

He didn't even look like the Oswald Jim knew anymore but like a shadow of his former self. Of course, change was a good thing in Oswald’s case, but Jim still couldn't deny the lump in his throat as he watched Oswald sit down carefully.

»Just in time for what?« He found himself asking as they took position right outside the gate of the rec room and suddenly he felt like a visitor in a zoo who was watching a lamb being thrown into the lion's den.

»We call it the ice cream test.«

 

**-End of Chapter 1-**


	2. Chapter 2

**Gotham - Arkham Asylum**

His days in Arkham always began the same way and today was no exception to that rule either. Oswald was shaken awake by the sound of the doors being unlocked automatically from the control center down the hall accompanied by the sounds of the other patients slowly leaving their cells and shuffling towards the rec room to have breakfast. Oswald couldn't yet get himself to move although he knew he should and, of course, he wanted to. Breakfast was the most important meal of the day, after all. Yet, as he swung his legs over the edge of his bed to get up, he found himself on the floor in a matter of mere seconds, his legs unable to cooperate, maybe unwilling, who was he to decide upon that?

He blinked slowly and every time he closed his eyes it was as if he was losing entire hours. He heard the doors closing after a while, locking him back inside his room without giving him the chance to grab a bite to eat first, then opening again one or two blinks later. Lunchtime. He had missed his group therapy session. Surely Miss Peabody would be furious. He didn't want to go to special therapy again like he did last night. He didn't want to misbehave or make her angry, after all, she was here to help him and she did mean no harm to him as long as he behaved properly, which was not too much to ask anyway. Surely, she would understand that he didn't mean to misbehave. Lunchtime came and went and Oswald remained on the floor of his cell surrounded by the pictures he had drawn throughout the last few weeks. Miss Peabody had been friendly enough to allow him to put them on his walls.

He didn't quite know why he had drawn so many penguins, but he liked them, although now looking at them, they reminded him on his past self and that hurt him quite a lot more than he thought it would. He didn't want to go to special therapy again. He really had enough of it. Although … If Professor Strange would want him to do it again and thought that it would be best for his rehabilitation, he would, of course, attend them. Professor Strange always knew what was best for him even when he couldn't quite see it at the moment himself, even when it meant pain to get better at first, he would deal with it. Pain meant getting better. Pain was a good thing at least at the moment, at least here inside of Arkham.

Only when dinner time rolled around someone came to look for him and to pick him off the floor. They did not lose a word about the reason why he had been lying on the ground like this in the first place, almost as if they had expected nothing else to find as they had finally come to look for him inside his cell. Maybe it had been expected. Maybe he had been worrying for no reason. Of course, he had. Surely, everything went as it should. Surely, everything was as it should be and he had never been in any real danger. It was his own fault that he had been lying on the cold ground for such a long time. He shouldn't have tried to get up so it was his own fault. He was picked up by one of the nurses and slowly dragged out of his room and into the hallway. Only as his legs started working on their own again was he able to stumble forwards with the other patients to wait in line for dinner. He was not exactly looking forward to the drugs after dinner, but he knew that they were necessary so that he would get better. He understood that, though they made him loopy and drowsy, it was only for his own best so that he would be able to sleep properly. Only in a relaxed body could live a sound mind, that was what Professor Strange always liked to say to him during their sessions in his office. Surely, he was right.

Walking through the corridors towards the rec room and the food counter, he could steal a glimpse of the outside world through one of the larger windows that were overlooking Gotham like the huge eyes of a giant. He didn't quite know for how long he was in Arkham now, but he could see that the first bit of green was starting to creep back into the trees and bushes outside in the park behind Arkham. Oh, he couldn't wait to be allowed outside in the park! Professor Strange had promised him it wouldn't be long until he would be stable enough to be allowed to go for a walk or work in the gardens with some of the other, more stable, patients. He fleetingly greeted the other nurses and patients with a pleasant smile plastered on his face on his way, before he stopped at the end of the line in front of the food counter and waited patiently until it was his turn while some of the other patients were not so happy to wait. In the end, he ended up being the last in line after he had bid most of the other patients to go ahead. He was much more patient than most of them and thus he didn't have much of a problem with waiting in line a little longer. They would all get their food eventually anyway, right? No need to hurry. He was not very hungry anyway. He was not very hungry most of the time lately, almost as if his body had decided that he could go without food. This Professor Strange really was a healer!

He was a little confused as he realized that the nice lady behind the food counter had given him ice cream to his dinner. It was the first time ever since he walked into this facility and though he found joy in the fact, he was still surprised. His steps were a little lighter as he walked into the rec room with his tray. There were only three free spots around the rec room and he chose to sit with the big man he knew as Helzinger, although they had never talked to each other in person. He knew him from their group sessions and he was adamant to befriend him today. He had ice cream after all, so what could go wrong? Everything seemed possible today.

However, as he sat down with Helzinger, his luck seemed to die off right away. He smiled shyly at Helzinger as the other man looked at him first in surprise about the fact that Oswald had decided to sit with him, and then quickly dropped his gaze on the tray in front of Oswald. »Icecream. Why do you have ice cream?«

»I'm sorry, I don't know.« He shrugged his shoulders slightly with a smile. »It's unusual, isn't it?« Thinking about it, he had never seen any patient getting ice cream to any meal so this could not be about behavior, right? After all, the other patients all behaved exceptionally well most of the time! He could see from the shift in the expression on Helzinger’s face that not only was it unusual, but also was it highly agitating to him. His breathing seemed to quicken and Oswald started to feel increasingly more nervous. »My name’s Oswald. What's yours?« It was a sorry attempt of defusing the bomb that was this very surprising and uncomfortable situation.

»I don't have ice cream.« Helzinger breathed through gritted teeth. He actually looked quite scary the way he was balling his meaty fists around his plastic cutlery and Oswald started to become increasingly aware of how big he actually was. »Why do you have ice cream?« Suddenly, he felt like a deer in the headlights of a truck. He didn't know what to do or how to react.

»Please…« He muttered and pushed his tray towards the man in front of him. »By all means, you can-«

»I don't have ice cream!« Helzinger shouted, every word accentuated by him slamming his meaty fists on the metal table as he rose to his feet, towering over Oswald like a mountain while Oswald had no other choice but to shrink back in his chair instead. »Why do you have ice cream?« He screamed with spit flying from his mouth. Oswald started trembling as he shrunk back from Helzinger in his seat as the burly man stepped around the table and towards him.

»I apologize, Sir!« He quickly muttered but Helzinger was already on his side of the table. »I don't know what-«

Before he knew it, Helzinger had grabbed him by the wrists, lifted him off his feet with as much ease as if Oswald would weigh nothing at all before he slammed him on the ground and started shaking him, still screaming about ice cream like a madman. There was nothing Oswald could do about it as Helzinger threw him to the ground so heavily that it pushed all air out of his lungs, except whimper in fear of the big guy. The guards weren't coming to take Helzinger away and the other inmates shrunk away in fear as Helzinger suddenly started to kick him only getting more and more agitated by his lack of ice cream by the minute. Oswald wasn't quick enough to shield his face and so the first kick hit him square in the face before he could box his head with his arms and try to curl in on himself. He didn't know how long it took the guards to storm in and pull Helzinger away from him while he remained lying trembling on the ground. His nose was bleeding from this one particularly heavy kick to his face, probably broken. He was wheezing in pain, his ribs aching, his stomach screaming at him. He was unable to get up from the ground, too afraid that he would get beaten down right away again, before he suddenly felt hands on him.

»Oswald?« He knew that voice! As he slowly lowered his arms from his head and started blinking against the loud neon light of the rec room, an all too familiar face hovered above him. Around them, the world was a chaotic mess of screaming patients and Helzinger’s shouts echoing down the hallway. »Oswald, are you alright? Can you stand?«

»Jim?« His voice was thin as he uttered the name and first he wasn't sure if he had really said it out loud or if Jim had heard him even above the cacophony of screams and crying around them, but the Detective slowly grabbed him by the arms and helped him to get back to his feet, the ghost of fury and anger still visible on his face as Jim suddenly turned his face to look over his shoulder and towards the gate to the rec room. He found Professor Strange and his assistant Miss Peabody standing there on the other side of the open gate, watching his every move carefully. Oswald just responded with a soft little smile in their direction even though his head was swimming and he still had troubles to even wrap his head around what had just happened. He was beyond confused why Helzinger had reacted this aggressively to his ice cream, although he couldn't deny that he felt sorry for the big man. It was not right to treat patients differently from each other. It was not right to give one patient ice cream and not giving ice cream to the other patients as well. »What are you doing here, my friend?«

»Are you okay, Oswald? Any broken bones?« It was odd how Jim was looking him over as he held onto Oswald so firmly. He could feel how the blood was running down his face from his nose and his split lips but he shook his head quickly right away.

»I’m okay!« He replied with a smile. »I’m happy to see you here, Jim! What brought you to this place? Did you come to visit me? Oh … I … I would offer you a drink … but I'm afraid I don't have anything I could offer you right now.«

»What was this about right now?« Always the detective, always eager to help the people around him. That was what he liked so much about Jim Gordon. Despite their differences, he was still eager to help Oswald now in this situation.

»Oh … this … I don't know. Helzinger is usually very nice, you see? I think he was a bit sad that he didn't get any ice cream. Understandable. It's unfair to treat patients so differently.« Oswald replied quickly and began dusting off his uniform to his best ability. He was aching all over but he was too glad to see a friendly face to show it. Well, he had had worse beatings in his life. Surely, Jim was here for a damn good reason and surely, he needed help with anything. »Are you here for a case? I would be honored to help you, my good friend.«

»No … I'm not here for a case, Oswald.« Jim replied quietly, his eyes confused as he stared at him. »I’m here because Strange asked me to come see your progress.«

»Oh!« He smiled as brightly as he could despite his aching jaw. »How nice of you to come all the way out here just for me, Jim! I am flattered. I'm sorry you had to see that. I can assure you that Helzinger usually is not like this.« He could almost not believe his luck that Jim Gordon, despite how much he had to deal with on a daily basis, really came to see him. He was such a good friend.

Jim looked again at the gate, his eyes suddenly very small and his eyebrows furrowed in anger as he looked at Strange, before he turned back to Oswald and patted his shoulder. »I think you made great progress, Oswald. Don't worry about Helzinger, I'm sure he didn't mean it. How do they treat you here?«

»Oh, good, good!« Oswald smiled. »Everyone is very nice to me in here. I really like to play with the other patients or to attend art therapy. And Professor Strange really does his best to make me a better person. He said that I might be allowed to work in the gardens soon too, with the other patients. Isn't that great?«

»It is, Oswald.« Jim hummed but his expression seemed worried to Oswald, though he couldn't quite place why he might be worried. Everything was fine, wasn’t it? »Come, Oswald, we need to go patch you up, right? Helzinger did quite a number on your face. I think your nose might be broken.« Oswald nodded quickly and instinctively places his right hand on his nose before he followed the detective to the gate. Forgotten was his tray with food and the melting ice cream and he shuffled after him and through the gate. »Hey, you!« Jim turned to one of the nurses. »Take Oswald to the infirmary to have him patched up, I’m coming shortly. But first I have to talk to Professor Strange.« Oswald just followed the Nurse, Tommy, after what Jim had said, though he was nervous for a second what Professor Strange might think of this whole situation. He could only hope that he was not thinking that Oswald had done something bad to provoke Helzinger into flipping out on him like that.

He had to wait quite a bit after Tommy had dumped him inside the infirmary until one of the doctors would be ready to patch him up. He hated nothing more than to cause trouble for anyone around him and surely he was doing just that right now. The doctor took his time to come to him and take a look at his face. In the end, he just cleaned the blood off his face and shoved two balls of cotton in his nostrils to collect the blood that was pouring out of them. »There you go, all better now.« His nose still hurt very badly but surely Doctor Miller did everything he could do for him. Still … if his nose was broken, shouldn't he do anything about that?

Oswald almost didn't dare to ask and yet he did it as the doctor turned his back to him. »Is it broken?«

»It is. Not that it would make any difference, right?« He snorted as he glanced over his shoulder at Oswald after he had turned away from his bed to scribble something on his notepad. »You are not winning any model contests in the future anyway. It's gonna heal but I prescribe you something for the pain.«

»Y-Yes … Right.« Oswald quickly replied with a nervous little smile as he dropped his gaze to his knees just as the door to the infirmary opened again with none other than James Gordon walking inside to join him and Doctor Miller. »Oh, Jim!« He smiled and noticed the look Jim exchanged with Doctor Miller. He still seemed angry. »Did you have a nice talk with Professor Strange?«

»I did, Oswald.« Jim sighed and drove a hand through his hair before he shook his head in a way as if he would find amusement in a joke only he could hear and understand. »Oh, I’m going to regret this.« He sighed but before Oswald could ask, Jim stepped closer to the bed he was sitting on. »Come on, Oswald, you are free to leave this place now. I talked to Professor Strange and we both agreed that your rehabilitation was a success.«

»Are you sure?« The words were nothing more than a whisper as they left his mouth. There was no reason why Jim should lie to him and yet he could not believe what he was saying. Free? Him? But he had still so much to learn, still such a long way to go!

»There is no need for you to stay here any longer, Oswald. You are sane.«  

※※※※※※※

The moment Jim had seen how Oswald had been flung across the room by this brute Helzinger, he had known that he could not leave the former mobster and king of Gotham behind in this institution. No way. Whatever Strange had done to Oswald, he had made a lamb out of him and he was going to be slaughtered in here would he stay for much longer. Strange was not too happy about Jim’s fury, but in the end, he even seemed quite glad to agree to Jim’s demands of letting Oswald go, which made Jim suspect that this had been his plan all along. Knowing Strange, it probably was. To him, having Oswald Cobblepot released from Arkham was probably just another test if his therapy had succeeded. Release the bird into freedom and see if he can fly, so to say.

And the moment when he had decided that he would take Oswald with him, he knew he would regret it. Still, the Oswald he had found inside the rec room today, was certainly not the Oswald he had seen the last time he had been here. This was no longer the Penguin. This was no longer the criminal mastermind that had held Gotham in a tight embrace through the last year. This was just Oswald Cobblepot, and not even him, perhaps. It was as if an important part of Oswald’s personality had been stripped away from the young man, almost as if he wouldn't be able to even feel the slightest bit of anger any longer. The old Oswald would not have cowered in fear, not even from someone as massive and big as Helzinger. He would have grabbed his plastic fork and stabbed the man in the leg and he would most certainly have not apologized for the fact that he got ice cream and Helzinger didn't.

It wasn't long after this, as Professor Strange handed Oswald his release papers with a smile and encouraging words directed at the still flabbergasted and a little confused Oswald. He was all too gently coaxed to go pack his belongings so that he would be able to leave right this evening without any further hiccups. And so, only one and a half hour after Jim had arrived at Arkham, he found himself sitting in his car next to none other than Oswald Cobblepot who proudly clutched his release papers and couldn't tear his eyes off of the certificate as if he still couldn't believe that he had actually gotten it, that he was actually free and, according to his certificate, completely sane.  

Well, he wasn't the only one who couldn't quite believe it that Oswald Cobblepot was free, that much was certain. How would the rest of this city react to the news that Oswald was free and roaming the streets of this city again? It would only be a matter of time until every criminal in town would be out to get his head as a trophy for whoever was in charge of the underworld right now. »So where to?« He turned to Oswald as Jim spurred his car into motion and gently coaxed it off the premises and through the huge iron gate before it closed behind him again.

Oswald suddenly seemed very flustered and it was this moment that he realized that he had a whole new problem on his hands. »I'm afraid it appears that I have hit a bit of a rough spot since the whole Galavan debacle. I believe that my club is now in the hands of someone else and … I would probably be best advised not to go back there anyway.«

»In other words, you are homeless at the moment.« Jim concluded and suppressed the sigh that was threatening to spill from his throat.

»I'm afraid that this is true.« If it was possible, he seemed even more flustered and ashamed than before.

»Okay, listen I take you in for tonight and we’ll see what we can do tomorrow.«

»I wouldn't wish to be of any inconvenience to you. I doubt that Miss Thompkins would be happy to have me around.« Of course, Oswald’s assessment of the situation was spot on as always. Oswald was a man who was easy to underestimate and Jim couldn't deny that he had made that mistake himself back in the day as he had first met this young man at Fish Mooney’s establishment. People never cared to look twice at him and thus they never noticed that Oswald was quite good at reading people and assessing any given situation. Jim would not make this mistake ever again, not after what he had witnessed in this warehouse one year ago as Oswald Cobblepot single-handedly started and pretty much ended a mob war with one cleverly placed sentence to incite Fish Mooney and make her turn against Maroni. It was hard to believe that this smiling young man who sat beside him now in the dirty looking clothes had he had worn before Arkham, was that same man.

»Don't worry about Lee. She can fix your nose. Just promise me not to murder us in our sleep.« Apparently, whatever Hugo Strange had done to him, had impaired his sense of humor too because Oswald looked positively horrified at his insinuation.

»I … I can assure you, I would never do something like that, old Friend. I couldn't harm anyone, even if I wanted to!« By now, after what he had seen today in Arkham, he believed him. There was no way that Oswald could mean harm to anyone in his current condition. He didn't even want to know what Strange had done to Penguin in the bowels of Arkham to achieve a result as this. Sure, it would be nice would his words hold true and he would be honestly able to rehabilitate, yes, even heal, the criminally insane and have them be a functioning part of society again, but to him, it sounded just too good to be true. Yet, Oswald seemed as sweet and gentle as a lamb. It was odd seeing him like this and knowing that this had to have been a part of his personality from the get-go which Strange had just made stronger now through therapy, strong enough to take over even. To think that this gentle person he had in his car really was a part of Oswald and not just some fake brainwashed personality of Strange’s creation was truly insane to him. Then again, no one was born a monster. Realizing that brought a whole set of new questions with it, questions he didn't wish to think about. He didn't wish to bother his mind with the question of what made Oswald into the man he had met back when he had first returned to Gotham. Maybe, had his life been any different, he would have been this gentle soul from the start and not the criminal he got to meet in the back alley behind Fish Mooney’s club over a year ago.

Well, they would never know what could have been. No way to turn back time and find out what potential Oswald might have had that had gotten destroyed over the years by this city and the circumstances. Still, seeing Oswald changed like this gave him a sense of hope for this city. If someone like Hugo Strange could change someone like Oswald Cobblepot that drastically, everyone had a chance of healing, of betterment. Even Gotham itself.

The drive back to his and Lee’s apartment went over swimmingly and without incident. Oswald seemed fascinated by everything around him as if he would see the city for the very first time and maybe, in some sick way, he did. His eyes were wide and full of glee the entire drive - and apparently, he really liked to sing because whenever there was a song on the radio he liked, he started singing along. Well, at least he really had a nice voice to go with it, so that was a plus. »I didn't know you could sing.« Jim hummed as he finally parked his car on the street he and Lee were living in but as he looked at his new companion, Oswald seemed flustered at the remark all of the sudden.

»I used to sing quite a lot with my mother. She was a big fan of the old classics and operas and loved to play the piano. We spend whole evenings singing duets at the piano when I grew up. Music was always important to us. Her father was a pianist and a singer back in Hungary … I never got to meet him, but he was the most important person in her life.« There was a moment as something akin to sadness crossed over Oswald’s face but it was gone too fast for Jim to take a proper look as it was quickly replaced by that sweet default smile of his again. »My mother wasn’t so good at singing, though she always said that I had my grandfather’s talent, so … I hope she was right.«

It really was odd to see Oswald this flustered when he was talking about anything. Usually, Oswald was the perfect picture of confidence no matter what he did. He knew what he was capable of, he knew how to handle things and even when not, he never showed any hint of uncertainty. This Oswald, right here, however, was the sole opposite of that. He was not per se shy or uncertain of himself, but quite modest in comparison to his old self and somehow this was quite the refreshing thing to experience. He found himself offering a small smile to Oswald in return and opened his door. »Come now. I still have to tell Lee and I think you could use a bath.« Not that he would stink but Arkham was not all that renowned for its hygiene when it came to the patients. Shower time was usually very restricted and Oswald looked as if he hadn't showered in at least a week, possibly two judging by the dirt under his fingernails and how greasy his messy black hair looked. It was honestly even weird to see him without his hair being styled in some artistic fashion, needless to say, that it had grown quite a bit longer these past months that he had spent in Arkham and now hung quite impressive in his blue eyes.

»Thank you, Jim, that is much too kind of you.« Oswald replied as he scrambled out of the car to follow him a bit further up the street and finally into the apartment complex he and Lee had their flat in. As Jim entered their apartment minutes later, he found that Lee was not yet home, but that she had left him a message on the answering machine telling him that she would be a little late but would get Chinese takeout for them on her way home. Well, at least then there would be enough for a third person as well because Lee, ever since she was pregnant, tended to order way too much for only two people and normally they would eat that stuff for days if it wouldn't get spoiled before they could finish it.

He was quick to lead Oswald into the bathroom and to grab him a set of spare pajamas that Barbara once bought for Jim and that he had not once worn, green and blue plaid flannel. Somehow he felt that this might be exactly Oswald’s cup of tea. When he came back to Oswald, the young man was already stripping out of his clothes, which were the same clothes he had been sent to Arkham in and had worn in the cell at the precinct after he had been caught by a couple of cops on the streets of Gotham. They could definitely use a wash. God knew how long Oswald had been wearing those before he had been caught. Oswald smiled gingerly at him as he noticed the set of pajamas and boxer shorts in Jim’s hands before the cop put them down on top of the laundry basket. He had switched the water on beforehand and by now the tub was already filled halfway.

»Hey, listen, Oswald, you can just give me your clothes when you’re ready and I go put them in the washing machine, okay? That way they are fresh when you want to put them on again tomorrow.«

»I really don't want to cause you further inconvenience, Jim.«

»You aren't. It's no big deal, really. We can't let you leave in dirty clothes, Oswald. So, yeah … Just put them in front of the door, okay?« Oswald nodded quickly as he already handed his jacket to Jim. He felt beyond weird leaving Oswald in his bathroom like this and stepping out knowing that soon he would hold Oswald’s dirty clothes in his hands to give them a wash. Hell, all of this was weird. All of this was strange. And yet, if that meant that Oswald Cobblepot was truly rehabilitated, he deserved a second chance and Jim would do what he could to make that second chance possible and as swimmingly as it could be. He would have to deal with more than enough crap already, so the least he could do was to wash his clothes, give him a bath, something to eat without being beaten up for having ice cream and a warm bed for the night.

It really took only two minutes after he left the bathroom for the door to open just a little and Oswald carefully placing his clothes on the ground as Jim noticed shortly after he had strolled into the kitchen to grab a glass of whiskey for himself. With a small smirk, he got to work afterward, only pulling the few items that Oswald had stored in the pockets of his various clothing items to put them safely away on the kitchen counter. It wasn't much anyway, only his phone, a set of keys, a bit of spare change, a switchblade, and, of course, his release papers and the certificate. Not very surprising, really.

Just as he had switched on the washing machine inside their laundry room to send Oswald's clothes for a spin, he heard the front door open and close. »Jim? Are you home already?«

Jim took a deep breath as he walked out of the small laundry room to face his fiance with a nervous little grin just as Lee slipped out of her high heels and her coat. He had no idea how she would react to the news of them having a former criminal with them for the night but he knew Lee and he knew that she was much tougher than anyone he had ever dated. »Hey, Lee…« He grinned and immediately her face dropped at his sight.

»What did you do?« She sighed, quickly hanging up her coat and grabbing the plastic back with the Chinese takeout again that she had set down on the side table next to the coat rag where they usually put their keys too. Despite her best efforts, she couldn't hide the small smirk pulling on her lips the moment this question left her mouth before she walked past him, not without giving him a small kiss on the cheek, to put the take out in the kitchen. »Whose stuff is this?« She asked as she nodded to Oswald’s belongings that Jim had just put on the counter for safe keeping.

»So … Remember my visit to Arkham I told you about?« She nodded with her brows raised ever so slightly at the casual tone her fiance was desperate to hit. »Turned out it was about Oswald.« He gave her the rundown of what happened during this day and while he did, he felt like he was retelling some stupid movie he had seen during the afternoon and not like something that he had actually experienced. Lee remained calm throughout his retelling of the day’s events but when he ended and smiled apologetically at her, he could sense that she was a little nervous about it all just by the way she was putting a hand on her stomach. It was not a protective gesture, though. He knew Lee well enough to know that she was not really worried about her own or Jim’s safety, only nervous about the situation as a whole.

»So in other words, Penguin is sitting in our bathtub right now.« She said after a moment, her tone as casual as it would get in a situation like this.

»Pretty much.«

»And tomorrow he’ll leave again?«

»I hope so, yeah. I told him he could stay for the night because he didn't have a place to stay. Listen, I know it's not the best solution, but what was I supposed to do? You’ll see when he comes out … He’s not the same man, Lee - and I wouldn't have thought that I would ever say that. Still, I just couldn't let him leave Arkham tonight without him having a place to stay.« He drove a hand through his hair at her increasingly unnerving stare. »I mean … I always believed in second chances, Lee, and if he truly changed, I want to help him with this new start.«

»Jim Gordon.« She sighed and gently shook her head before she put her hands on both sides of his face and stole a small kiss from his lips. »You never cease to amaze me.« Jim hummed in appreciation of her comment as he decided he would just take it as some form of compliment, even as she gently smacked his jaw before she shrunk back and started to prepare the food she had gotten. »Well, good thing I am always buying too much food nowadays anyway, right?« She then huffed as they could hear movement coming from the bathroom again. Though Lee tried to play it down, he could clearly see her tensing up just slightly as the bathroom door opened quietly before they could hear the uneven pitter-patter of naked feet on the floorboards. Not long after that, Oswald appeared in the doorway to their small kitchen, dressed in the pajama Jim had given him, an uncertain smile tugging at his lips as his eyes fell upon Lee.

»Doctor Thompkins, what an absolute pleasure to meet you again.« Oswald quickly muttered as he stepped closer towards them. He all but drowned in Jim’s pajama although Jim wasn't that much taller than the penguin. »I hope my presence here is not too much of an inconvenience, I can assure you that I do not pose a threat to you, nor to your unborn child. I am sane now, I even have a document proving that, I-«

»Everything is fine, Oswald.« Lee cut him off before the young man could go on a tangent about this whole situation. She was a wise woman, after all. »We are happy to have you here, Oswald, and to support you during your new start. Jim already told me everything.« His face lit up at that and Jim was, for a moment, not quite sure if he had ever seen a more honest expression on anyone’s face for that matter.

It wasn't long after that, and after they had eaten, that Oswald fell asleep on their couch, huddled in a cocoon of blankets. Lee had done her best to properly patch him up after Doctor Miller’s haphazard treatment of his injuries. The man might as well just have given him a band-aid and a lollipop and said »There, there, all better now, Buddy« to magically fix Oswald’s broken nose. Of course, Lee didn't have all the equipment needed at her apartment, but she had been all too eager to prove to Jim that fixing a broken nose was one of the easiest things for her. She had succeeded, even though it had first brought more pain to Oswald.

But though he seemed at peace for now and quite content with his new situation, hopeful even that this new chance he had gotten would actually mean something awesome to him, Jim could only worry about what would be next for Oswald. Even as the next morning came and they found themselves seeing Oswald off after breakfast with just the sparse belongings he still had after all this mess, Jim couldn't help but feel concerned.

»He’s going to be alright, don't worry.« Lee smiled at him as she rested her chin on his shoulder as they were standing at the window of their apartment that was overlooking the street. From their position, they could see how Oswald actually left the apartment building, how he paused for a moment as if uncertain of where to go before he nodded to himself and trailed off down the street. »That's Oswald Cobblepot we’re talking about, after all. He’s going to be fine.«

Then why did it feel like Jim had just sent a lamb to the slaughter?

 

**-End of Chapter 2-**


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit slow, but bear with me here it gets better soon

**Gotham City**

He had not much now that he was free and yet his freedom in and of itself was priceless. No one knew this better than Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot as he was leaving the bakery with the small pink package in his hands. He had gotten a second chance in this city and he would make the most out of that second chance for certain. Despite the fact that he had now spent the last bit of his money on cupcakes, his steps felt light and his heart warm as he shuffled down the street. The cupcakes weren't for him, of course, although he was a man fond of candy and chocolate, and as he reached the apartment complex where Butch was now residing with Tabitha, he could feel the first hint of nervousness creeping back down into his mind.

It was still quite early in the day and the air outside cuttingly cold. He knew that having to face Butch and his girlfriend wouldn't be easy, after all, not only had he taken Butch’s hand, which in the end had caused him more harm than it would have benefitted him, but also had he killed Tabitha’s brother. Surely, they would not just forgive him right away. But at least he could leave them a sign of his good will - and hope that they wouldn't decide to murder him when he would confront them. It was not quite so surprising to Oswald as he took the elevator into the penthouse that Butch and Tabitha were living in, that he was immediately grabbed by two of the security guards that were waiting in front of the elevator to the penthouse. They were like Butch: large, tall and utterly intimidating.

»I came to see Mr. Gilzean!« Oswald smiled at the guards at his sides who grabbed him under the arms immediately as they saw him, alarmed by his presence. He couldn't even blame them. He was not surprised by the way he was handled either, not even by the roughness of how he was dragged into the main room of the penthouse. While he was dragged inside by both of the guards as if they needed to make sure he could not overpower them, he witnessed how one of his old lackeys hurried onwards.

»Boss, you never guess who just knocked at the door!« He hollered as he breached the threshold to the living room of the lavish penthouse.

»Well, if I never guess then why not just tell me, Jackass?« He could hear Butch’s gruff voice from the next room. »If you say I’ve three guesses, well, then that’s a game. It's an annoying and stupid game but at least it makes sense … Son of a-« His words got cut off as the guards dragged Oswald through the door and Butch’s eyes fell upon his former boss and friend.

»Hi!« It was then that Oswald was dragged into the living room of the penthouse and greeted Butch with the brightest smile he could fathom at the moment. It felt actually quite nice to see his old friend again after that long a time in Arkham, although the guilt of having cut off Butch’s hand would probably never leave him. He could only hope now that his friend would forgive him, though.

Raising from her spot in front of the crackling fire in the fireplace next to Butch, Tabitha grabbed a cheese knife from the plate next to her. She was, as always a pretty sight to behold with her dark curls framing her face and her eyes wild as she looked at Oswald, the knife raised almost threateningly at him, ready to strike as soon as he would give her reason to do so. »Well, well, well.« She sneered.

»I heard that they let you out of Arkham.« Butch huffed as he rose to his feet as well. Finally, his men released their hold on Oswald as well so that Oswald was no longer in danger of dropping the box with the cupcakes in his hands.

»Yes.« He smiled and continued with a little laugh. »Happy day! I’m sane. I have a certificate!« However, as he went to pull out the certificate from the inside pocket of his coat, immediately the guards and Butch’s other lackey drew out guns at him. Well, he wasn't surprised and he wasn't faulting them either. Better safe than sorry, right? He had been a dangerous criminal, after all! Still, Oswald pulled out his certificate to show it to Butch and Tabitha with a smile, before he started to realize that maybe he should have announced his visit beforehand. »B-But I hope I'm not intruding. I just got back in town and thought it’d be rude not to say hello to an old friend.«

Butch’s chuckle at his words took him by surprise, just as Tabitha’s as she and her boyfriend exchanged a look of sheer and utter confused amusement. »An old friend?« Butch asked with a wide almost shark-like smile that managed to unsettle Oswald just a little.

»Well, yes … I mean we had our ups and downs but on a whole, I thought we were friends … weren't we? That's what I recall, anyhow. Uhm … Cupcake?« He quickly offered the box to Butch, after all, that was the reason for his visit, right? A peace offering, hoping to gain forgiveness from his old friend.

»You killed my brother.« Tabitha finally stepped towards him with her knife still held in front of her as if she truly wanted to stab him. Well, Tabby had always been funny to be around. »You messed with Butch’s mind and made him your slave!«

And the thing with the hand, of which Butch was all too eager to remind him now too as he raised his prosthesis and stepped closer in an almost threateningly fashion. »I-I guess I was pretty terrible, huh?« He managed to bring out as he looked up at Tabitha now that she was closer. »I want to apologize sincerely. I wasn't thinking straight.« He didn't know if they believed him, but he could understand if they wouldn't. After all, it was true, he had done terrible things to these people and there was probably no proper way to ever make up for what he did. Cupcakes would not bring back Butch’s left hand or Tabitha’s brother. Still, it was a start, wasn't it?

»Apology accepted.« Tabitha said and Oswald couldn't stop his smile from spreading even further until even his cheeks started to hurt a little. »Let's kill him.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

It was the usual hustle and bustle inside the precinct as Jim finally sunk down on his chair at his desk. »Mornin’ Harvey!« He greeted his friend right away as Bullock spared a glance over his newspaper with a grunt.

»And why are you in such a good mood today?« He grunted. »Haven't you heard the news?«

»What news?«

»Penguin was released from Arkham last night! Can you believe that, Jim?« Harvey finally put down his newspaper before he all but threw it at Jim across the table. Jim took the paper gingerly to open it on the same page Harvey had read. Sometimes it was unbelievable to him just how quick the journalists caught up. Then again, it was no secret that Oswald had been released, right? Hugo Strange probably talked to the press himself even, released a statement about his success story. The public wanted to know what happened to Gotham’s most renowned criminal, after all.

»I know.« Jim sighed after glancing at the tacky headline of ‘Penguin on the loose!’ with a large photo of the criminal that took up most of the page right underneath, folded the newspaper again and threw it back at Harvey who started at him even more disgruntled than before if that was even possible. Harvey was always in a bad mood, especially when Penguin was concerned in any way.

»What do you mean, you know?« He groaned and probably could already tell that his partner had had something to do with Oswald’s release from the asylum, but didn't dare to put it into words right away.

»Remember how I told you that Strange wanted to see me yesterday?« He asked and tried his most inconspicuous full-teeth grin.

»Jim … Jim what have you done?«

»I did nothing, Harv.«

»Then why is Penguin free, Jim?« He groaned. »Or am I to believe that it's sheer coincidence that your boyfriend was released from Arkham the day you went there to have a nice little chat with none other than Professor Strange himself? Really? Come on, Jim, I might be a drunk son of a bitch, but at least I am not an idiot. You had something to do with that sleazy little bastard being released from Arkham and you better start singing before I hear it from Cobblepot or someone else.« He was angry, definitely, but Jim only rolled his eyes. Since day one, Oswald Cobblepot had been like a red rag to a bull for Harvey. In Harvey’s eyes, Oswald was the root of all problems in this city, maybe even the antichrist, depending on how much Harvey had to drink already.

Before Jim came to Gotham, and before Jim had decided not to kill Oswald, life had been simple in this city for people like Harvey. He had enjoyed the established rules, had enjoyed knowing how things would go and how to work with the criminals. It had been a good, comfortable life for people like Harvey Bullock. But then Jim had rolled around and decided to not kill Oswald Cobblepot and with that decision of his rookie partner, Harvey’s problems had started, as it sometimes seemed whenever Harvey would go on a tangent about it all. All of this, everything that happened ever since that fateful day at the pier, was Oswald’s fault - and Jim’s, depending on the day and Harvey’s mood.

»What was I supposed to do, Harv?« He finally gave up the charade with a sigh. »You should have seen him there. He was … He is sane, Harvey. Or … maybe not sane per se but, he is clearly not the old Oswald. I don't know what Strange exactly did to him, but I can assure you, he couldn't hurt a fly even if he wanted to anymore.«

»And since when are you and good old Ozzie such good friends, Jimbo?«

»We aren’t.«

»Jim, come on … tell me that you did not take him home with you.« Did Harvey really know him so well as to know what Jim would do in a situation like this? Apparently, he did.

»He didn't have a place to stay, Harvey, what was I supposed to do?« He found himself sighing, despite the fact that they both knew that there would have been alternatives to take Oswald home with him and that there was no denying of that either. He could have brought him to a homeless shelter or paid for a hotel room for one night. Yet he had decided to bring him home with him. He didn't regret doing it either.

»Not deliver a possibly very dangerous individual to your flat where you live with your pregnant fiance!«

»I assure you that he did not mean danger to us, Harvey. Even if he would still be the old Oswald, he wouldn't have had a reason to do anything to us.«

»Jim, I never thought you would be this naive!« Harvey groaned before he leaned closer to Jim on his desk to lower his voice to a whisper. »Jim … Jim, he went to Arkham for you - for months. He was in there for months while Strange and the other inmates had time to do god knows what to him and he had time enough on his hands to not only find a way to trick Strange into believing him to be sane but also to plot revenge on you! You know how vengeful that little weirdo is!«

Sure, he had a point there, yet, Jim couldn't share his worries. »I assure you that I am not naive, Harvey. He is not that person anymore. It was actually quite pleasant to be around him last night. We had a very nice evening together, Lee, Oswald and I.«

»Do you hear yourself talking or am I the only one who thinks that this is crazy?«

»Oh yes, I do, Harv. We had Chinese takeout and watched TV while we ate. Oswald told us a few things about Arkham and Lee patched him up before we all went to sleep.«

»At least tell me you didn't sleep in the same bed.«

»No don't worry, of course, Oswald and Lee slept in the bed.«

»What?«

»A joke, Harvey! He slept on the couch and he was a very well-behaved guest.« Jim chuckled at Harvey’s scandalized face at this very moment. »No, but really, Harv. You should have been there and seen what I have seen in Arkham. Some big guy just threw him across the room and he didn't do anything about it. He just took it and didn't even try to defend himself.«

»He is a weasel, Jim.« Harvey groaned. »We all know that he knows how to act.«

»Yes, but this was not an act.«

»Where is he now anyway?«

»I don't know. He left this morning. I can only assume that he’s going to find a place to stay at a friend’s place or something. Oswald will get back on his feet one way or another.« Because after all he was still Oswald and Oswald Cobblepot always landed on his feet for some odd reason that he would never fully understand.

»So, in other words, you lost track of a dangerous criminal who was just released from Arkham Asylum and might pose a threat to this city.«

»No, I lost track of a former Arkham patient who was officially declared sane and properly released back into society yesterday.« Jim smirked finally. »And since Professor Strange decided that Oswald was sane enough to let him go, who am I to argue with that? I am certain that, if Oswald needs help in any way, that he will come to us and ask.«

»Who are you to argue with that?« Harvey huffed. »Jim, ever since you came into this city all you ever did was to argue with anyone who dared to say anything you didn't like. So what's different now? You cannot honestly want Penguin back on the streets of Gotham, can you?«

»I believe in second chances, Harv, you know that better than anyone else. So, if he truly changed, I believe he deserves a second chance from us. And if he does as much as sneeze in the wrong direction, we put him right back into Arkham, okay?«

»It's just a matter of time, I tell ya.«

»Yeah, but until then, give him a chance. That's really not that much to ask for.« Although Harvey finally, and very reluctantly, agreed, could Jim not shake off the feeling that Harvey might be right, in the end. He had been right back then when he told him that having Cobblepot alive would just mean more trouble for them, yet Jim trusted his instincts as he had trusted them back then when he decided to spare him. Yes, Oswald had meant trouble for this city since that day at the pier, but under him as the king of the underworld, Gotham had also flourished too and with him, at the very least, they had been able to get rid of Galavan once and for all. It still held true what Oswald once told him. Gotham was his home, he loved this city and he would do what it would take to protect her. And in addition to all of that, Bruce Wayne could have died, had it not been for Oswald’s willingness to help and Jim would have probably been sent to Blackgate for the murder of Theo Galavan by now. It was true that Oswald Cobblepot, would he go back to his old ways, be a formidable foe, but it was also indisputable that he was a valuable ally at times too, whenever this city was in serious trouble.

Oswald loved Gotham, first and foremost. This was his home. No, he _was_ Gotham, some might argue, and no matter their differences, would Gotham be under a serious threat, one could trust Penguin to save this city, even when the police was not able to.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham City - Downtown**

Oswald couldn't say that his travels through town were all that pleasant after he had left Butch and Tabitha. People laughed at him and he smiled back at them as he was walking through the streets. He didn't hold it against those people that they were laughing at him, after all, he was a funny sight to behold right now, wasn't he? He would probably laugh too. In fact, he did laugh when they laughed, there was no point in feeling irritated or annoyed, after all. Seeing a man who had been tarred and feathered was something that not even the people of Gotham saw all too often.

As he reached Edward’s apartment building, he felt a little unsure of whether or not he had the right to intrude like this, all dirty and torn up. Surely, Edward would want to help him and if he would ask nicely, surely Edward would take him in for a few days until Oswald would have found a job and figured out how to go from here. Still, he didn't have a gift for his friend and he remembered his mother saying never to go on a visit empty-handed. Surely, Ed would understand his dilemma, though. They were friends, after all, and Ed would know that there was no ill intent on his part. Ed always knew.

So, standing in front of the building, Oswald took a deep breath of the fresh morning air, braced himself and walked inside. Only minutes after, he had found his way on the top floor and to Edward’s door. He could hear a bit of music softly playing through the sliding metal door that separated Edward’s home from the rest of the refurbished factory. From the first moment he had woken up in Edward’s apartment right underneath the roof of the abandoned factory, he had thought the somehow this place suited someone like Edward and the green tint that always remained inside due to the massive neon sign just outside of his window, had always been calming to him, even in his hours of greatest need and anger back when Edward had nursed him back to health. Had he ever properly thanked him? He remembered calling him a lot during his work hours whenever he had been searching for something in his flat. Surely, that had been annoying - and risky! After all, he had been a fugitive of the law at this point! Would anyone have found out about Ed’s involvement with him … He much rather not think about it now. Instead, he knocked at the door, hoping that Ed would hear it over the music.

To his luck, it only took a few seconds until the door slid open. »Penguin!« Edward laughed as their eyes met, sheer glee at his sight sparking from his amber eyes so that Oswald really could not help but mirror Edward’s excitement immediately.

»Hi!« Oswald smiled widely at his friend. »Oh ...I'm sorry to intrude … Uhm … I’m a bit of a mess…« He then mumbled tugging on his soiled woolen coat. He could see how Edward’s expression changed as his friend seemed to fully take in how he looked, but he couldn't quite understand why that was. Wouldn't he know it any better, he would almost claim that Edward seemed a bit concerned all of the sudden. »I was just passing by and I … may I … may I come in for a moment? I … These feathers are not as warm as they look…«

»Of course!« Edward immediately stepped aside to let him shuffle inside his apartment. Despite that spring was just around the next corner, Gotham was still freezing cold these days and Oswald had only just started to notice how cold he really was after the mess Butch and Tabitha had made. Then again, they couldn't have known that he would walk through the town like this or otherwise they would surely have done something about the state he was in. They were not complete heartless people, after all. »Where are my manners? It's so good to see you!«

The moment he stepped inside, Oswald at least took off his dirty hat and wrung it in his hands a little, just to busy his clammy fingers. He couldn't help but feel increasingly more nervous now that he was inside his friend’s flat. »So how have you’ve been, old friend? Well, I hope?« Oswald was quick to try and play down his increasing uncertainty in the eyes of his best friend, as his eyes quickly darted through the room. Edward hadn't that big of an apartment so what he was about to ask of him suddenly seemed too huge to even consider.

»Yeah!« Ed seemed still excited as he closed the door and walked further into the room. »Well, I have been busy - I’ve been really busy. And what about you? I’ve heard that you've been released? What … What's … What happened?« Although he did his best to act playful, the concern was back lacing Edward’s voice as he crossed his arms now. He was such a good friend, of course, he would worry when seeing Oswald in such a mess. He really could deem himself lucky having such good a friend. Even more, he started to wonder if he should ask Edward for help or not. After all, there was so much else Edward had to do, right? He was busy and Oswald just something to weigh him down.

»O-Oh … Just good old Butch and Tabitha having fun. They talked about killing me, so … this is actually pretty nice of them, considering.«

There was one thing that Oswald had always liked about Edward, what may have even been the reason as to why he had gravitated so much to his friend after his initial resentment of Ed, and that was how caring the taller man was. He was nothing but some low-life criminal before Arkham, a fugitive even who had just tried to kill the mayor and still Edward had extended his helping hand towards him, offered him a warm bed to sleep in, food and his friendship to heal from his gunshot wound. He even helped him through his grief. Oswald knew already that he would never be able to ever repay him for all he had done. Even to this day, Edward remained not only caring but even protective over Oswald. It was clear, even to Oswald, judging by Edward’s change in expression, that his first instinct was to go to Butch and Tabitha and demand retaliation for the way they had treated Oswald earlier.

»Pretty nice?« Edward repeated with raised brows, cocking his head slightly to one side. He didn't seem angry, though, or at least he tried not to. »They did a pretty good job on you in Arkham, huh?«

He could hear the resentment for Tabitha and Butch drip from Ed’s voice and as his friend, he was concerned that Ed might continue to follow this path of destruction he had discovered after the murder of his girlfriend. »I'm here to tell you, Ed, as a friend, that violence and anger are not the answer.  I am a changed man. Better and you can change too.« Of course, that was not the only reason why he came here in the first place, but it was one of them. Never would he want to lose Edward to Blackgate or Arkham or death by the hands of the police or another gangster.

»Cool.« Edward grinned and put his hands on his hips now instead. He seemed a little reserved all of the sudden. »Tempting offer. The thing is, the me I am right now is  kinda hitting my stride and I'm really grateful for all that you've taught me - and that bad stuff you told me about Gordon is really paying off.« At least they could still laugh together, though Oswald had the feeling he should be a bit more conflicted about this situation. After all, Jim Gordon had helped him a lot yesterday. He was a good friend and he wouldn't want him to end up in trouble because of something Oswald had told Edward.

»Is it?« He still found himself asking with a smile, as he was finding joy in the way Edward seemed to find glee in the things he had told him about the detective.

»It is! It helped me to create the perfect puzzle to get rid of my Jim Gordon dilemma. Normally I would love to share but … to be honest, the new you is kinda freaking me out right now.« He couldn't quite deny that a part of him felt maybe a little hurt as he found himself standing on the other side of Edward’s door again as it slid shut in his face a moment later. He was a bit taken aback by his friend’s reaction to his new personality, but he couldn't quite blame Ed either.

Ed was on a path of his own to discover who he truly was now and who was Oswald to deny him that? He was like a butterfly that was finally escaping its cocoon. Surely, Oswald had no right in interfering with his metamorphosis! Of course, as his friend, he would like to be there for Edward and help him along the way, but he just wasn't this person anymore and so he couldn't help Edward, but just as well he couldn't deny him this new role in life or this change. He knew what it meant to change, after all, and he knew how important it was to find one’s true self. In fact, finding out who one truly was deep down inside, was probably the most important thing.

Still, the fact that Edward was so uncomfortable with Oswald’s new self, put him in a new dilemma now. He didn't even get the chance to ask Edward for help and maybe it was better this way too, but what now? Where to go? What to do? First, he really needed to get cleaned up, he assumed, and then he would need to find a job and maybe a new home. Finding a place to get cleaned up, was almost impossible for him, as it turned out and, in the end, he had to throw away his woolen hat and his coat. They were ruined and there was just no way he could ever get them cleaned up again. It was a shame, really. He never liked throwing away things, probably because he and his mother had never had much while he had been growing up.

Unlike so many other people, Oswald had learned the value of the things he possessed quite early on in life, just as he had learned that, if he wanted to be successful, he couldn't wait for others to do the work for him. He had worked hard his whole life, just as his mother had taught him to. Then again, in the end, he had been successful, he had been someone in this city just as he had promised his mother before, and yet he hadn't been happy. He was much happier now with not a dollar to his name and only the clothes that he wore on his body.

It were these thoughts that made him visit the cemetery as the day slowly came to a closure. Would he still be Penguin, would he still be this ruthless criminal, he wouldn't have had a hard time getting back on his feet. Penguin would have spent the day watching people, finding ways to use those he would see on the streets, making money, making alleys, rebuilding his empire in a heartbeat. But he was not him anymore. He was only Oswald Cobblepot and he didn't even know what he would be good at now. So he did what he had always done when he didn't know anything else anymore. He went to his mother for advice.

Her graveside was right underneath an old willow tree which would probably be in full bloom by the time summer came around, giving his mother a bit more of a shadow throughout the hot summer days. The weather in Gotham tended to be gloomy and wet for the most part, but whenever the sun would shine, it could get unbearably hot in the streets of the city. Behind him, just outside of the cemetery were trucks and cars rushing by on a bridge above the river and the sky was of a steely grey with a thin layer of fog always hovering just above the ground of the cemetery. »Hello, Mother.« He muttered as he finally reached her gravestone. A simple white marble headstone. He was glad to see that Gabe had taken care of the headstone the way he wanted it to look like. Gertrud Kapelput, beloved mother. The world didn't need to know more. »What a lovely spot. I am so sorry I couldn't be here for the funeral. But I think you would be proud of me. I'm a changed man. Or at least I’m trying to be. To be honest, I don't know if I’m going to make it without you.« He didn't even bring her flowers. A part of him did regret that he had bought those cupcakes for Butch and Tabitha, after all, they had not repaid him too kindly. Then again, this was not about them either. The cupcakes had been for them to see that he meant what he said and it was not for him to decide how they would treat this gift or him. They had been rightfully angry with him, after all. Still, had he not bought those cupcakes, he would have been able to buy his mother some lilies at least.

Suddenly, just standing here and looking at the stone in front of him, he felt as if the weight of the whole world came crashing down on him and he could no longer hold back the tears spilling from his eyes. He had done so much wrong in his life, had done so many bad things with it. He had betrayed and lied and stolen and killed. It really was no wonder that he had no friends left who would want to help or support him with this new beginning. Maybe that was just what he deserved too for all the terrible things he had done in the past. He would have to face this new life of his on his own, alone, without his mother, without his friends, without money or influence. He needed to start over from scratch and for once in his life, he didn't know if he could do it. Not without his mother.

But he remembered how she had cooed over him, how she watched him with those big blue eyes of hers, always so very proud of her _little cobblepot,_ no matter what he did. To her, he was the most perfect thing in the world and he hadn't even been able to protect her. He remembered how she taught him her mother tongue with great patience so that they have something to share among themselves. He remembered how she tried to teach him how to cook and how they had spent their evenings cooking and baking when he had been little. Now that he was older, he knew how much she had needed to forgo the things she had wanted for herself for his sake. All he had ever wanted was to give his mother the palace and luxuries that she deserved. Not even that he had managed to achieve.  

»Hello?« Oswald hadn’t heard the footsteps on the grass coming towards him and as he finally realized that he was no longer alone, he quickly rubbed the tears from his reddened cheeks in a sorry attempt of gathering himself again. »I’m terribly sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.«

»Not at all.« Oswald quickly brushed off the concerns of the man that walked up to him. He was a finely dressed gentleman, wearing an expensive looking suit and overcoat that Oswald would have liked for himself too and that Penguin would have probably just taken for himself. Then, however, he noticed the bouquet of flowers the stranger carried with him and pointed at them, an amused little chuckle leaving his lips at the coincidence. »Lilies.« He smiled. Well, at least one person had thought about getting his mother some flowers for her graveside.

»Her favorites, if memory serves.« The man replied solemnly as he too looked down at the headstone with something akin to fondness in his dark eyes.

»Yes, they were.« Oswald replied, his eyes dropping to the headstone once more. It had been his wish to have a small lily blossom on the stone right over his mother’s name too and he was glad that Gabe had given his instructions to the mason just as he had asked him to. A real friend, this Gabe, and yet his mother’s funeral had probably been a lonely one. Just her, the priest and Gabe who had paid for everything. Not being here as his mother had been laid to rest was probably one of the biggest failures in his life and he would never quite forgive his old self for not being able to attend the funeral. He had been too busy getting his revenge and what did it cost him, in the end? Revenge and spite had cost him everything he had ever had and everything he had ever been. »Did you know her?«

»A long time ago.« The stranger sighed. »I found her again only in death, I’m afraid.« Sometimes it was hard to imagine his mother as a young woman or having a life of her own before he came around. He had been the apple of his mother’s eye and she had been his whole world, only the two of them against the rest of the world. How would he move forward from this? How could he recover from this? Maybe he had been let go too soon from Arkham. Maybe he should go back and ask Professor Strange to take him in again. »I’m Elijah Van Dahl.« The man finally introduced himself with a handshake which Oswald was all too eager to reciprocate with a smile. He didn't quite know what it was about this man, Elijah, but he had sympathetic eyes, a friendly twitch around his mouth perhaps, something that seemed familiar and yet all too foreign to Oswald.

»Oswald Cobblepot.« He replied finally as he turned back to his mother's grave with a fond smile on his lips. It had been his mother's wish to anglicize his last name. Growing up in Gotham was hard enough. Growing up poor in Gotham even harder and growing up poor in Gotham with an obviously foreign name something not to wish on your worst enemies. Looking back, it clearly had made life a little easier for him, after all, the other children already had found him to be weird enough as it was.

»Cobblepot?« The man replied surprised. »You were related to Gertrud?« As he looked at the man now, there was more than surprise in his eyes, not even confusion, but something else entirely, almost as if he was searching in Oswald’s face for something he already knew but wanted to hear from his mouth.

»My mother.« He smiled and the man, taken aback by his statement, took a step back but ever so slightly in a way he knew from himself.

»Mother? You’re Gertrud’s son?«

»Yes. I’m sorry … How did you know my-«

»How old are you?«

»Excuse me?«

»How old are you? Gertrud left...«

»I’m thirty-one.«

»Thirty-one years ago, yes, that's right.« He looked almost horrified now, but only for a second as his mind was apparently reeling and trying to make sense of everything that had just happened between him and this young man at the cemetery. »My God she never told me.« He exclaimed in a huff of air that was leaving his mouth to form a little cloud in front of his lips.

»Told you what?« Oswald replied knee deep in confusion at this point. What a weird man, what a weird conversation.

»That I had a son.«

 

**-End of Chapter 3-**


	4. Chapter 4

**Gotham City - Gotham City Police Department**

It was Edward Nygma’s opinion that just because a person was in love with someone, this could not dictate every little thing about their behavior or the way they proceeded to move on with their lives. He had always lived by this belief, no matter how hard he had fallen in love or with whom. To him, it had always been important to remain his own person, to stay true to himself in spite of his love for some other human being. He had witnessed firsthand what terrible fate could befall a person if they lost themselves in love and gave up who they really were. He had seen it happen to his mother, he had seen it happen to so many other people. He couldn't quite pinpoint when he had decided that he was in love with Oswald Cobblepot. He didn't know if it had been when he had first met him at the precinct and talked to him for the very first time or if it had been the weeks in which Oswald had stayed with him after this whole Galavan fiasco had taken place.

Maybe it had been the moment as Oswald had decided to take back his mantle as the Penguin and planned his revenge on Theo Galavan properly. He couldn't tell. He didn't want to either and it was probably not even that important. After Kristen, he had been a lot more reluctant to accept his feelings for Oswald than he should have been. It wasn't so much the fact that Oswald was a man - this was Gotham, who cared? - as it was for his fear of being able to hurt Oswald as he had hurt Kristen too.

So, as he had heard the news of Oswald’s release from the Arkham Insane Asylum the very next morning, he had been more than joyous at the thought of not only getting his best friend back but also the man he felt quite deeply for too. All the more had he been creeped out by how much his friend had changed in Arkham. It was as if Oswald was a whole other person now as if the most important fragment of his personality had been stripped away.  Sending him away had not been an easy decision either. He had acted on a moments notice, maybe even without thinking properly about it at all, looking back on it now. Just as Oswald had knocked on his door, Edward had been planning how to get rid of Jim Gordon properly - once and for all before the detective could find out more about Kristen’s disappearance. He could not have this idiot investigating Kristen’s disappearance any further and if that meant he had to pin Galavan’s death on him then so be it. Although … could it be called that anyway? After all, he knew from Oswald that Jim did, in fact, kill good old Theo.

Anyway, he could not have someone as gentle and nice like Oswald around while he was planning to get Oswald’s good friend Jim behind bars. He wouldn't like that one bit. _But that's not the reason why you sent him away now, is it?_ His inner voice of reason argued back ever so gently now. Ever since he had killed Kristen and embraced who he really was, the voice inside of him seemed much calmer and forgiving to him. »Of course, not.« Edward found himself muttering under his breath and quickly looked up from the work in front of him on his desk in the laboratory to see if anyone might have heard him. Then again, no one ever came to him. No one wanted to talk to weird ol’ Ed if it wouldn't be necessary. Still, he cast a small glance over his shoulder before pushing his glasses up again.

No, of course, all this was not the reason why he had sent Oswald away because if it was, he wouldn't be haunted by the way Oswald had looked at him as he had closed the door in his face. He was selfish, yes, that much was true. In fact, his selfishness was a key point of his character. It was also true that he didn't want Oswald to interfere with his plans, plus this new softer version of Oswald was somewhat more creepy than the bloodstained killer he had been depicted as in the media. Yes, all of those arguments were true and the reason for his behavior, but all of those were not the true reason why he had sent him away at last. He was afraid. That was the truth in all of this. The moment he had realised how different Oswald suddenly was now post-Arkham, the moment he had told him that it had been pretty nice of Gilzean and his bitch to not kill him with that all too honest smile on his face that had made the little dimples on his cheeks stand out a lot more prominent than ever before, Edward had known that, would Oswald remain with him, he would hurt him like he had hurt Kristen. And that was a mistake he was not going to make a second time. He had once killed someone he loved and he would not do it again.

Hell, these days it seemed as if everything he touched would wither away right in front of him underneath the tips of his fingers.

Before, he had not been afraid that this could even be a possibility with Oswald and him, but now … with this version of Oswald … He was but a lamb that was ready for the slaughter. The old Oswald - No, the _real_ Oswald, would never be in any danger from him and his darker side. The real Oswald would know how to fight back if it would ever come to this and unlike Kristen, or really anyone else in his life, this Oswald would have embraced him as he was, darkness included. No, Oswald would have celebrated Edward’s inner demons even. Maybe it was that what had drawn him to Oswald in the first place. The knowledge of being seen for who he was and accepted exactly like this person too. Oswald had seen him, the real Edward Nygma behind the facade that he was putting up every day of his miserable life. He had truly understood him and he had not turned away in fear or disgust. Not at all.

It was this Oswald that he wanted back and yet, here he was, sitting in his lab, thinking about the way Oswald had looked at him out of those pure blue eyes, smiling, even as he had stabbed him in the back and sent him to his doom. Maybe that was a bit extreme, but, in the end, Oswald had been one of the most feared criminals of Gotham, hated by many and this new version of him … No, surely he was okay.

A knock on his door made him flinch as it ripped him straight from his thoughts like a slap to the face and as he turned around on his chair, he almost immediately regretted doing just that as he was faced with none other than the man he planned on destroying. These days it became harder and harder to feign a smile whenever he would look at Jim fucking Gordon. Maybe the fact that Oswald held him in such high regard added a little to the fact that Edward hated him so much. He would never admit it though. »Hey, Ed.« He was greeted swiftly, almost like an old friend. They had eaten together a few times but only thanks to their girlfriends at the time. To Jim, he was only one more freak. One day he would set this building on fire and make sure the doors would be locked from the outside.

»Hey!« He replied, dragging the syllable out as long as he possibly could without seeming suspicious. »Jim, my friend, what brings you here?«

He seemed almost taken aback by his friendliness as he leaned in the door with one of his more forced concerned smiles on his face. How could Oswald like a man like this even? Oh, of course, Oswald had never outright told him that he liked Jim in this particular fashion, but Ed had eyes and he had seen the way Oswald had looked at Jim the night when they had all assembled in Ed’s apartment to go on a hunt for Galavan’s head. He wouldn't claim to be the most handsome person in this city, but at least he didn't look constipated when he smiled. To Edward, it was an enigma how the most beautiful women, like Barbara Kean and Leslie Thompkins, could fall for this guy, and now Oswald too. »Oh, nothing.« Jim finally managed to get out and waved at him dismissively. »Nothing, really. It's just … It's stupid, really. But I wondered … Well, I assume you know that Penguin was released from Arkham and I wondered if you heard from him, lately.«

Had Oswald turned to Jim after he had sent him away? Had he told Jim everything? »Of course, I know, it's all everyone talks about for the last three weeks.« He responded a little too aggressively and was quick to reign himself in again as he could almost feel the calming hand of his other self on his shoulder, urging him to keep a level head. »I mean … I’ve seen him right after he was released from Arkham, of course. He came to visit me, but I was quite busy back then and my mind … Well, I was still struggling with how Kristen left with this douchebag, you know? Didn't have my head on straight. Haven’t seen him since. Why?«

»Oh.« Jim muttered and dropped his gaze to the floor for a second. »I see. I just thought since you guys were friends, that you might know something about his whereabouts. He somewhat dropped off the radar and I started to get a bit concerned.«

»Why? He is a free man, right? Or does he need to call in now every day and tell you what he’s doing?« Again his voice was much too sharp for this kind of conversation.

»Of course, not.« Jim was quick to shrug off his words. Too quick. There was something going on. »It's just … I may or may not have caused this sudden release from Arkham and I want to make sure that-«

»That he's not going back to his old ways, which would mean that you fucked up royally.«

»Exactly.« Jim sighed and his entire posture relaxed all of the sudden as if a weight had dropped off his shoulders. He even managed a proper laugh. »Harvey is always in my ears for getting Oswald out of Arkham and I couldn't stand it if he was right in the end.«

 _Oh, is that so?_ His inner demon grinned. »Don't worry, as I last seen him, Oswald was as gentle as anyone could be. I doubt that we will hear from him again soon.«

»Still, tell me if you hear anything.« Jim sighed. »I feel responsible for him. Not just because I fear he might turn bad again, but … I mean, he starts from scratch and as far as I know he has nothing left anymore. I can imagine that it must be hard for him to get back on his feet.« Another deep sigh caused Jim to drag a hand over his face before he leisurely knocked on the doorframe he was leaning in and pushed himself off of it. »Just, tell me if you hear anything, alright? Good. I’m off now, don't stay too long either, it's getting late, Ed and you have already done more than enough for these idiots out there. No one is thanking you if you keep forgetting that you have a private life too.«

Edward forced a smile at this. »I try to keep that in mind, Jim.«

Of course, Ed stayed longer than necessary at the lab - out of spite, if nothing else. The streets of Gotham were never quiet, the city never asleep and tonight was no different from any other night as Edward closed his coat and walked out of the precinct. It was April, but spring was still playing coy and seemed neither willing nor motivated to finally hit Gotham. It had started to rain about an hour ago and of course he had no umbrella with him. It were nights like these when Edward really wished he would use his car to get to work a bit more often. Instead he usually walked, but then again he wasn't living too far away from the GCPD in Gotham central anyway so driving in Gotham’s thick traffic seemed more tedious than beneficial if anything. He much rather stretched his long legs on a nice stroll home which he could use to hit the store and buy some groceries on his way too, instead of being crammed up in the small space of his old car, stopping every few minutes at a red light.

Despite how chilly it was, he was actually in quite a good mood even, as he was strolling down the sidewalk tonight with the full moon looming above Gotham and a group of drunk teenage girls shouldering past him with a giggle. He was so close to taking out Gordon by now. He only needed to play his cards carefully now, plan his downfall a little more thoroughly and add a bit finesse to it. Ed was only two blocks from his apartment, as Oswald crept back into his mind again. Either Jim was honestly worried about Oswald and the lack of news around him, or it had been a test. But what kind of test? And why? Thinking about all the possible answers to these questions alone gave him a headache! What did Jim know? Why would he ask about Oswald? He couldn't truly be worried. No. Surely, Jim was happy not to hear anything from the Penguin. No news were good news in this case! And yet … Edward couldn't help but start to feel a little worried too now. What if something had happened to his friend while he had been too occupied planning Jim Gordon’s demise? He claimed to love Oswald, yet he didn't even know where Oswald was, hadn't even visited him in Arkham. All this was starting to seriously mess with his brain - and not in a good way either.

No, he needed to regain his focus on what was really important and that was Jim Gordon’s downfall!

»Excuse me, Sir, would you happen to have a bit of spare change for a meal?« The voice was thin and sounded oh so very small and Ed had almost not heard it at all. Just one of the many beggars of this city, one of the many drunks Gotham produced by the dozen each day, just one more lost soul living on the streets. However, as he looked up at the scene in front of him and witnessed how the beggar whose voice he had heard was turned down wordlessly by the man he had spoken too, he couldn't stop himself from almost choking on his own spit.

»Oswald?« The name was nothing more than a huff of air leaving his lips as he caught a glance of the only friend he had left in this city. Oswald Cobblepot, stood there in all his glorious five feet and six inches, hunched over even worse than ever before, making him appear even smaller than he actually was. At first glance, he almost didn't recognize him, but as Oswald had picked up on the sound of his own name rolling from Ed’s tongue so quietly, and turned his head to look down the sidewalk at Edward, there was no question about the identity of the beggar. He felt his heart sink as he took in the sorry sight before him. Oswald was wearing the exact same clothes he had worn the day he came to Ed, minus the woolen hat with the ridiculous pompom and the coat, but his suit was tattered and dirty and too thin for this indecisive time of the year. He was without protection against rain and wind, his hair longer even than on the day he had last seen him and hanging messily in his face so that he actually needed to brush it out of his forehead when looking up at Ed. His eyes had lost all their fire, but that he had noticed last time already. They seemed dull these days, but that gave him hope that the old Oswald was still in there, locked away by this new persona. He looked thin and sickly pale, the dark circles under his eyes even more prominent than ever before and yet, as he saw Ed, his face split into a huge smile and he came hurrying down the sidewalk as quick as his bad leg allowed him to.

»Ed, is that really you?« Oswald smiled and his voice sounded hoarse, possibly from the cold or lack of sleep, maybe even from a sore throat.

»Oswald … What are you doing out here?« As if he really wouldn't know that! Oh, he wanted to slap himself! Suddenly, Oswald seemed incredibly flustered as he gently shook his head making his hair fall right back over his eyes again. He almost looked a little shy like this and nothing like the Oswald he knew and loved. This was not just a different, softer personality, it was a whole other man and no one could convince him otherwise.

»Oh … I was just…« Yes, what? He seemed to try to find a lie he could tell Edward, something to explain why he had been begging a stranger for money just now because his pride wouldn't allow him to admit to his situation, but then the moment was gone as quickly as it came and he looked up smiling again. »I just asked that friendly gentleman for a bit of money. Haven’t eaten in days, I thought maybe he would have anything to spare, but he was in a hurry … probably didn't hear me…« As he trailed off his voice grew quieter. The old Oswald would have just pulled that man into the next best alley, slit his throat and taken his wallet. The old Oswald had been a survival genius, always on top of his game, always able to make the most out of any given situation. This Oswald, right here, was helpless. _Useless_ , as the voice inside his head so fittingly provided. He had been drawn in by Oswald’s strength and power back in the day, by his fearlessness and his abilities. There was nothing left of that now.

»Yes, probably.« Ed replied with a small frown. A part of him wanted to ask Oswald to come with him, but there was still the thought that he had work to do in his apartment, a crime to plan, and that Oswald, this new Oswald couldn't be trusted. Who told him that this new Oswald wouldn't go running to his sweetheart, Jim, as soon as he would have learned of his plan? No, he couldn't risk it. Instead, he quickly pulled out his wallet from the back pocket of his pants and before Oswald could say anything, he handed him fifty bucks straight and only got a confused stare in return. »Here, Pal, you really should go get something to eat, put some meat back on these bones.«

»O-Oh t-thank you, Ed!« Oswald exclaimed and before he knew it, he was all but tackled by a hug from the much smaller man. It was over almost as quickly as it begun, though. »I … I can't thank you enough … I promise that I’ll pay you back in no time. It won't be long until I will have found work, I can feel it and then I pay you back!« He seemed so honest in his claims, almost as if he really meant what he was saying, which he probably did. Suddenly, Ed couldn't even tell anymore if this might be worse. This was Gotham and no one ever paid his debts back in Gotham - especially not the Penguin.

»It's okay.« He tried to smile but it got stuck somewhere along the way. Something about this exchange was just wrong and awful and he didn't want it to continue. He didn't want to stand here and look at Oswald and hear his voice and see that all too honest smile on his face. He couldn't stand it. »Hey, listen, Oswald … I would ask you to come over and have dinner with me« He could see the tiniest spark lightning up in Oswald’s eyes at these words. »but I’m just going back to grab a few things before returning to the precinct, you know? So much work to do … and … stuff.«

»That's okay!« Oswald chirped with that bright smile he had already grown tired to see, which split Oswald’s face into something Ed couldn't recognize. »I mean … I would never expect … It would have been too much to ask anyway. I-I won't stand in your way … But just don't work too much, okay? I know you love your work and you are brilliant and just because of your work the cops are able to close their cases, but remember that your life isn't just work, right?« Was it a coincidence that Oswald was almost saying the same things as Jim beforehand? He didn't believe much in coincidences.

»Cool.« He found himself saying as he did before on the day Oswald came to him, possibly to ask him for help, and couldn't quite deny the stab he could feel in the pit of his stomach as he did. »Well then, have a good night, Oswald. Go get something to eat and call if you need anything, right?« Ed had walked past Oswald before the small man could muster more than a quick and all too eager to please nod.

»Thank you so much, Ed!« Oswald called after him again and as Ed turned one last look over his shoulder, the former terror of Gotham waved at him with that same bright smile again. It was then that Edward started to realize that the thing that was so disturbing about this smile was not how unfamiliar it was to see on Oswald’s face, but the fact that it wasn't even real. It was nothing more than the mockery of a human expression, a desperate attempt to appear human and natural. It was as artificial as those eyes that had been staring at him only minutes before and it was this thought that made him hasten his steps a little and send shivers down his spine.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham City**

These days, Gotham was almost a little too quiet for Jim’s taste. Of course, they had more than enough work on their hands, but it seemed quieter still. He would pin this on the absence of the Penguin at the head of the table, but he also knew that this was utter nonsense and that the big bang would come rather sooner than later. He could almost feel it, like the sizzling in the air before a thunderstorm. Oswald had been gone for a couple of months, first locked up in Arkham for a crime he didn't even commit and now, for the past couple of weeks there had been no sign of life either, but there was more than enough infighting between the remaining crime groups and families to keep them occupied.

At least their days were a bit calmer now, much to Harvey’s delight, of course, as he liked to repeat at every given opportunity these days and today was no exception either as they were strolling down the sidewalk on their way to their most trusted coffee shop. »I really could get used to that, you know?« Harvey grinned. »No Penguin, no freaks in masks, just the normal day to day crime. Can I get an amen?«

»Amen.« Jim laughed.

»Oh, come on only say it if you mean it. We both know that you are bored stiff already.« Although that was, of course, true, Jim wouldn't say it. Not even he was stupid enough to wish for the return of chaos to this city. No, by now he was more than aware that chaos was a part of Gotham and that he should enjoy the little peace they had right now.

»No honestly. I can use this calm at the moment. Lee and I are planning a wedding, after all, and we have to find a bigger place and furnish the baby's room. So a Gotham without supervillains is a good Gotham in my book. At least for now, I guess.«

Harvey grunted as a response. It wasn't quite what he wanted to hear but close enough at the very least. »I drink to that, my friend.«

The coffee shop that they usually frequented this early in the day to stretch their legs a little was only one block away from the precinct and as it came into view at the next corner something else caught Jim’s eye all of the sudden. In retrospect, he wouldn't even be able to tell what it had been that had alerted him so suddenly. Maybe nothing more of a hunch or his instincts as a cop. Whatever it was that made him turn his head to glance into the alleyway they were passing, in the end, didn't matter. First, all he saw was a lump lying on the ground, maybe a garbage sack, but then he realized that the sack was actually a human being, worse even, the person, a man, was naked except for a pair of boxer shorts and one single sock dangling halfway from his left foot. »Harv, hey, look at that.«

Harvey, who had already walked a few steps, turned around with an annoyed little sigh as he walked back to Jim and looked into the alley as well. »Just a regular bum, Jim, that doesn't concern us.«

But of course, like always, Jim didn't listen to his partner as he already stepped into the alleyway, alarmed by his finding. »Of course, that concerns us, Harv, we are the god damn police.«

»We are the homicide unit, Jim!« Harvey exclaimed in a whine that Jim, by now, knew all too well and was all too happy to ignore. »Come on it's coffee time! Lee kills you if you don't get her the tea and blueberry muffin that she ordered - and you do not mess with a pregnant woman!« He would try to remember Harvey’s words of wisdom later when he would return to his fiance without her blueberry muffin, but for now, he was a cop and it had always been his desire to help people in their time of need. This was no different now as he approached this, as Harvey had called him, bum. Only when he was two steps away from the man that was laying face down on the ground did he realize that what he had thought to be dirt on his skin were in fact bruises that were littering the man almost from head to toe as it seemed now.

»Sir?« Jim approached the man on the ground as he carefully crouched down to put his fingers on his shoulder to not startle the man too much if that was even possible.

»Jim, come on we don't have all day. He's probably just drunk and will wake up soon.« The skin underneath his fingers was cold but not deadly cold, more clammy than anything else. It had rained all through the night and if that man had been lying here throughout the night, he would be in dire need of warmth and fluids and … a hospital at best. First, the man didn't react to him in any way, which usually wasn't a good sign, so he turned him around carefully and gasped at the familiar face in front of him.

»Harv!« He exclaimed yet again. »Come here, Fuck, that's Penguin!«

»What do you mean Penguin?« Finally, even Harvey sprung into action as he came to his side but Jim was already gently smacking Oswald’s left cheek in an attempt to wake him up or get at least a response in some way or another.

»Oswald? Come on, Oswald, wake up already.« He succeeded to draw a reaction only at the fifth slap administered expertly to his cheek as Oswald’s light blue eyes suddenly shot open, staring at him wide-eyed, suddenly wide awake and highly alerted but confused about the situation as his first reaction was to scramble away from Jim in terror before he realized that it was, in fact, Jim who was here with him. »Hey, Oswald, calm down, it's just us.« He tried to calm the young man as he even put his hands up in front of him to make sure Oswald realized that he didn't mean any more harm to come to Oswald. »Just us.« He repeated a little softer this time as he couldn't quite shrug of the feeling that he was dealing with a scared child or a hurt animal at that very moment.

»Jim?« Oswald breathed out heavily and his entire posture suddenly relaxed again, as if his body was collapsing in on himself. This was probably true. The amount of bruising to his face and front was even worse than what his backside had promised and Jim was surprised that he was even moving without wincing in pain. Yet, Oswald had already proven to him on more than one occasion, that he had a very high tolerance for pain anyway. It wasn't easy to bring Oswald Cobblepot  to his knees. »What happened?« He looked a lot worse than he had when Jim had seen him in Arkham. His hair was so long it easily reached the tip of his nose when it fell into his face and looked greasier than it had done in a long time. Dark circles under his eyes told of sleep deprivation just like the nervous twitch to his left eyebrow, a deep cut ran over his right cheekbone starting at the top of the bone underneath the eye and ending almost at the side of his nose, dried blood clung to the lower half of his face. He was a mess. There was no other way to describe it.

»You need to tell us, Pal.« Jim tried but Oswald just pressed a hand to his head in a little moan, which told Jim quite clearly that now was not the time to ask stupid questions but to act. It was clear that the other man was in dire need of a helping hand.

»Where are my clothes … What … What's going on?« Oswald mumbled more to himself than anyone else. He had been attacked, that much was certain at least and whoever had attacked him had probably taken his clothes too. It was the cop inside of Jim who immediately thought that it might be possible that something worse had happened to Oswald while he had been out cold too, but he wouldn't address it now and certainly not in Harvey’s presence either. Instead, Jim was quick to take off his own jacket to wrap it around Oswald’s shoulders, mindful of his injuries as there seemed to be not an inch of Oswald’s body that he would be able to touch without actually hurting the smaller man.

»We’ll find out.« He promised and patted his shoulders carefully through the fabric of his own thick jacket. »Can you walk? We’ll get you back to the precinct. Lee can patch you up and you can take a hot shower.«

Of course, the hospital would be the way to go instead and that was also what his rational mind was telling him to do. He should get Oswald to the nearest hospital and make sure that a professional would take care of him there, but he also knew that Oswald did not possess any money and that no doctor would concern himself with the fate of a homeless person. This was Gotham and one could find suffering at every street corner. Oswald was no rarity in this regard, although it was incredibly strange to see him this vulnerable after everything Oswald had been through these past years. Still, Jim knew already that the doctors at the hospitals in Gotham usually liked to just send people like Oswald away without even looking at them properly.

Oswald nodded and looked still a bit dazed as he did but he didn't argue with him in any way, just let Jim help him back to his feet after a moment that he used to gather himself further. He was thin, all skin and bones as he was standing now but the moment they left the alley with Oswald tucked in between the two cops and pulling Jim’s jacket close around him with one hand, there was this all too friendly smile again making its way to Oswald’s face that was suddenly much more disturbing than this entire situation.

»Thank you, Jim, you're such a good friend.«  

 

**-End of Chapter 4-**


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ed is one jealous bitch.

**Gotham City - Gotham City Police Department**

»What a mess.« Harvey sighed as he dropped into his chair. »What a goddamn mess. Somehow you always manage to destroy every calm day we have, Jim. I really wonder how you are doing that! It's a talent, I tell you. It's a goddamn talent.«

Of course, the other cops in the precinct were watching them with eagle eyes, but Jim, couldn't care less at the moment as he wrapped the blanket tighter around Oswald’s thin body and rubbed over his upper arms in a sorry attempt of bringing back a bit of warmth into his body before he gently shoved Oswald to one of the side doors. »Yeah. Yeah, I know, I am a living breathing miracle.« Jim smirked. »Tell Lee where to find me when you see her - or tell her what happened so that she can get ready to work on an actual living person for once.«

Oswald had a harder time walking than he was willing to admit to and Jim had already noticed that on the way to the precinct which had ended in Harvey and Jim actually supporting the young man between them with each of Oswald’s thin arms spread over both men's shoulders. There was no question that, as soon as he would have stepped through the door to the men's locker room, the other cops would start talking about Oswald Cobblepot being here amongst them and in addition to that almost completely naked too because Jim’s jacket did not cover that much up, after all. He could imagine how uncomfortable Oswald felt. The old Oswald would have died of shame, probably, to walk into a room filled with people who wanted him dead, without clothes. This Oswald, however, seemed less concerned about his pride. As they reached the locker room, even the pleasant smile that was now apparently Oswald’s new default expression and lacked the danger of his old shark-like grin, started to falter and slip away as the pain of his injuries started to catch up with him.

Jim just went to have him sit down on one of the benches in the middle of the room, as Oswald almost fell. He was quick to catch the young man and help him sit down on the wooden bench. His teeth were chattering quite a bit by now, his lips blue from the cold outside. How long had he been freezing this much? And why hadn't he said anything? Then again, there was no hint of how long Oswald had been lying naked in this alleyway, to begin with. It was almost a miracle that he hadn't succumbed to the cold in his condition. As Oswald sat with his feet planted safely on the ground in front of him, he was all but clinging to Jim’s jacket around his shoulders as if for dear life.

»I-I-I am so t-terribly s-sorry, J-Jim … f-for b-being s-s-s-such an in-inconvenience…« Oswald stuttered with his teeth chattering so loudly that it almost physically pained Jim to hear, his own teeth hurting just from the sound. Again, he felt compelled to rub soothing circles over his arms on top of the jacket as if this would help to get warmth back into those bones.

»It's not your fault.« Jim replied almost a bit too quickly. »Oswald, do you think you can stand on your own in the shower?« He expected a nod and another smile from Oswald, but he was surprised to see him shake his head the next moment. Finally, he admitted to his pain and discomfort at least. That was something the old Oswald would have never done. »Okay, listen, here’s what we are going to do. I go get you a towel first, then I’m going to help you out of your shorts, okay?« He didn't like that one bit. It wouldn't be the first time he had ever seen another man naked, of course, but it was still weird to help another man out of his underwear. There was no protest as Oswald tried a little nod that made Jim almost wished he had protested. »Okay then.« He muttered to himself as he cleared his throat and went to the shelf where the towels were stored and immediately grabbed a fresh bar of soap also.

It was just then as he returned to Oswald, that there was a knock on the door to the locker room and a female voice asking if it was okay to enter. Lee. She was a godsend. After Jim opened the door for her, Lee didn't do more than to poke her head inside to have a glance at the situation. »Harvey told me what happened.« She quietly informed Jim while Oswald, though he had surely realized what was happening, didn't react at all to her presence. He couldn't tell if he was ashamed that she would see him like that or if he generally didn't care. Last time Oswald and Lee had met before Arkham, he had seemed to have a great deal of respect for Jim’s fiance and that had still held true even after Arkham and as Lee had patched him up in their apartment. It was either that he was ashamed or that he was in too much pain to care for manners, which really meant something in Oswald’s case especially after Arkham.

Jim followed her eyes to Oswald who was sitting curled up as much as he could and trembling with his entire body on the bench before he looked at her again. She seemed concerned, but that was only the doctor in her. She had sworn to help and heal people, after all, and the image of Oswald sitting there like this was surely not only tucking at Jim’s heartstrings right now. »He doesn't look good.« She quietly assessed as she met his eyes again and Jim tried a humorless smile.

»No, got beaten up quite badly, all his belongings and clothes were stolen. I don't know how long he has been lying there, so … yeah, he’s hypothermic, I would say, that’s why I’m putting him under a hot shower. A bath would be better but it would have been too far to bring him to our apartment. Still, I doubt he's going to be able to stand on his own so I have to help him, I guess.« Lee gently brushed her fingers over his cheek at this with a smile. »I knew it wasn't a good idea to let him loose without supervision … Whatever Strange did to him … He's not able to survive in this city like this!«

»We can talk about that when he’s warmed up, okay? I tell Harvey to go find him something to wear for him from the lost and found storage. Until then, try not to drown him accidentally and bring him to me as soon as possible.« Jim nodded slightly as she pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth and left him and Oswald alone again. Slowly, and with a sigh, he and his towel stepped towards Oswald and crouched down in front of him before he put the towel with the bar of soap on top to Oswald’s side on the bench. He forced himself not to think about how weird all of this was or how inappropriate as he first pulled off the now dirty and ripped sock that Oswald had still been wearing and then the boxer shorts that slid far too easily from Oswald’s narrow hips. He would just keep his eyes on unproblematic parts of Oswald’s body and remind himself of the fact that Oswald was no longer the Penguin and even if he were, that he was a man in desperate need of his physical help right now. The only thing weird about this would be if he would think anything else.

He ended up throwing the towel over his own shoulder and leaving his jacket on the bench as he led Oswald in the adjacent shower room. Covering him up for the way into the shower really didn't make that much sense to him now. They were alone and he had already seen what Oswald had been hiding under his suits all this time. On their way to the shower, it had become increasingly more clear that Oswald was hardly able to stand, let alone walk and his body was wrecked by trembles even more than beroe. Suddenly, Jim couldn't help the swell of sympathy in his chest and the pity he felt for the former crime boss. He felt a little as if he was tending to an injured bird which had broken a wing, that was how frail Oswald felt in his arms as he helped him to the nearest shower and switched it on to let the water heat up.

Soon the shower room was starting to fog up a little from the steam of the running shower. Jim had already slipped out of his dress shirt, tie, pants, shoes, and socks before entering the room. He would get wet anyway, but at least this way he could keep it to a bare minimum of water soiling his clothes. It was beyond awkward to help Oswald under the spray of hot water. Of course, he didn't hold onto him the entire time, just stood ready just in case he would need to catch him. Watching another man shower was really not his favorite thing in the world but at this moment it was his job not only as a cop but simply as a decent human being. He became a cop to help people, first and foremost and if him helping people demanded him to watch another man shower and keep him from falling and cracking his skull open, so be it.

»Just tell me when you’re feeling loopy.« Jim warned Oswald as he leaned against one of the half walls that should serve as a form of partition between the showers to ensure something akin to privacy while Oswald was washing up with the piece of soap Jim had given to him. He did his best to look everywhere but at Oswald, while the young man washed, but Oswald really didn't seem to mind it too much that he was naked in front of Jim. Despite his troubles to keep from falling over, Oswald seemed to enjoy being able to shower and the hot water that was warming up his skin, and Jim much rather would not think about when he had showered last. He was washing his black hair with gusto, almost, happy to get that mess on his head clean at the very least.

Vaguely, Jim heard a door open and close not too far off, probably one of the other officers going to the toilet or ending their shift and changing clothes. He hardly paid the sounds from the locker room any attention at the moment. »Are you starting to feel a bit warmer again?« It was easier to break the awkward silence with talking although a part of him feared that this would make it only more awkward.

»A little.« Oswald nodded quietly and tried a smile as he looked at Jim from underneath that mop of hair.

»Awesome. See? We have you back on your feet in no time, Oswald.« He promised. »Harvey gets you something to wear for now and then we’ll get you patched up and food in that belly, right?«

»Jim that is-« Whatever he wanted to say never made it out of Oswald’s mouth as the door to the shower room was opened and caused them both to turn their heads and see who was intruding - not that it would be too surprising that another cop wanted a shower before heading home. It was this exact moment when several things happened all at once. The door opened and none other than Edward Nygma poked his head into the room, Oswald suddenly grabbed his wrist and right after he had been able to mutter the words »Jim, I’m feeling loopy«, Oswald fell like a sack of potatoes to the ground only to be caught just in time by Jim.

If this day would not turn out to be the weirdest day of his entire life, then Jim Gordon really did not know which would, that was at least what he thought only half an hour later after he had changed into something dry again. Maybe he should have gotten Oswald to the nearest hospital from the start but he knew that there no one would care too much for yet another homeless guy. He felt responsible for Oswald, that was the truth and he wanted this new Oswald to thrive and prove to everyone that this city could turn around too. With a deep groan, Jim finally walked out of Lee’s exam room after she had shooed him out of there to make himself useful instead and organize something warm to eat for her patient. As if his day couldn't get any worse, he stumbled straight into Nygma once more. Well, at least the man had been helpful after Oswald’s little stunt and had not wasted even a second to quickly call for help and yet, as he looked at him now, there was a certain unpleasant twitch to his mouth as he smiled at Jim. »How is Oswald?« Yes, of course, they were friends, weren’t they? Still, the look in Edward’s eyes was starting to seriously creep him out.

»Lee is patching him up right now. He’s awake again and already worrying about who else might have seen him naked, so, I guess, all good.« Jim found himself smirking as he dragged his hand through his hair. »But he got roughed up pretty badly last night and will need a lot of rest. For now, Lee will keep him in her exam room to keep an eye on him until I’m back with something to eat for him, and when my shift is over, I’ll take him home with me until we found a better solution.«

»That's very generous of you, Jim.« His voice was laced with poison. Sure, Edward Nygma always thought that he was the smartest person in the room and that was usually true, but he was wrong if he thought that Jim could not recognize sarcasm or spite directed at his person. On any other given day he would have let this slide too, but today? After all this mess? Oh, hell no.

»What's your problem, Nygma?« Jim finally bit out what he had been thinking for quite a while now. He was starting to get sick and tired of this bullshit and of Nygma staring daggers at him for no particular reason, as it seemed. They had been something akin to friends, last year, but ever since Kristen left town with her ex, Nygma seemed much angrier and saltier than ever before.

»I don't have one.« Edward was quick to reply and since it was not Jim’s wish to argue right in front of Lee’s room, while Oswald was trying to recover from passing out in the shower, Jim nodded and turned away from Ed. »It's just that I am surprised how much you seem to care, all of the sudden. I mean, you and Oswald are not exactly friends, right? Yet, suddenly you seem all too eager to help him to get back on his feet and I wonder why that is.«

If you want a man to talk, all you have to do is ignore him. That was what his father once told him and that was what's still held true even at this moment. Not giving Edward the satisfaction of drilling deeper, made Edward talk on his own. »It's because I am a decent fucking human being and help my fellow men, Nygma, unlike you.«

»And what's that supposed to mean?« Ed hissed, his eyes narrowed as he was looking down his nose at Jim.

»I mean that I thought you guys were friends, Ed. Didn't you tell me the heartwarming story of how you once found him half dead in the snow and took him in to nurse him back to health? I would have expected you to take him in again, to help him to get back on his feet, after you guys were such good friends before his stay at Arkham. Yet, here he is without a roof above his head, with no money, no clothes and no friends, and still you have the audacity to attack me, Ed? At least I'm trying to help.«

Ed’s face looked as if he had bitten into a lemon but he wouldn't be Ed Nygma would he not play this down again. »I will find out what this is all about, Jim, you know puzzles are my speciality and this is just one more puzzle I will solve.«

»Do what you want, Nygma.« He groaned as he shouldered his way past Ed this time. He was tired and just wanted his god damn coffee.

※※※※※※※

They were all so very nice to him here at the precinct. He didn't know how late it was as Lee allowed him to move again but as she did, she walked with him in his new assortment of mismatching clothes from the lost and found storage through the precinct to deliver him to Jim’s desk where he had been allowed to sit down on one of the comfortable leather chairs and had been handed a cup of hot soup to eat. Doctor Thompkins kept reminding him of his fluids for hours now, preaching that he needed to take better care of himself from now on, and Oswald just nodded and smiled. This doctor Thompkins was a saint, truly. Jim couldn't have found a better woman. No matter how much it had originally pained him to see them together. But this was the old Oswald, the one who couldn't accept others to be happy, the one who had been drowning in his own jealousy and thoughts that no one but his mother would ever been able to love him.

»Do you remember anything of what happened, Oz?« Jim asked him finally as Oswald held onto his cup for dear life with a blanket around his shoulders once more. Already, he felt way better than he did in the past weeks.

»I remember … being on the street last night. I … I asked for money and then I met Ed.« Jim rose his brows at this but it was Harvey who interrupted him with a frown and an almost concerned glance at Oswald.

»You met Nygma last night?«

»Yes!« Oswald smiled. »He was so nice to me, he is a really good friend. He gave me money so that I could buy something to eat and I was so happy that he did that for me. I haven't eaten … in a while and the people on the street wouldn't give me anything - understandable, really, by the way I looked, I mean.«

»Why did Nygma not take you home with him? You guys are friends, after all.« Harvey continued with that concerned expression never fading from his face.

»Oh, he said he was busy.« Oswald replied quickly. »That he needed to go back to work soon. So we parted ways and I was so happy about the money that I immediately went to get something to eat but when I walked through that alley to get to the nearest shop, the lights went out.« That was at least how it felt but, of course, he knew that someone must have had attacked him from behind, hitting him over the head with something. »I don't remember anything after that.«

As he ended his little tale his eyes immediately dropped on the steaming hot soup in his hands again, suddenly highly aware of the looks he got from Jim, his partner Harvey and Doctor Thompkins. Surely, they pitied him and the fact how his life had derailed so quickly. A few weeks ago he had everything going for him, after all, with his release from Arkham and this new chance he got and this was how he used that chance. By now, he should have at least found a job and not walk the streets of Gotham and bug the good people of this city for money. He thought about his father and how disappointed he would be would he see him now in this assortment of mismatched clothes, all beaten up and disheveled. This was not how a proper young man was supposed to look like. He felt horrible just thinking about how his father would turn over in his grave at his sight. He had given him a new chance in this life and Oswald had spoiled it.

»I can only assume that … whoever knocked me out took the money Ed gave me.« He mumbled into his bowl, not quite willing to look up. He wouldn't lie when he would say that he still felt like crap and not so much because of his injuries but much more because of the fact that he would not be able to keep his promise to Ed and was, once again, a burden to his good friends at the precinct. They were supposed to be out there saving lives, instead they were here with him now. Everyone else would have just dumped him at the nearest hospital, but not these people. They were real friends and Oswald was glad to have them. »And everything else too, huh?« He tried a nervous little smile as he carefully lifted his eyes from his soup to look at the faces in front of him, darting from Harvey to Lee to Jim. They all looked concerned for him. _Or your mental state_ , as a poisonous little voice in the back of his head quietly offered. »I promised Ed that I would give him back the money he gave me, but I already lost it. I should have been more careful. And now … How am I going to pay him back?«

It was, to everyone’s surprise, Harvey who broke the silence with a gruff little snort once again. »You don't. Simple as that.«

»But-«

»That's what friends are for, Cobblepot. They help each other out without condition. Surely, Ed does not wish you to pay him back or that you torture yourself over a few dollars.« He wanted to protest, but Harvey rose his hand to shut him up right away. »Now eat your soup already before it gets cold and stop beating yourself up for what happened. It's true that the old you would never have gone through what happened to you today and would already be back to terrorizing this city, but you are not that man anymore, right?«

»Professor Strange said that good things happen to good people. I never heard of that before but it must be true, right?«

There was a long moment of silence between his three friends before Lee rose from her spot next to Harvey, stepped around the desk and patted his shoulder. »Of course that's true, Oswald.« She smiled before she gently placed a kiss to his cheek that burned his cold skin almost. »And good things will happen to you. But the thing is that good people have to work a whole lot harder than bad people. You are struggling a bit, that's normal, but you’ll see, we’ll get you through this in no time.«

※※※※※※※

The sound of a fist slamming into the metal door of one of the lockers inside of the locker room seemed to echo through the entire precinct as Ed repeated the action again and again, the image of Oswald in Jim Gordon’s arms never quite leaving him, always hovering right in front of his eyes. He knew that it was dumb and he knew that he had no right being jealous. »True, after all it was you who couldn't be bothered with Oswald just yesterday, right?« He hadn't heard this voice in a while and he would much rather have it stay like this. Still, the other him was hovering always just out of reach in his peripheral. »You were so busy with planning Jim Gordon’s downfall that you rather gave your friend money than to take him home with you, Ed.« His voice was laced with poison and yet that smug grin never left his face as he stared at Ed. Oh, how much he hated this bastard. »You saw that he needed your help, remember? You saw that he needed you, yet, you sent him away and now look what was the result of that. He might as well have been killed, Ed. So no, you do not have any right to be jealous of Jim Gordon. He actually helped Oswald, after all. It's only thanks to him that he’s still alive now. And hell … Here you are claiming to be in love with Oswald, yet you never even visited him in Arkham.«

The worst about the things his Doppelgänger said to him was that it was all true. He claimed that he loved Oswald to himself and fantasized about having him all too himself, to have him writing underneath him in his own bed, to feel his burning hot kisses all over his body, even got jealous just by the way Oswald would look at Jim, and yet he had never been to Arkham to see the man he claimed to love, had not even helped him last night when Oswald had needed him the most. And now he was having petty little fights with Jim over Oswald like some teenage boy whos hormones were going berserk. This couldn't keep happening, Ed decided as he re-adjusted his glasses and shortly leaned his forehead against his locker in front of him to enjoy the cool metal against his burning hot skin. »You need to get a grip, Ed.« He whispered to himself as he squeezed his eyes shut for just another moment.

He needed to make a plan now but before he could make a plan he had to assess his situation and the possibilities he had. So, first things first. What was the situation? Easy. The situation was that Jim Gordon was starting to get suspicious about Kristen’s disappearance and that he possibly already knew that foul play on Ed’s part was involved in this case. So far so good. Now, he could either remain calm and ignore Jim’s remarks that were clearly aimed at getting him riled up so that he would make a mistake that would lead to him giving away what he did, or he could keep pursuing his mission of getting enough dirt on Jim so that Jim would be the one who would end up in Blackgate. Those were the two options he had and usually his choice would be crystal clear after all the information he had been able to gather from Oswald before his friend had been sent to Arkham a few months ago. He had everything he needed to get his master plan going and bring Jim to justice for the murder of Theo Galavan. Yet, Oswald’s return from Arkham had made it all a little more complicated. Then again, had it?

»You can still go forth with your plan.«

»Not as long as Oswald would be around. He wouldn't like that. He would warn Gordon.«

»You don't have to take Oswald with you. You have shown that you don't care about him already. Quit acting as if he would really mean anything to you, Ed. I am you, I know that's not the truth.«

»He called him Oz.« Ed found himself growling. »Unbelievable. _Oz_. As if they were friends. As if he would care. He's just glad that Oswald is not making any problems at the moment. He wouldn't care would Oswald die in the gutter. Just one criminal less in this city, what a beautiful day for Jim Gordon that would be. No. Oswald trusts him and this will be his downfall, I can see it. Sooner or later, Jim sends him back to the streets to fend for himself and then he’ll die.« He shook his head quickly. »No, no I can't let Oswald go with him. It will be his end. And … Surely, Jim is all too eager to turn Oswald against me. He must know that Oswald knows what happened to Kristen. Fuck! Why didn't I think about this sooner! Of course, that's why he wants to ‘help’ Oswald! He wants to further his trust so that he can ask Oswald what truly happened, so that Oswald will tell him! This little weasel.«

»Do you really think Oswald would betray you like this?«

»Haven't you listened to him last time he was at my place? _Violence and anger are not the way to go, Ed_. He knows everything! I told him! The old Oswald … No, he would never have betrayed me, but this new weaker version of him can be twisted and molded and that's exactly what Jim is going to try. I have to get Oswald away from him.«

There was a chuckle coming from his Doppelgänger but he didn't care what he thought to be so funny. Not right now. It was almost the end of Jim’s shift, as a glance at the clock above the door to the men's locker room told him. He better act quickly now. There was no way Oswald would go with Jim. As he straightened his posture, opened his locker and hung his lab coat inside, he caught a glimpse of the mirror on the inside of his locker’s door. He could not forget the way Oswald had looked as he had entered the showers. Beaten black and blue, unable to stand on his own two feet. And last night, as he had seen him on the streets … He should have done something. Yes, this was the truth about this whole situation. He claimed the moral high ground but in the end, he had not helped his friend, he had not helped the man he loved.

Oswald had needed him and he hadn't been there for him. He had ignored him. He had given him money and send him to his doom and despite that, Oswald still regarded him as his friend. A sigh left his lips as he recalled what he had heard earlier. He hadn't been too far away from Jim’s desk as he had delivered a stack of papers to one of the other officers as he had seen Oswald again, sitting at Jim’s desk, huddled in one of the rough blankets that was surely itching his sensitive milk-white skin, a bowl of soup in his slender hands. His voice had been so full of love and admiration as he had talked about his _friend_ Ed and how wonderful he was and how happy Oswald had been about the money.  

How could he still hold him in such high regard? The old Oswald would have cursed him and all his offspring for what he did to him last night. What hellish experiments had they performed on Oswald in Arkham to make him into … this? And what was this thing he claimed to be now even? Was this even Oswald? Was this even a person? It was definitely a new kind of mystery for him to solve and he was good at solving mysteries, right?

With one last little glance at the mirror, Edward straightened the collar of his jacket, took his briefcase out of the locker, closed and locked it and walked out of the locker room, his mission clear in his head at last. As he stepped out of the locker room, his eyes immediately shifted to the gallery where Jim and Harvey had their desks overlooking the rest of the officers of the precinct. Jim’s desk was empty by now. No Oswald sitting around in a blanket. Instead, he found both men already on their way out and quickly rushed over while simultaneously trying not to make it look as if he would rush at all. Harvey could at least have tried to find clothes that matched each other for Oswald, then again, it surely hadn't been easy to find anything that fitted the small man, so he chose to cut Harvey some slack for choosing a mustard colored sweater for Oswald with a green pair of loose fitting pants. He wasn't even wearing two of the same shoes! He was wearing a dress shoe on his left and a sneaker on his right foot. Then again, it was lost and found after all. It was rare that someone would lose both shoes.

»Jim!« He exclaimed as he was only a few feet away and wouldn't have to raise his voice over the hustle and bustle of the precinct too much but Jim had already walked out of the building with Oswald in tow, supporting the smaller man’s weight on his left shoulder as Oswald seemed still not too secure on his own two legs. Jim stopped right outside of the building and turned to look over his shoulder as Ed rushed out after them. He really had to restrain himself from immediately pulling Oswald to his own side. He didn't want to look childish or scare Oswald. The last thing he wanted to do was to fight with Jim over Oswald like a pair of children. »Hey, Jim, where are you going?«

A stupid question and he immediately cursed himself for it. He knew where he was going. Jim knew that he knew where he was going. Only Oswald seemed oblivious to this situation.

»Home.« Jim replied with a bit of confusion tugging at his lips as he spoke. It was cold outside and the sky looked as if the rainstorm from last night had only been a silly little foretaste of what was to come tonight. »Why? Any objections?«

Ed’s eyes shifted from Jim to Oswald and back to Jim. »I just thought … Listen, I apologize how I behaved earlier, Jim, I just was worried for Oswald.« He sighed. He wasn't the best actor and the best liar always told the truth anyway. Jim even looked convinced as he stared back at him clearly a bit uncomfortable to discuss these things right in front of Oswald and right in front of the station too where colleagues might hear them.

»I appreciate that, Ed.« He replied after a moment of hesitation.

»If Oswald is okay with it … I would take him home with me tonight. I mean, I don't wish you and Lee any more inconvenience in this situation and I have the room to help him out, right? We all know I should have done this yesterday already.« He should have done this a few weeks ago as Oswald had been in his apartment tarred and feathered after visiting Butch and Tabitha. Oswald’s face lit up at his words as he looked up at Edward. This new Oswald prompted everyone to talk over him like over a child like he wasn't part of the conversation, so it really wasn't that big of a surprise that Oswald looked at Jim first before coming to a conclusion himself.

Of course, Ed had chosen his words wisely because he knew that the sheer mention of being an inconvenience to anyone was enough to get Oswald on his side right away. »If Oswald wants to go with you, I have no problem with that. I just thought it would be wise to have him in the close proximity of an actual physician, Ed.« Oh, there was it again, these cleverly crafted insults Jim liked to use on him to injure his ego.

»I understand that.« Ed remained calm, or at least he tried to. »But I think I can handle it. I nursed him back to health once, I can do it again and if I need help, I’ll call Doctor Thompkins right away.« It felt incredibly odd to discuss Oswald like he wasn't there like he had no say in this matter. The old Oswald would have never accepted that. He would have already threatened them with a knife or whatever he would get his hands on first.

»I would like to go with Ed.« Oswald finally took a position in this whole ordeal and immediately smiled apologetically at Jim. »I am very grateful for what you did for me, Jim, but I think Ed is right. I don't wish to be of further inconvenience to you and Miss Thompkins.«

»You are nothing of that sort, Oz.« He replied. »But if that is your wish, you are a free man.« Jim then added with a smile and patted Oswald's shoulder. »Just let me drive you guys to Nygma’s place then. I know he has come by foot today, right Ed?«

»That would be very nice, thank you Jim.« And yet it felt like being doused in cold water at Jim’s words. He knew too much about him. It was probably ridiculous to assume that Jim knew too much just by this observation the detective made, after all, it was common knowledge that Edward liked to walk to work and back most days, and yet it left a sour taste in his mouth all the way from the precinct to his apartment in Jim’s car. The only reason he had allowed Jim to drive them was Oswald anyway. There was no way he could make it that far on his own two feet and the more considerate part of his brain just wanted Oswald to be safe and warm at the moment to make up for what he did wrong last time Oswald had needed his help. He felt like crap just thinking about how he had sent him away in his hour of need now that they made their way back to his apartment.

»This really … It is too kind of you, Edward.« Oswald mumbled with a timid smile as Edward finally closed the heavy door behind him to lock it for the night. »But I can assure you it wasn’t necessary, I don't want to be a burden.«

»No, it wouldn't have been necessary had I not kicked you out the first time you came to me for help, Oswald.« He replied as he hung his jacket on his coat rag and took off his shoes shortly thereafter to get comfortable. He should probably start to prepare dinner, after all, Oswald did not seem to have eaten much these past weeks. Had he lived on the streets for four weeks already? Had no one been willing to take him in? It wouldn't surprise him to hear that this was the case. Oswald had always been subjected to the misconception that his crew respected him, while this couldn't have been any farther from the truth. Not one of these petty criminals had ever respected him. They had feared him and now that he didn't possess any power and was pretty much useless to them, they had no reason to fear him, let alone help him. He would lie would he claim that he couldn't understand that either.

All those people saw in Oswald was a weird little freak, too weak to protect himself, too crazy to turn their backs to. They never saw his brilliance and now there seemed not much left of his brilliance anyway.

Already Oswald tried to brush off his words with a shy little smile on his lips and those bright blue eyes staring back at him as if he had hung the sun and the moon in the sky. »I should have never sent you away, Oswald. We are friends and I was a lousy friend that day.«

»But if you wouldn't have sent me away, I would have never met my father.« Oswald finally smiled and followed Edward through the apartment like a duckling instead of taking the pressure of his bad limb and sit down on the sofa.

»You met your father?« That really was a surprise and as Ed turned to look at Oswald this time, there was the briefest moment when something but this fake happiness crossed over Oswald’s face but the moment was over too quickly for Edward to name that expression that he had seen brushing over Oswald’s pale face.

»Yes, I met him at my mother’s gravesite.« Oswald smiled yet again and for some reason, Edward felt the urge to caress his cheeks by the way he looked at him now. It was not at all like the old Oswald had looked at him. It was a look of pure admiration and almost too precious not to touch him. In fact, Edward caught himself just in time as he was already reaching out to him and cleared his throat turning his back to Oswald so he could face the fridge.

»Why aren’t you with him anymore?«

»He died a few weeks ago.« It was all but a whisper as he said it now and Edward could almost feel the heartache this had caused his friend. Wasn't fate a cruel bitch? There, finally after thirty-one years, Oswald met his father and then the poor devil dies right away. It wasn't fair.

»I'm sorry to hear that.« Edward replied quietly before he nodded to the bed. »Oswald, please, you should rest. I’ll wake you when dinner is ready, just like in the old times, right?« Oswald huffed a smile in response as Ed looked over his shoulder before the young man started hobbling towards the bed on the other side of the tiny apartment. It was only a few moments later that Edward found the strength in himself to turn away from his work to look at the bed. Oswald lay curled in on himself on top of the blankets, already fast asleep. He would never grow tired of seeing Oswald in his bed and with a little luck, maybe he would be able to keep him there forever. All it would take for this to come true was to get rid of Jim Gordon.

 

**-End of Chapter 5-**


	6. Chapter 6

His world was dark and filled with the terrified screams of the other unfortunate souls that were populating these hallways. He could hear them inside of their cells all around him. Screaming. Crying. Mumbling. The mumbling was the worst. It made him sick. He could hear them scratching at the walls and at the insides of his skull and it just never stopped, never leaving him alone, never allowing him to forget or find peace in his own mind. The screaming never ceased, tales of remorse and suffering too horrible to truly comprehend poisoning his mind with each passing hour. There wasn't much he could distinctly remember of those nights, but he could recall the smells and the sounds better than anything else. It had smelled like piss and shit, like blood, like sweat and like pure and utter animalistic terror, making it almost impossible to breathe. The nights within the confinements of the old Arkham Asylum were pure hell and every night he delved in deeper, each night one level further down until he would reach the ninth level and succumb to his demons’ treachery once and for all.

The door to his room was opened from the outside and allowed light to stream into his pitch black room as Oswald cowered in the corner of his bed, his knees raised to his chin, hugging them with his slender arms so tightly that he almost lost feeling in all four extremities from the sheer force of the instinct to protect himself that even now refused to leave him. His entire body trembled, making his bed vibrate and creak under the panic that was radiating from him and although he did not wish to look at the door in fear of the monsters he would then get to see, he couldn't tear his eyes off the door either. His eyes were glued to the door and the bright fluorescent light streaming - bleeding - from the hallway into his room like the light from the moon outside.

There was no way out. He wanted to hide under his bed, but he knew that it wouldn't matter. The monsters had already seen him and they would come to tear him apart limb by limb like they did every night. They would push him down and they would take what they wanted as they always did. It served him right, he supposed. Those monsters were nothing more than echoes of his violent past, after all, and yet, as they came through the door, large and completely black with distorted faces like molten steel, he screamed in panic, screamed even louder as they lunged at him and tore at his arms. He screamed and kicked and struggled as the monsters were dragging him from the bed, not a care in the world for Oswald slamming into the ground because of it, and he never stopped screaming and kicking and pleading as they pulled him further, dragging his body over the cold tiles of the asylum, out of his door and into the mouth of the beast.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Edward Nygma's apartment**

Ed was awoken by screams of pure and utter terror that night. At first, after he bolted upright on the sofa in his one-room apartment, he wasn't even able to connect the sound of screaming ripping through the night to anything at all. His first thoughts were that the screams must come from outside, some poor guy who was murdered gruesomely in the streets, perhaps, but it took him only a brief moment longer to realize that the screaming echoed from his own apartment walls.

»Oswald?« His mouth was still half asleep but his brain on high alert as he jumped from the sofa where he had been sleeping on after Oswald had fallen asleep in his bed again right after dinner, exhausted by the day’s events. Of course, he had demanded that Oswald would take the bed due to his injuries. What friend would he be to force his injured friend to sleep on his old uncomfortable sofa? Well, then, of course, his motives had not been this noble and compassionate at all - at least not as he claimed them to be. No, if he ever wanted a chance against Jim Gordon in the run for Oswald’s heart, he needed to be chivalrous because Oswald had been raised the old-fashioned way and to him, chivalry and good manners were very important.

Inside his apartment, there was always this green-ish half-light that tinted everything he owned in a rich emerald tone. He had come to love this color pretty early on in his life and now it filled his entire home. He had not many fond memories of his own mother, but in the ones he did have, she had worn an emerald-colored summer dress that had been softly flowing in the summer breeze and he had loved it. Back then his mother had been the prettiest woman in the world to him and he had loved her with all his heart - until she hadn't met him with the same feeling anymore.

As he now turned to look at the bed, he could see Oswald writhing in the sheets and certainly not in the way he would like to see. Even from afar he could see the sweat glistening on his forehead, could almost count every beat of sweat running out of his black hair and down his temples. He was kicking and screaming as if he was being tortured and for a sick short moment, Ed realized that this was exactly what was happening. Oswald was tortured. His own mind was hurting him and from experience, he could tell that this was often so much worse than physical trauma could ever be. One’s mind had the ability to torture it's owner with a thousand daggers each second.

He hurried over to the bed without wasting any more precious seconds, mindful to not trip over the pants of his pajamas and disregarding his glasses that were lying on the small table beside his sofa. He had given Oswald his spare pair of pajamas to put on earlier, now it seemed that pajama needed a wash so drenched in sweat it seemed to be. Well, that could be taken care of later, he assumed. »Oswald!« He tried again a little more firm and louder but still, Oswald did not wake from his nightmare as if, whoever was torturing him behind those closed eyelids, held him in a tight grip, not allowing Oswald to escape. Only as Edward finally sat down on the edge of the bed, drawing his left leg onto the mattress so that he could restrain Oswald if needed, he placed his hands on his shoulders and tried shaking him awake now instead.

Oswald awoke at once at that, all but shooting up and clutching the nearest object in front of him, which so happened to be Ed at this moment. Not that he would complain. Before he knew it, Ed had wrapped his arms around Oswald  tightly, his left hand securely on his upper back right underneath his shoulder blades, the right on the back of Oswald’s messy head to pull him in a little more and all but force Oswald to rest with his head against Edward's collarbone, his head tucked in beneath Ed’s chin like that. He knew from experience that it would probably help the former Penguin to calm down would he just hear Ed’s heartbeat over the sounds of his own ragged breathing and the rush of his own blood through his veins. Edward could almost feel the panic that was radiating from Oswald now and it made him sick to think that had happened to him to cause this extreme reaction and terror.

It was more than a simple nightmare, at least to Ed this was pretty clear now and for the first time in a long while, he felt the desire to make whoever was responsible pay for what happened to the kingpin of the underworld. He missed Oswald's power and he missed his vigor, that much was true, but this right here, holding this tortured man in his arms and feeling his entire body spasm under fits of sobs now, pulled something else inside of Ed to the surface. Something he could not quite name yet.

»It was just a dream.« Edward found himself breathing into Oswald’s hair as he combed his fingers through it softly. The gesture was entirely too intimate for a friend, yet Oswald did not seem to mind, nor seemed he freaked out by it at all while Edward, in a sick and twisted way, enjoyed holding Oswald so close to him now. He enjoyed feeling his breath going still too rapidly against the skin of his collarbones, he enjoyed feeling the shivers running through Oswald’s body as he was melting into the embrace so willingly, so trusting that it almost scared Ed a little.

He couldn't help but wonder if Oswald would react to Jim in that same way. Would he melt into Jim just as willingly? Would he maybe scoot even closer in search of his warmth? It was not a secret that Jim Gordon with all his training and experience was a lot more desirable than Edward ever could be. He was strong and vicious and probably rough with his lovers and he could see Oswald enjoying that, but could Oswald not see that Jim Gordon would never quite look at Oswald the same way he did? Jim Gordon would never quite see the beauty that Oswald possessed in his delicate features and his lily-white skin. But he, Edward Nygma, did and it made him sick that Oswald still would only look at Gordon in times of need.

 _That's not true and you know it_ , the poisonous little voice in his head reminded him yet again of the day Oswald had been in this flat the last time, so obviously in search for help from Edward. No wonder he would run into Jim Gordon’s arms after he had sent him away. »Just a nightmare.« He continued to croon into the mop of black hair that really was in desperate need of a cut. »You are safe now. You are with me now. Nothing can hurt you now.«  But nothing he said could really calm Oswald down as it seemed. He kept sobbing into his pajama top and his body was still shaking violently. Through the fabric of the pajama top on Oswald’s back he could feel the wetness on his skin. He would be cold soon would he stay in these clothes now. » _The fire’s gone out wet from snow above, but nothing will warm me more than my, my mother’s love._ « Maybe it was pathetic that Ed used singing this song as his last resort to calm Oswald down, but it seemed to work anyhow and that was all he really cared for now. It only took the first few words of the song for Oswald’s trembling to seize dramatically and as he decided to keep on going, the sobs were soon to die off as well. » _I light another candle, dry the tears from my face. Nothing can protect me more than my mother's warm embrace._ «

He stopped only as he noticed how even Oswald’s breathing had started to even out a bit again and only then he pulled away from Oswald a little, but still kept him close enough for now, close enough so that Oswald would still be safe and warm in his arms, whether this might be weird for a friend to do or not - he didn't care. As he put his hand on Oswald’s forehead next, he almost flinched away. His skin was wet and clammy and definitely too cold. »Oswald … You should really take a hot bath now. Your temperature is much too low and you will get sick if you stay in these sweaty clothes.«

If Oswald had heard him, he didn't show it to Ed as he was just staring blankly ahead now at this moment, apparently unable to process the reality of what was happening around him at all. »Just … stay, okay? I’ll go run you a bath.« And he did. Without further ado, Edward had risen from his spot on the bed and left Oswald to his own devices for a moment, while he dove into the bathroom and quickly took care of the bathwater. It didn't take long until he returned to Oswald and found him still sitting on the bed as he had left him but at least he seemed a little more responsive now. »Oswald, the bath is ready. Do you need any help?«

A nod. At least a nod.

That was enough to make him go over to the bed and help Oswald up. He immediately pulled Oswald’s left arm around his shoulders to help him rise to his naked feet and lead him into the bathroom slowly, always mindful of his injuries. Inside the bathroom, he helped him to sit down on the closed toilet lid first and immediately started to work open the buttons of the pajama shirt but was suddenly met with new found energy from Oswald as the smaller man suddenly and very violently flinched away from his touch.

The way he suddenly curled in on himself, not willing to let himself get touched by Edward made his heart ache and his stomach drop for he didn't wish to think about the possibilities of the meaning behind his reaction as of now. What had they done to him in Arkham and why did he react like this now? Another mystery to be solved by none other than Edward Nygma, that much was certain and he would all too gladly indulge in it too.

»Oswald … Hey, it's me, Ed.« He tried again to make contact with him as he gently, carefully put a hand on his left knee, mindful of his right leg and though Oswald flinched yet again, he at least looked at Ed again as he was now kneeling right in front of him. »I’m not going to hurt you, Oswald. You know I would never hurt you.« A nod again but still no words could escape Oswald's probably very sore throat. He seemed either unable or unwilling to speak and he couldn't blame him for that either. Since nice words didn't help completely to remove him from his trance, Edward decided to use a different approach as he gently dug his fingers into Oswald's left knee. »Feel that, Oswald? That's reality, that's me. You are no longer in Arkham. You are with me now and I take care of you. With me you are safe.«

Not with Gordon nor anyone else. Maybe his obsession was borderline unhealthy yet again, same as it had been with Kristen. He couldn't have it end the same way, though, with his hands wrapped around Oswald's beautiful throat. He would never come back from this, he would never be able to live through something like that and he wouldn't want to anyway. The old Oswald … He would have never thought that him ending like Kristen would ever be even the slightest possibility but this Oswald right here … It would be so easy to wrap his hands around his slim neck.

Finally, Oswald’s eyes met his and for once after he had woken up, he seemed to be with him again, relaxing his posture ever so slightly and this awful anxious looking default smile starting to creep back onto his face. »Come on, we get you into the tub, right?« This time he was not met with any kind of resistance from his houseguest as he helped to undress Oswald. Up close, the state of his body was even worse than he had previously imagined it to be. Whoever had attacked Oswald had done quite the job on him and Edward would not rest until he found and killed those responsible for it.

He helped Oswald into the bathtub only a few short moments after that whole ordeal and neither of them was in any way concerned by Oswald's nudity. He had seen him naked before, after all, last time Oswald had stayed here to find help and care in Edward’s hands, Edward had needed to undress him too. As Oswald had settled down in the hot water, a relieved sigh escaped his sore throat and Edward found himself smiling at the sound. »I’m going to throw those pajamas into the washing machine and look for something else you could wear for tonight.« Edward announced but Oswald's voice caught him off guard as he already turned away to leave the bathroom.

»Stay, please.« His voice was hoarse and incredibly tiny for a man with a presence as Oswald’s. As he turned around to look at Oswald again, he could feel the little smile that was tugging on the corners of his mouth again and so, without resistance, he walked over to Oswald again, only to sit down heavily on the laundry bin beside the tub. He wasn't even wearing his glasses, but to his luck, he didn't really need them right now anyway.

There was silence for a moment after Edward had followed Oswald’s wish. A moment in which Edward tried to wrap his head around how he would ever manage to confess his love to Oswald if he would ever do it, that was. And could he do it? Could he look at this man with the face of the man he loved and yet not being that man, and tell him that he loved him in all honesty? This was, after all, only a copy of the Oswald he loved, not the real deal. Yet it was Oswald. His Oswald. And his Oswald needed a haircut. His Oswald would not want to be seen dead with hair like this. He was gentle as he brushed a few strands of his outgrown bangs back and out of Oswald's face with a small smirk to lighten the mood.

»We should really cut your hair tomorrow.« He smiled and for once he got a smile in return and a genuine even, not that fabricated, false one that Oswald used to smile since he came back from Arkham.

»I'm so sorry that I woke you up, Ed.« Oswald finally rose his voice to him quietly. »You need to get up early and go to work and here am I keeping you up all night … I’m sorry that I’m that much of a burden.«

»You could never be a burden to me, Oswald.« _I love you_ , those words burned through his mind and he was almost incapable of keeping them there. It wasn't as if he would be a coward. He had been brave enough to ask Miss Kringle out, after all, and yet he knew that he would never have a chance with Oswald as long as Jim Gordon was someone to be reckoned with too. Oh, how much he hated this asshat! »Did you dream about Arkham?«

»I guess so, yes…« He mumbled quietly. »I don't remember. I … I don't remember much about Arkham anyway. I mean … I remember the days and the group therapy and the art therapy and all of the conversations with Professor Strange - _Hugo_ \- but there is something else that I don't quite remember. It always happened at night. I know that they took me at night and brought me somewhere deep in the bowels of the hospital, but I can't remember what happened.« Even the attempt of remembering it, seemed to cause him pain judging by how his face contorted before it found its way back to that awful pleasant smile. He was so helpless in this state he was in. A welcome victim for every predator of this city - and there were many predators in Gotham.

»What do you remember?« He urged gently and took it upon himself to start washing Oswald’s hair at least, massaging his fingers through his scalp as he distributed his favorite shampoo, thrilled that Oswald's hair would smell like green apple later. It was much softer under his fingers than he would have expected.

»I remember … pain.« He whispered quietly but closed his eyes in relaxation under Edward’s skilled fingers. How much would he give to be allowed in the bathtub with him right now. How much would he give to sit down behind Oswald, close his arms around him tightly and just try to make it all a little bit better for him. Of course, he couldn't do that. »I remember something being put on my head. I don't - I don't want to think about it.«

»You don't have to.« Even though he would honestly want to know what torture strange had used on him to change his personality like that. He would bleed just for causing Oswald so much trauma and pain, at least if Edward would get his hands on him. Maybe for once, he could work with Jim on this. Would he ask him for help and tell him what Oswald had told him, maybe Jim would be willing to investigate that mad scientist. His plan of sending him to Blackgate could wait. »What about your family? What happened there?« He had only told him a little bit of it during dinner and mainly how he had met his father and what a kind man Elijah Van Dahl had been before his untimely death, with Edward cleverly remarking that Oswald should add Dutch to his abilities now that he knew where his father’s family came from.

»I … Father died.« Oswald replied quietly. »His heart. He was sick. It happened very suddenly. In fact, we were in the middle of a conversation as it happened. We had just talked about our family and how I would inherit everything from him, that he wanted to call his lawyer over the next day to set it in stone. Maybe it was the excitement of this new situation, who knows? Maybe it was my fault and all the things he had to learn about me before his death. After his funeral … Grace, my stepmother, didn't wish me to stay. She had learned about my past and was greatly concerned over my presence at the house. Understandably so, of course. I asked her to stay but she wouldn't let me. Of course, she has to protect her children, first and foremost, my mother would have done the same thing.«

»And that was when?«

»Three weeks ago.«

»And since then you lived on the streets?« A small nod adorned with that sweet smile again. »Oswald … Why didn't you come to me?«

»I just thought … after what you said last time … I didn't want to unsettle you.« Of course, he would not want to do that after how he had treated him before. Of course, Oswald would rather live on the dirty and dangerous streets of Gotham than coming to the man who had sent him away. This new Oswald would never admit to his true feelings of resentment towards him. The real Oswald would have never looked at him again and probably kicked his ass for what he did.

»I'm sorry for what I said.« Edward found himself sighing as he met Oswald’s clear blue eyes again. Even his eyes looked so much different than the old Oswald’s eyes did.

»Don't be. It was just honest.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

He had thought that walking into the precinct would feel much easier now that he was no longer a _persona non grata_ but that was not the case. In fact, he had felt much more at ease back when he had still been the Penguin. Then again, he had always been overly cocky anyway. Although he didn't want to think about it, he had a hard time forgetting what happened to him ever since he walked out of Arkham. Good things happened to good people but when? Maybe he was not yet good enough. He felt uneasy walking the streets alone these days. There were shadows behind every corner, no matter where he turned to next. Oswald couldn't remember that he would have ever felt this vulnerable in his past life as the Penguin. On the other hand, he never had reason to feel this way as the Penguin. Not with bodyguards in his back who would have shot anyone in plain daylight had he demanded it, not with all this raw power he had possessed. No one would have dared to mess with him back then and he, most certainly, would not have been ambushed, stripped, robbed and beaten in some dirty alleyway.

Over a week had passed ever since that incident in the streets of Gotham and he had flourished under Edward’s care just like the first time around. But he had never once left the apartment during this time and as the call from Ed came to have lunch together at the GCPD, he had been afraid. Yes, that was the truth. Edward’s enthusiasm had rubbed off on him easily, though, and he didn't wish to disappoint his friend after everything that he had done for him these past days. That was why he had forced himself to leave the apartment and walk the two blocks down to the GCPD. He couldn't keep himself from flinching every time something startled him. Walking these once beloved and familiar streets was now like walking an obstacle parkour. Everyone he met seemed to look at him with hungry eyes and ready to strike him down, yet he forced himself onwards and as the GCPD precinct in central Gotham came into sight, he was almost running at that point.

 _I would really like to get my hands on the bastards who mugged me and rip their heads clean off._ The voice in the back of his head startled him almost more than the door of the precinct flying open with two cops filing out talking to each other. As quick as the thought had entered his mind, as quickly was it gone and only left him with the sensation of discomfort and a sharp pain zipping through his head like electroshocks. He found himself almost stumbling from the sensation and had no chance but to sit down on the steps leading up to the precinct heavily, drawing the attention of the two officers towards him as he clasped his head. He felt violently ill, almost as if he would throw up any second now from the sudden pain that had hit him square in the head.

»Sir?« One of the cops, a young red-headed guy whom he had seen a few times already when he came to the precinct in the past, asked. Oswald was not even able to put a name on him. »Are you alright?« If he had not recognized Oswald, his partner sure had.

»Josh, come on man, that's Penguin, don't even talk to him or he might slit your throat on the spot.«

»Nygma.« Oswald managed to get out before a new surge of hot white pain shot through his head that caused him to dig his fingertips into his scalp. »Nygma. I’m here for Nygma.«

»Oswald?« He recognized that voice immediately and regretted the decision of looking up just as instantly. His vision was blurry, his head swimming, but he could see Jim and Harvey as they walked down the stairs, probably on their way to get lunch or to a case. Even Harvey Bullock’s grim face was suddenly like a ray of pure sunshine on Oswald’s face. Jim was at his side so quickly that Oswald had a hard time realizing that he had moved at all and was almost startled by Jim’s presence by his side. »Is everything alright?«

Nothing was alright and his head was spinning, an awful beeping sound ringing in his ears. »I just … it's nothing, just a headache.« He replied swiftly although he knew that neither Jim nor Harvey would probably believe him. It really wasn't that much of a surprise anyway. »I wanted to see Ed.«

»Well, then we are going to bring you to Ed, right Harv?« The older detective only groaned his response and once more Oswald had to be helped back to his feet so that he was finally able to stand upright again and climb these treacherous stairs. Only after he got moving again his head stopped hurting and so, at the doors to the precinct, he bid Jim farewell after thanking him for his help. He could only hope that he would not get to experience another attack like this one. A part of his mind tried to stay oblivious to what had caused the attack but the more rational part of his mind knew that the attack had hit him after he had these poisonous little thoughts echoing through his mind. It was as if his own mind was slowly becoming his worst enemy.

»Oswald!« Edward’s voice sounded over the hustle and bustle of the police station. »There you are!« Seeing Ed smile so brightly at him through the room actually made his previous attack seem like nothing all of the sudden. They had grown quite a lot closer over the course of these past days and yet he could still feel how reluctant Ed seemed to be towards him. To Ed, it seemed to be a problem that Oswald was no longer the Penguin but just a normal young man who did not wish to indulge in the same activities as before. Of course, he was not happy that Ed was trying to get Jim busted for the murder of Theo Galavan but it was not his place to critique him on that either.

Every time he walked into the precinct, it seemed as if the room grew particularly more quiet and Oswald grew more and more aware of the suspicious looks he got as he hobbled further into the station just as Ed was crossing the room to meet him halfway.

»You look pale, is everything alright?«

»Just a headache.« Oswald shrugged it off quickly once again as he had done with Jim too. No need to worry his friends. Just because he wasn't the old Oswald anymore, it didn't mean that he was completely helpless and dependable of his friends. He still knew his way around, it was just a whole lot more difficult. »It's already better.« He smiled at Ed in a sorry attempt to reassure him.

Ed seemed not fully convinced, yet he nodded and led Oswald through the room and back to his office to the side of the main room and Oswald followed as quickly as he could, casting a glance over the desks they were passing and the other officers roaming the precinct. _They are all so pitiful_ , the voice in the back of his head sounded again but this time it didn't bring him pain, at least not as much as before, it only left him uneasy. _Like cockroaches_. »Officer Alvarez should really be a bit more careful with his affair. If he continues it the way he does at the moment, his wife will soon find out.«

For a short moment, Oswald didn't even know who was more surprised over his words, him or Ed, but it was Ed who caught up with the situation first as he almost choked on the spit in his mouth, closing the door to his office behind himself after Oswald stepped inside first. »Alvarez has an affair?« His breath quickened visibly and he seemed excited about this new knowledge that he would, without a doubt, use against Alvarez.

»Yes … You didn't know?«

»How do _you_ know?«

»It's obvious, isn't it?« It had only taken him one look at Alvarez just now to know. It was maybe a bit of the Penguin’s sharp eye that was still left in him. »You just have to look at how he behaves around his partner, Miss McKenzie to realize that they are having an affair and I couldn't help but notice the wedding band Alvarez is wearing, unlike Miss McKenzie. Plus, there was a tiny bit of lipstick on his collar, though it looked like he has tried to clean it off earlier in the day.«

Ed looked at him in awe for a moment before a laugh left his throat and he hurried to take a seat at his desk. He had already gotten them something to eat while Oswald had been on his way over and he couldn't help but found himself smiling at Ed’s reaction to these new findings. »What other delicious gossips can you tell me about my colleagues?«

Of course, gossiping was not very nice and it was something the old Oswald would have enjoyed much more than he did now, yet he was glad to tell Edward about all the little details he had seen in the behavior of his various coworkers last time he had spent a few hours at this place. Not to mention that he was acutely aware of how much Edward enjoyed getting all of this new information on his colleagues that he could use to blackmail them in the future. Every now and again, when their eyes would meet, he noticed something else in his friend’s face that he couldn't quite name yet. It wasn't unsettling per se, but it was definitely something that left him wondering what was going on behind this forehead. It was nothing really, only a certain gleam in Edward’s eyes and not because of the information he had gotten either. No, it reminded him of how Edward had once looked at him in his dingy apartment as Oswald had asked about one Mr. Leonard.

※※※※※※※

As the day ended, Edward found a new spring in his step walking through the precinct and looking at his colleagues. It was, suddenly, as if their masks had all fallen to the ground and now he could see clearly the depravity behind those faces which he only had expected to someday see before today. But it wasn’t so much the fact that he now knew more about those people around him than ever before that made him almost giddy as he was getting ready to leave for the night, it was a whole other thing that he himself had realized and observed throughout the day, something that not even Oswald had been able to notice despite his sharp eyes and wits.

The Penguin was still in there.

Whatever Strange did to Oswald, it was not permanent - at least it wouldn't have to be. This new, softer, sweeter, gentler Oswald, was nothing more than a charade, a fake personality that had been put in front of his real self. A mask that he was unable, maybe even unwilling, to take off but the real Oswald was still in there and today he caught the first glimpse of this Oswald in a long while.

Before he left, his eye fell upon Jim at his desk again and he decided that he would not leave the precinct without talking to him about Strange. Jim was alone at the moment, night had already fallen over Gotham, but it was still relatively early in the evening. Oswald had walked home on his own after eating lunch with Ed in his office earlier and Edward was still reminiscing about just how natural this all had felt. Spending time with Oswald, having him come over for lunch, knowing that he would wait for him at home when Edward would return in a bit, having dinner with him, talking, hearing his deep breathing when he would later fall asleep. It was very _coupley_ how that all felt, except that they were not a couple and, as Edward was always highly aware of, they would probably never be. Of course, he would like it to be different, but he also knew that Oswald had only eyes for Jim and he was not yet dumb enough to risk his friendship with Oswald like this, especially not in the delicate state Oswald was in at the moment. He couldn't even say if he would want this version of Oswald. He was still beautiful, he still possessed some of the attributes he had fallen for from the start, but he just wasn't the man he had fallen in love with - not strictly speaking, at least. That didn't change anything about how fast his heart would beat when Oswald would lean in close to him when they would sit on the sofa and watch TV in the evening.

»Hey, Jim, do you have a minute?« Edward announced his presence as he walked up the steps to the balcony that was overlooking the lower level of the station and was met with tired blue eyes as Jim looked up from the file he had in front of him. Some minor drug-related case, nothing too special and while Harvey seemed glad to have something easy for once, Jim seemed already bored out of his mind.

»Sure thing, what's up, Ed?« He tried to sound friendly but Ed could still hear this certain hostility in his voice that he knew so well by now from most people around him. Jim didn't trust him - rightfully so - and he was probably still trying to find out what happened to Kristen. There was a moment of awkward silence between them, but then Ed dragged Harvey’s chair over to Jim's desk and sat down heavily only to lean in a little closer to properly convey the seriousness and secrecy of his request.

»Jim … I know you are quite busy, but, I wondered if you would be able to look into this Professor Strange a bit more.«

»What do you mean?« His interest was peaked as was clear by the way Jim shifted in his seat - not leaning closer, but a bit farther away from Ed instead as to look at him more closely now like a hawk that had found its prey.

»I mean … Let's be honest here, Jim, we’ve all seen Oswald, right? We've all seen how different he is now.«

»He is sane now, Ed. That's a good thing.« But his tone of voice told Ed already that Jim didn't really believe what he was saying. He almost had him. Now all he needed to do was pushing the right buttons and, thankfully, Ed was quite good in pushing buttons.

»It is, of course, I agree with you on that.« Ed quickly replied with a sincere expression on his face that he had practiced quite a bit in front of the mirror in the past. »Or … It would be, if it would be real, Jim. Look, I know that you are glad that Oswald is … reformed now, a new man, rehabilitated, good even. And I am the last person who would want him to go back to his old ways. I like the new Oswald as much as the next guy, but the thing that concerns me is that Hugo Strange managed to rehabilitate Oswald through torture, Jim. I know that sounds far-fetched, maybe paranoid, but I have reason to believe that this is indeed true, that Hugo Strange in fact tortured Oswald to get this kind of result. No one makes a 180-degree turn like Oswald did just by talking with some therapist and a few drugs, not permanently, at least - not in such short a time.«

Jim’s forehead was torn apart by deep wrinkles now as he finally broke their eye contact to glance at his desk with the open file, not really seeing it but lost in thought, as he was scratching his chin now. »But you don't have proof?« He almost sounded hopeful.

»No, of course not.« Ed sighed. »That's why I need you to investigate Arkham and Strange. Listen, I spend a lot of time with Oswald these days. He wakes up screaming almost every night from nightmares about Arkham but when I ask him, he can’t remember a thing. He says that he knows that they did something to him at night, that they dragged him out of his cell at night, but he doesn't remember what happened then. Maybe he repressed those memories, maybe it has something to do with the therapy itself that he can’t remember. Whatever it was, Jim, this can’t be happening, don't you agree? Even if it helps people to suppress their real self and fit into society, such means can never be achieved through torture, right? You are a good man, Jim, much better than anyone in this station, surely you agree with me on that one. The patients in Arkham might be insane, criminals even, but they are still human beings and they still have rights and torture is prohibited by law. Plus … if the patients, like Oswald, really get brainwashed by torture and get released back into society, do you really think that this will hold up forever? At some point they will start to crack and maybe they will be worse than ever before then.«

»Did Oswald do anything to bring you to that conclusion?«

»It's just … Sometimes I see glimpses of the old Oswald, you know? Don't worry, he never did anything that the old Oswald would have done, but I see that he’s still in there and I know that he will burst through at one point.« He could only hope this would be the case. »But this new Oswald, Jim … He will never survive in this city on his own. Not like this. You’ve seen what those thugs did to him the other night! Isn't it worse if Strange would release a whole bunch of people like Oswald into the streets of Gotham like this? This city is eating the weak for breakfast, Jim.«

Jim rose his hand to shut him up at this point and though he should feel affronted, he knew he had won. He could tell by Jim’s expression and the way he wouldn't look at him but massage his bottom lip between his thumb and index finger. »You know Oswald much better than I do, I guess.« Jim sighed. »Okay, listen, Ed. I think you are right. If - and that's a big if - Strange is using torture to brainwash his patients, I agree with you. Something like this can't happen, no matter if he is successful with his methods or not. He will have to achieve his success without torturing his patients in any which way. I will look into this, but I can't promise anything. I'm not gonna lie to you, Ed, I can't stand that sleazy weasel either. When I was at Arkham the night Oswald was released, he was … I don't know, I just didn't feel comfortable around this man. I agree with you that he’s hiding something and to him, Oswald is probably only one of his many experiments. I would actually be quite glad to get this man behind bars, if only because he put Oswald in harm’s way that night as he let one of his patients beat him up over a bit of ice cream.«

Edward found it in himself to genuinely smile at Jim this time as he slowly rose from Bullock’s chair again. »Thank you, very much, Jim.«

»I didn't do anything yet.«

»No, but you listened to me. No one ever listens to weird ol’ Ed, right?«

»We’re friends, Ed. Of course, I listen. Of course, I take you serious.«

»Thanks Jim, that means a lot.« Jim smiled back at him as Edward was pushing the chair at it's rightful place again and turned to leave.

»Oh, Ed! Almost forgot!« He turned around yet again. »Harvey had an idea. You remember Georgie?«

»You mean our old errand boy?« He rose his brows as he thought back to Georgie, some college kid that spend his summers running errands for the cops of the GCPD until his graduation a few months ago.

»Exactly! Harvey thought that, if Oswald would like it, he could do the same thing. Work as an errand boy for the GCPD, I mean. I know it's not much he would get for the job, but it would be a start at least, to help him get back on his feet.« That would entail that he would see Oswald even more than he already did. Oswald would be here all the time, pretty much. Maybe he would be able to pick up on even more and even juicer secrets that Ed could use against his colleagues, including Saint Gordon himself. He would not give up on his plan of putting Jim behind bars before he could be found out for Kristen’s murder by him, but he postponed his plan until he had the old Oswald back.

»That's actually a nice idea.« Ed replied with a grin. »I'm going to ask him later.« Again, he turned to leave and again it was Jim who kept him from leaving once more.

»And Ed?« As he looked over his shoulder at Jim now, he knew that he would hate what Jim had to say and thusly forced his face into a pleasant smile again. »I know a breakup is jarring and especially after how Kristen dumped you and just left but … Tell him soon, okay?«

»What do you mean?«

»Oswald, of course. Even a blind man would see that you are in love with him. So tell him. You never know when fate intervenes and then it might be too late.« He knew that his words were meant encouragingly, yet he couldn't help but hear a threat in them. He wasn't as bothered by the fact that Jim knew how he felt for Oswald. He had never cared much about how people would react to him liking men too. This was Gotham, after all. Still, he couldn't deny the sick feeling he got now that he knew that Jim had looked right through him.

This couldn't be good.

 

**-End of Chapter 6-**


	7. Chapter 7

Oswald wouldn't have thought that, of all people, it would be Harvey Bullock who would be this concerned about him that he actually helped Oswald to get a hold on a job at the GCPD. It was nothing special, only a job as an errand boy which hardly brought him much money anyway. Yet, it was a start, just as Ed had told him as he had introduced him to the idea a little while ago. By now, his first week at the GCPD was almost over and until now everything had worked as it should have without many incidents. Edward, for his part, saw that quite differently, though. It was not new to Oswald, that Edward was not very fond of his colleagues at the precinct but ever since he had started running errands for the other cops, Ed’s opinion about them only seemed to have worsened. Almost not a day passed without Edward telling Oswald that he could not let the other officers treat him as they did.

Of course, it was no secret that they, the other cops, disliked him - or rather the old him. And they had their fun with him too but that didn't quite concern Oswald in the slightest, unlike Ed, as it appeared. Somehow, Ed seemed a lot more bothered than Oswald by their quips and remarks at his expense, while Oswald himself just brushed them off and tried not to put too much weight on their little teasing. What good would it do him to worry about it too much anyway? Of course, they were wary of him, their former foe to walk freely through the GCPD. They couldn't be blamed for feeling this way. So, all he could do now was to convince them all that he was not that same person anymore, that he was better and good now even. Sooner or later, they would see this change in him too, he was sure of it, and then their teasing would stop without a doubt.

Still, Ed didn't seem to view it like that. But that was Ed, after all. Ed always had such a grim view of the world around him. But while Ed saw a foe behind every corner, Oswald was eager to please whenever he went to get lunch for whoever asked him to get something from the store nearby. Jim, Harvey, and Lee took up his services quite often. Ed too, of course, but mainly because they would have lunch together in his office almost every day since he started working at the precinct. It took him a few days until the other cops seemed to have warmed up to him and his new job a little bit more and were then ready to place their orders as well. Perhaps they had feared he would poison them if they would ask him to bring them coffee or something to eat. But after they did start placing their orders with him, Oswald hardly had a quiet day anymore.

»They are using you.« Ed had claimed after the fourth day of Oswald running back and forth from the shops to the precinct. »They must know about your leg and they shoo you on purpose.« However, Oswald did not want to believe that his words might hold any truth to them.

Those were good people, after all, and they would not deliberately make a crippled person suffer. Not that he would be suffering, but his leg was not very fond of having to run around that much.

It was his third trip to a local coffee shop that day when it happened. By now, the barista behind the counter, a nice young lady with beautiful auburn hair, knew Oswald from his numerous daily trips to this very joint and greeted him with a smile as soon as Oswald entered the shop. Everything was as it should be. He waited in line, then ordered the coffees for Officer Alvarez, Officer McKenzie and Officer McCormick, waited, and left the coffee shop with the three coffees only a few minutes after he first entered it. The only thing that was not as it should be, was the man waiting outside of the shop, dressed in a suit like the one Oswald had possessed not too long ago.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

When Edward left the lab around four in the afternoon, he almost immediately ran into Alvarez and had almost dropped the file he was carrying as well. »Hey, Nygma.« The cop addressed him right away. Apparently, he had been looking for Ed, which was odd in and of itself - and frankly a little unsettling too. »Have you seen your boyfriend? He's one lousy errand boy.«

Edward, being the bigger and more intelligent person, decided to ignore that Alvarez just referred to Oswald as his boyfriend - mainly because he liked the sound of it. »What's that supposed to mean?« He shot back but did his best to remain calm, collected and friendly, shoving his glasses back up his nose. They tended to slide down his nose when he would tilt his head down a little, so it happened quite a lot around Oswald and he had thusly grown to like the sensation. But not so much now as he looked at Alvarez. Ed was taller than most in the precinct, so looking down on people was almost inevitably and thus not only meant figuratively.

»He didn't come back from the coffee run for over two hours now. Not that I am getting worried or anything for the little freak, but I want either my coffee or my money back.« Alvarez sneered. »He probably took the money and ran. I said it before and I’ll say it again: It was just a matter of time that he would go rogue again. Sane my ass!«

»And what is he supposed to achieve with like ten bucks, Alvarez?« He couldn't quite keep his tone from going a bit darker there, just as his eyes as he now very deliberately looked down his nose at Alvarez. His disgust over his words was probably written all too clearly on his face while his mind was racing. Oswald, no matter if the old or the new version of him, was always very reliable. He was never late, he never broke his promises and he took his job as an errand boy very seriously too. Him not coming back could not be a good sign and that spun him into a whirlwind of worry and uncertainty that made him want to leave the station immediately. »I’m done here for today anyway, I try to find out what happened and bring you your money tomorrow, alright? I guess you’ll survive until then.«

Alvarez muttered something else under his breath that Edward decided to ignore, simply because otherwise he would probably feel the need to punch his teeth in - a desire he felt all too often anyway lately. Alvarez was only one of the many assholes that liked to torment Oswald under the guise of fake friendliness. He was glad that he could see Oswald even more than he usually could since he started working as an errand boy for the GCPD. Yet, his heart ached whenever he saw how he was treated here. It was as if they had thrown a lamb into a lion’s den or a Penguin into the shark tank for a better analogy.

Ed quickly delivered his paperwork to the desk of Officer Rosen before he grabbed the rest of his belongings and left the precinct. Of course, Oswald could be anywhere in this city, especially if something serious had happened to Oswald on his last coffee run. He could have been hit by a car, after all, or kidnapped or attacked by his former enemies! Everything seemed possible and he was sure that there were a lot of people that were out for blood when it came to Oswald. Over the years he had made many enemies and surely, every single one of them would like to take this opportunity to get their hands on a pretty much helpless Oswald. This whole idea of Bullock having Oswald act as an errand boy had been stupid! He should have known how dangerous this might be!

His hope was, however, that Oswald had returned to the apartment for whatever reason. Maybe he really did steal from Alvarez. Ed, if anything, would find joy in that above anything else. So this was the place Edward turned to first in his search for Oswald even though it wouldn't be like Oswald to just vanish and go home without telling anyone about it. Especially not without telling Ed!

Edward arrived a few minutes after he had left the station at his apartment and as soon as he opened the door, he knew that his worries had been unfounded. His eyes fell on the bed right away and there he was, a mountain of blankets right in the middle of his bed. It was undoubtedly Oswald because he a) didn't know a person who would do something like this except Oswald, and b) did no one else have a key to his apartment.

»Oswald?« He approached the bed slowly but all he got in return was a heavy flinch from that seemingly sentient mountain of blankets. He still sat down on the edge of the bed and slowly put a hand on what he could only assume to be Oswald’s right shoulder. Again, he was rewarded with a flinch and something that sounded a lot like a choked sob. His first instinct was to pull the blanket back and reveal his friend underneath, but he froze right in the midst of moving his hand to where he assumed his head was and rose back to his feet instead. Whatever happened, it had shaken Oswald enough to seek out shelter under his blankets and apparently almost as much as his Arkham nightmares. Touching him or reveal him was probably the worst thing he could do right now.

His feet carried him over to the small piano in the corner of his room before he sat down on the small stool. Until now, Oswald had always reacted very positively to music and had always calmed down quite fast as soon as he would play the piano or even sing. So that was exactly what he was going to do now to ease his friend’s mind after whatever had happened to him. He didn't even know if it would work this time, but there was no harm in trying. At least that was what he thought as he started playing the first notes of the song he came to connect to Oswald a little more than he should let him know. He didn't feel like singing, but he assumed that Oswald knew the song still and he continued until he heard the rustling of the blankets in his back.

As he threw a glance over his left shoulder at the young man behind him, he noticed immediately how tousled his hair looked and how pale he was. He looked like he had seen a ghost or stumbled into someone he had not expected to see. Only as Oswald slowly sat up straight in the bed, did Edward stop playing the piano and rose from his spot again to cross the distance between them and sit down on the edge of the bed once again. »What happened?« What use would there be to beat around the bush? It was obvious that something had happened to Oswald or otherwise he would have finished his coffee run for Alvarez.

To his biggest surprise, it was Oswald who bridged the distance between them first as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against Edward’s left shoulder. »I saw one of the men who attacked me.« Oswald's voice was almost too quiet to really hear him and at first, he wasn't sure that he had properly heard him, to begin with. »He was wearing my suit.« His voice sounded hollow as Edward gingerly put his arms around his small friend and gently drew circles on Oswald’s back with his fingers.

»Did he attack you again?«

»No … He didn't see me, I think.« He mumbled but sounded a lot more distressed than he would have expected. Then again, running into his attackers had been his biggest fear ever since he started to leave the apartment on his own again and now exactly that had happened. Of course, he was distressed.

»I’m glad you’re safe.« Ed found himself replying softly. »I was worried when Alvarez told me that you didn't come back.«

»I forgot about Alvarez…« Oswald finally confessed. »I already got the coffee … Dropped it when I saw him. I have to pay him back … Surely, no one wants to order something from me again.« He could sense what the little guy was thinking before Oswald could say it even. In Oswald's eyes, he had disappointed everyone, including Edward and himself just because he panicked as he saw his attacker. »I can never go back to the precinct and face them. Surely, all of them think I took the money and ran, surely everyone thinks that I stole the money and went back to being the Penguin!«

»Nobody thinks that, Oswald.« He tried to comfort but to no avail.

»And what if I see him again … or the others? What if they attack me again? I never even saw them that night! It could be anyone! What if they follow me here and rob your apartment and beat you up too? What if-«

However, before Oswald could even continue his little tantrum, Edward had made a possibly very stupid split-second decision as he suddenly grabbed Oswald by his sharp jaw and leaned down to him to press his lips against Oswald’s. Just to shut him up if anything. Oswald's lips were soft against his and his eyes opened wide, much to Ed’s dismay. Of course, he had hoped they would fall shut on impact, that maybe Oswald had hoped to be kissed by him even. Yet, he remained completely unresponsive and Ed’s mind was racing as he tried to figure out what to do next as he slowly pulled away again and tried a cocky smirk.

»There, all better now.« He muttered almost in a mocking little tone. »You worry too much.«

»You kissed me.« He sounded confused, startled even.

»It seemed the only way to shut you up.« He regretted these words almost instantly. It was such a mean thing to say and yet it saved him the embarrassment of getting rejected by his best friend who would be too nice to just slap him as he would deserve it. Still, Ed found himself brushing his fingers over Oswald’s left cheek gingerly. »You should rest a little. Don't try to think about it, alright? Nothing bad is going to happen to you anymore, I promise.« Again, Oswald opened his mouth to say something, but Ed rose one finger threateningly at him. »Don't make me kiss you again, Oz.« He warned with a smirk that he didn't even feel before he rose to his feet. »Sleep a little. I take care of the Alvarez situation, okay? And tomorrow is a new day. Everything is going to be just fine.«

»Are you leaving?«

»Not for long. I’m back in time for dinner.«    

※※※※※※※

**Arkham Asylum**

Jim really wasn't happy to see Arkham again so shortly after he had visited last time. And he could only hope that he would not leave with another patient under his wings this time. Lee would probably greatly appreciate that too. Hugo Strange seemed to think the same thing as they met at his office this late in the day, as the sun was slowly setting on the Horizon and cast a gloomy magenta light through the office windows. He was his usual charming and overly friendly self as he offered Jim a seat at his desk. They had met just outside the elevator after Jim’s arrival had been announced to him and Professor Strange just as eager as last time to shake his hand.

»It's so good to see you again so soon, Detective.« Strange smiled at him but, of course, he couldn't quite mask the wary undertone in his voice at his words. Someone as smart as Hugo Strange must certainly know that Jim didn't come to just say hello and pay him a polite little visit at Arkham for no other reason than being polite. »What brings you here so soon after your last visit? It is not about Mr. Cobblepot, I hope.«

»It is, actually.« Jim replied swiftly, but kept his tone friendly, almost casual. People tended to tense up a bit when he would use his serious policeman-voice on them.

»He didn't relapse, did he?« And Strange, for his part, actually did sound concerned this time around. Of course, he was only worried that his experiment had failed.

»No, not at all. He is as gentle as ever.« Jim replied calmly. »That's exactly the reason why I am here, actually.« Now, he had the other man’s attention. Strange leaned back in his chair a little, lifting his brows in surprise.

»Oh?« He replied now clearly intrigued by what he had to say.

»I was just wondering how you did it. Changing someone like Oswald Cobblepot so thoroughly, I mean.« He couldn't deny that Ed’s concerns had had their effect on him these past couple of days as he had been able to observe Oswald a little more closely since he started his work at the precinct. It was just like Ed had told him. Oswald was pretty much defenseless against every mockery and every teasing from the other cops. He just took every insult, smiled and delivered what they ordered. On his own, in a city like Gotham, Oswald in his current state, would not survive for long. Sure, he didn't want to have the old Oswald, the Penguin, back on the loose in Gotham. However, this current Oswald was starting to unnerve him and possibly even more than the Penguin ever had. With the old Oswald at least he had always known where they were at, his motives as clear as they could be with someone like Oswald.

Now, however, everything seemed just uncertain with this man and they could not forever hold his hand and help him along the way just because otherwise he would be too easy a prey.

»Of course, you can't expect me to openly tell you my secret, Detective Gordon.«

»Of course, not. But I am interested what this treatment was and if it will work on others too.«

»The treatment Mr. Cobblepot received is still in its infancy, but it's, certainly, the goal to apply it to other patients and help them too.« Of course, he didn't want to tell him what had been done to Oswald. That, however, only furthered his assumption that Ed was right and that the treatment might have included some form of torture. Why else wouldn't he want to tell him? After all, it wasn't as if Jim was going to steal his method, right?

»I understand that, Professor Strange. I am just curious. I mean, did you use a new kind of drug or something else on him?« Jim decided to drill deeper. He would not go without at least _some_ answers but he had no reason or means to pry them from Strange. It would be better to play the curious and enthusiastic party here, maybe bribe him with compliments on his work even. That was what Oswald, the old Oswald, would have done to get information from this man. He couldn't help to feel a little dirty though. »Don't get me wrong, I don't want to interfere with your work, Professor. I do believe you are actually doing a very good job here at Arkham. When I worked here for a while, this place was an absolute shithole, excuse my French. You brought back order and discipline and your patients seem to make great progress too. The best example of that would be Oswald, of course. See, I am just so curious how you managed to change someone as bad and evil as Oswald Cobblepot into someone this gentle and sweet. He is an absolute joy to be around these days and actually even works for the GCPD at the moment in a minor position. No one can believe it's even the same person.«

Compliments on his work seemed to do the trick, though Jim was not nearly naive enough to think that Strange would come out and outright tell him everything now. Especially not if Ed’s suspicions were correct and he was conducting illegal experiments. Oswald had been brainwashed at the very least but he refused to believe that he had been _healed_. Oswald was a sociopath, there was no treatment for that.

»Indeed we did try a new drug that I developed during the last year. Naturally, I can assure you that the drug has been highly tested before I ever used it on one of my patients and it meets the demanded criteria. However, it is new and was never used outside of Arkham up to this point. Mr. Cobblepot’s treatment was composed of this drug, a mild sedative, regular scheduled private therapy sessions with me at my office twice a week, everyday group therapy, and the ever popular art therapy. He proved to be a quite talented painter, I must say, although his repertoire was lacking in variety. He usually drew and painted penguins.«

»Huh« The sound escaped Jim before he could stop it. »I’m surprised then that Oswald said he couldn't remember much of his treatment except that he was tortured.«

»I am not surprised to hear that by any means, Detective Gordon.« Strange smiled. »Our patients often view their treatment as such. In due time he will realize that it was all in his best interest. I can assure you that no harm has been done to Mr. Cobblepot.«

»Except for that beating he received from Helzinger.« Although he knew that mentioning that was a mistake, he hadn't been able to keep it from slipping out.

»I didn't expect Helzinger to lose his temper so thoroughly.«

»Yet you didn't do anything until Oswald was already bleeding on the floor.«

»I had to make sure that Mr. Cobblepot would not fall back into old habits and fight back.«

These words concerned Jim probably more than they should. Yet, he couldn't help the shiver running down his spine at this. »But isn’t the wish to fight back a necessary survival instinct? And now that he doesn't have this anymore, or at the very least doesn't follow it anymore, he is pretty much easy prey for everyone out there.« They all knew that Oswald had made many enemies over the course of his years as part of the mob. It was a miracle that no one actually ever stepped forward to collect him and make him pay until now.  

»That might be true, but I can assure you that Mr. Cobblepot himself will never do harm to anyone ever again.«

»How can you be so sure?«

»The sole thought of inflicting violence will cause him discomfort, that is what my therapy of him managed to achieve. I rewired his brain so that something that brought him joy before, like inflicting violence, would now fill him with dread. It's just that simple.«

He thought back to how he had found Oswald on the steps to the GCPD not too long ago, clutching his head in agony as it had seemed. Was this what Strange had described as discomfort? If it was, then it was definitely way more than just that. Strange was not telling the entire truth and Jim would make sure he would find it, even if he would have to turn this place upside down.

※※※※※※※

_The sound of screaming came back to him again. Dark hallways spread out in front of him like an endless maze. Shadows were moving in on him and people in masks tearing at his flesh until it would fall from his bones. He felt the fingers all over his body, burning into his skin, sure to leave marks that would forever stain. Everyone would see the filth on him. He wanted to fight, to kick and scream, but his limbs wouldn't cooperate. His throat was hoarse and dry, his lips sewn shut. He was unable to make a sound, even as the pain came back crashing down on him, trying to consume him whole, eating away at his raw flesh, ripping out strings of it piece by piece. He felt the blood pooling out of him, running down his legs and painting his skin red forever. He was naked to the bone, alone in the darkness with all those shadows around him, ready to strike now at any second._

As he jolted awake, the light inside the room was burning out his eyes all at once. His first instinct was to scramble away from the figure that was right in front of him, trying to push him into the mattress with the force of their weight before Oswald could scramble to the headboard of the bed he was lying in.

»Oswald!« He knew that voice but for the longest moment, he couldn't even connect it to a face. Until the face of the man who had called out for him started to take shape in front of him, too close for comfort, arms circling around him to squeeze him so tightly that he couldn't even breathe. He couldn't breathe, no matter how much he tried to suck in air. He was hyperventilating! Panic was rushing through his veins, his blood was boiling and his body felt like it was being doused with cold water. His eyes were without focus. Even as he desperately tried to make sense of the face in front of him, of the rich brown eyes behind a pair of glasses, of the pale skin, the messy brown hair. Nothing made sense. »Oswald!« The voice sounded again. »Oswald, it's me, Edward.«

Edward. The name sparked something inside of him that he couldn't quite name yet. Edward. His Edward. His friend. He tried to blink away the shadows that were creeping in on him, but he could hardly focus and keep his mind in the here and now - where ever that was. He was dragged back into these endless corridors and hallways, back into the darkness of the asylum. He could hear the screams around him, the mumbling - that terrifying mumbling! - and felt the hands on his skin. He was hiding under his bed again among dirt and spiderwebs. And yet, he could do nothing as strong hands grabbed him by the feet and pulled him out from underneath it with spiders tangled in his hair and dust filling his lungs.

Something was pressed against his temple, soft and warm and so far removed from what was happening in front of his eyes, that Oswald knew it couldn't be real. The soft warm press against his temple remained where it was and only after a second or two, he realized that it was the press of lips against his skin. Instead of shrinking away from Edward, Oswald remained frozen in place, even melting against the man who was slowly choking the air out of him. Ed’s lips remained at his temple the entire time and only as Oswald started to feel light-headed, only as he was certain that his heart would stop beating from the lack of air, did he finally manage to take one deep breath again, filling his lungs until they almost burst.

»Another nightmare?« Edward hummed gently as he finally pulled away just slightly and just so that he could rest his chin on the crown of Oswald’s messy hair. »I shouldn't have left you alone for so long, Oswald.«

»It's not your fault.« The words came out almost automatically while he felt the presence of something hovering behind him. He didn't dare to look over his shoulder, afraid of what he might see. Of course, his nightmares were not Edward’s fault. »I don't know what I would do without you, Ed.« Those words were even the truth, not that he would have much chance but telling the truth anyway these days. His other self, his darker self, the Penguin … Oh, he would have lied in such a situation to get the most out of it. But all Oswald saw now was his friend, Ed, who had been so good to him, so caring and loving and supporting in spite of the fact that he wasn't the person he had befriended anymore.

While Jim Gordon and his posse seemed all too glad that he had changed so much, Edward seemed to miss the Penguin, though. No, he didn't miss the Penguin, not the old Oswald, he missed the mentor that he had found in him back before Oswald had been caught and sent to Arkham. That was the real truth behind all of this. That was the level of friendship that they had before Arkham. Nonetheless, he doubted that Edward would be able to see that. »I’m sorry that I’m always such a wreck. You are not my babysitter, after all, Ed. You have more than enough other things to do except babysitting me, a grown man, just because of some stupid nightmare.«

»That's what friends are for, Oswald.« The fingers that were brushing through his hair were comforting. He couldn't deny how calm and comfortable he felt so close to Ed. And he couldn't quite forget the way his lips had felt against his own a few hours ago either. How long had he been asleep anyway? Outside the world was pitch black and wouldn't it be for the smog hanging over the city, he would have been able to see the stars in the nightly sky. He had to have been out for hours now and yet he hardly felt any better. His meeting with one of the men who had beaten him up so badly still shook him to the core. It was almost a little ridiculous, though. He had never seen the man’s face before. He had been clocked over the head from behind that night and then, half-consciously, been kicked when he had already been lying on the ground, mercilessly, before they had stripped him. He hadn't told it to anyone, but he had been conscious, or at least semi-conscious when they began undressing him back then. He had felt their hands twisting his body to rid him of his clothes as quickly as possible. He had felt their fingers burning into his icy cold skin. And right before his world had turned black and upside down all at once, he had been certain that they would do even worse to him in that alleyway between those overspilling trash cans.

They hadn't.

It was pure luck that they hadn't, but the bitter part of his mind would never cease to make him remember that it wouldn't have been the first time anyway. The Penguin was still whispering poisonous little words to him, even now. This was Gotham and the weak were eaten alive by this grandiose city and those who deemed themselves stronger. The weak didn't stand a chance. He, in his current condition, didn't stand a chance and yet there was no way back. He didn't want to go back either. He didn't wish to remember his mother singing to him as she had bathed him when he had been little to ease the pain and make the fear and the blood and all of the horrible things that had happened to him go away. This was meant to be a fresh and clean start. A new Oswald, a new life. Pure again. Innocent again. Nothing had changed.

He knew that without his darker self, he was doomed, and he hated that fact. He hated knowing that the Penguin had been there for a reason, that he had been the thing protecting Oswald from getting stomped into the ground again and again, of being crushed by this city. He knew all of this despite that his friends seemed to think he didn't. But was this reason enough to let the darkness seep back into him? Even if he knew how, even if he could, should he? As it turned out, this was exactly what was going to be tested this night, as Oswald grew aware of the sounds coming from the bathroom. It sounded a lot like muffled screams.

»Edward.« He began quietly as he started to withdraw from his friend. »What's in the bathroom?«

Ed’s face lit up with glee at this. »Oh, that!« He grinned and slowly rose from the bed. »I’m glad you’re asking! It's a gift I have for you, actually.« Ed extended a hand to him to help him rise to his feet and Oswald accepted the helping hand gladly as he was still so unsteady on his feet. A part of him dreaded what he was going to see as soon as Edward would open the bathroom door and yet he hobbled along with him to the door. He should have trusted his instinct on that, Oswald decided the moment the door was opened and the light inside switched on. He was met with the sight of a man, lying almost naked except for his underwear in Ed’s bathtub. His hands and feet were bound together tightly with duct-tape, a sack over his head obscured his face and Oswald found the remains of his old suit lying on the ground next to the tub.

»I didn't know if you would want to keep your old suit or if I should throw it away.« Ed grinned sheepishly at him.

»Is that…«

»That's one of the guys who attacked and beat you up, yes.« Edward smiled almost sweetly just as he had back when he had once presented Oswald with Mr. Leonard before his stay at Arkham. »After you ran into him today, I went out to track him down. As you can see, I succeeded. It was not so very hard to find him, though, almost a bit disappointing, I must say. He was still in the area and your suit - Well, it stuck out like a sore thumb on him. Really, guys like this … They do anything for money. Getting him to follow me was easy as pie. Of, course, I made sure I had the right guy before I brought him here.«

»And … now what?«

He wasn't surprised as Edward produced a knife from the back pocket of his pants. A switchblade, to be more precise, which he snapped open quickly in a flash of silver, making the man in the tub steer uneasy by that very distinguished sound of singing metal. »You deserve the honor of taking out your revenge on him.«

»I don't feel interested in taking revenge on anyone, Edward.« This seemed only to make Edward angry as he looked at him now out of narrowed dark eyes.

»Aren't you angry, Oswald?« He snarled. »You have to be angry! This man and his friends attacked you, they stole from you, they beat you, they stripped you, they left you for dead!«

Oswald couldn't help but take a step back from Edward. He didn't feel afraid of his friend. No, that was not why he was stepping back. He just felt uneasy as it had never been clearer to him than now that Edward wanted the old Oswald back. »I’m … not angry.« Oswald replied quietly. He would be if he could. _Before Arkham, you wouldn't have wasted a second thought_ , that poisonous little voice reminded him. He felt once more as if there was something right behind him, lurking in the shadows of the dimly lit apartment, hidden in the green glow coming from outside. By now, it was so close that he could feel it's breath on his neck that sent shivers down his spine. He knew what it was. He knew its name but he refused to recognize it, for recognizing it would give it power and that would mean pain. Unbearable amounts of pain. Even now, just thinking about stabbing that man caused him pain. He felt it searing through his brain like some electric current. It made him feel sick to his stomach all of the sudden and there was no way around it.

»Yes, you are, Oswald!« Ed growled and as Oswald took yet another step back, Edward grabbed him by the shoulders. The open knife was still in his right hand now pressing flatly against Oswald’s shoulder as Ed held him firmly, unwilling to let him go or escape his clutches. He felt like a fly in the web of a spider and he liked that feeling. Somehow. Somehow this dangerous twitch to Edward’s left eye that promised of the darkness that was lying beneath those eyes, made him unable to look away. It was mesmerizing, it was horribly attractive. Then again, he had always been drawn to danger and dangerous men as well. Jim Gordon was not an exception to this rule either. Though he was a cop, everyone could see how dangerous Jim Gordon could be and the same was true for Edward at this moment.

He could see it clearly now. That was why he didn't try to escape him. That was why he didn't make him lose his grip on his shoulders. He _liked_ it. He wasn't even scared of Ed, but he liked that feeling of those possessive hands that were bigger than his own gripping him tightly, unwilling to let him go.

This time, it was Oswald who bridged the distance between them as he rose to his toes, felt his hands settle on Edward’s neck, and drew him into a kiss.

 

**-End of Chapter 7-**


	8. Chapter 8

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

No one had ever claimed that investigating a man like Hugo Strange and his methods would be easy especially after the good Professor was not too willing to tell him anything at all except for the names of a few other patients that were going through the same treatment as Oswald and were looking just as promising as the former crime lord. Jim's day in Arkham, after he had been led towards the entrance elevator by Strange himself, ended with them passing by the cell of one of those patients. It had already been late in the day and Jim desired nothing more than a hot shower and Lee’s company so that she could tell him everything he needed to know about the color their baby’s room would have or what she decided their house would look like. Normal things like that. No experiments, no insane asylums, no supervillains, no megalomaniac crime lords becoming suddenly as gentle as a lamb. Just normal everyday stuff.

By now, he should've known that things didn't work like this in Gotham and he should be grateful for it too. Because as Strange had led him towards the elevator and thus past the cells of his other unfortunate experiments, Jim had finally gotten what he needed to have a reason to pursue this further.

They had heard the shrill laughter as soon as they walked into the hallway and the closer they got to one of the cells, the laughter had only grown louder and shriller. »See no evil, do no evil!« Those were the words that had been mixed into the laughter again and again. He had known that approaching the cell would mean seeing something he wished he wouldn't have seen and even an hour later, after he had made his way through Gotham’s thick traffic to the GCPD instead of his apartment, he knew that he would not be able to shake off what he had seen that evening. Now all he needed was to tell Barnes about this. And he already knew what response he would get.

He made his way through the station without acknowledging any one of his colleagues. There was still light in Barnes’ office but surely the captain would soon leave the precinct and retire for the night, just as he should too with his pregnant fiance waiting for him at home. A brisk knock at the door got him a curt »Yes« coming from inside, prompting him to open the door and quickly step inside before he closed the door behind him again. His captain looked at him in surprise at his late visit.

»Gordon, shouldn't you be home with Doctor Thompkins already? Your shift ended three hours ago.« The captain frowned. Despite his hard demeanor, he was one big softy, not to say a teddy especially to Lee. Ever since she fell pregnant, Barnes was always very eager to have Jim not working overtime as much as he usually would. He couldn't deny that he was grateful for his help and understanding in this regard for the last thing he wanted was to ruin his relationship with Lee like he had ruined his relationship with Barbara.

»I promise I will go as soon as I told you what happened today, Sir.« Jim replied quickly as he stepped closer towards the heavy oak wood desk. »Sir, I visited Professor Strange in Arkham today.«

»And why is that?« Captain Barnes asked raising a brow in the fashion of a man who could sense a storm coming days away.

»It's about Cobblepot.«

A deep sigh left Barnes’ throat. »I knew that this would not go over well. I told you it was just a matter of time until that little freak would go back to his old ways. Listen, Gordon, I agreed to Cobblepot playing the errand boy because that would mean we would have an eye on him but if you are going to tell me now that-«

»Oswald didn't do anything wrong, Sir.« Jim quickly interrupted his boss and grabbed the backrest of the chair on the unoccupied side of Barne’s desk. »Nygma actually asked me to look into Strange, Sir.«

»Nygma? What has he to do with all of this now?«

»Oswald lives with him for the moment, until he can afford something of his own, and he is concerned about Oswald's sudden change in personality. I have to say, that I agree with him on that note. Oswald's sudden change during his time in Arkham is very concerning to me too. A man does not change like Oswald did in such short a time - not so drastically.« Although he would wish that it was true. He wished Oswald had changed and that this new Oswald, no matter how unsettling his smiles were, was here to stay and the Penguin a thing of the past.

»Gordon, you have a habit of overthinking things and to get into situations that do not concern you. Shouldn't we all be glad that the Penguin is history now and that Cobblepot is a new and reformed man? Why do you always have to find problems where there aren't any?« He sounded more like an exasperated parent than anything else by this point.

»I would agree with you normally, Sir.« Jim sighed, adamant to stand his ground. »If it wouldn't be so suspicious. You see, if Oswald just changed through therapy and would be stable now, I would be glad and not look into it further. But the surrounding details of that change do bother me.«

»And what are those details?«

»When I first saw him in Arkham a few months ago during that disaster with Mr. and Mrs. Fries, he told me he was being tortured. Naturally, I didn't believe him. I was certain he would say anything for me to help him get out of there.«

»Which was wise.«

»But then he got out and now it's like even thinking something bad, even feeling anger, is causing him physical pain, Sir. This can't be healthy. However, I would have let it slip too, had Nygma not come to me for help. He is claiming that Oswald shows signs of past torture - physical torture, Sir.«

»So?«

»So I went to Arkham to try and find out what kind of treatment Professor Strange put upon him. Sir, I realize that we should be glad that he is a changed man and that there will be more people on Gotham’s streets like him if Strange’s treatment works on the other lunatics in there too, but if those changes are generated through physical torture and brainwashing, I couldn't stand for it. Those people inside Arkham, whether they are insane or not, are still human beings and they still have their rights. Torture is prohibited by law and if that is what is happening inside of Arkham under Strange’s order, we cannot let this continue.«

Barnes was quiet at first, looking at Jim openly as he always did with his hands folded on the desk before him. Jim could see that he was carefully weighing Jim’s words in his head and that they had clearly appealed to his moral compass. They were quite alike in this matter. They both just wanted to preserve law and order in this city and Jim knew that, if anyone, Barnes would do the right thing. »Do you have any proof of your suspicion towards Hugo Strange?«

»Not physical proof, no. I would need a search warrant for it. I tried talking to him on friendly terms today, tried to make him reveal information about Oswald's treatment.«

»And did he reveal anything?«

»Just that the drug he used on Oswald is new and was developed by him. He is going to use it on other patients as well, has in the past too. Oswald was not the first test subject for this drug and this special kind of treatment, Sir. He said the drug met every criteria it needed to to be legal. However, when I left, he wanted to show me a few of the other test subjects.«

»And?«

»One of them, a man named Nigel Evergreen, who was administered the same treatment as Oswald for almost as long a time as him, had just gouged out his own eyes as we walked up to his cell. The man was completely out of his mind at this point, worse than ever before.«

»Gordon.« He knew that sound and the sigh that followed only made it more clear what he would say. »I appreciate that you are concerned about the patients of Arkham despite their deeds, and that you are concerned for Mr. Cobblepot in his new situation, but this is a looney bin, Gordon. None of the things you tell me would justify a search warrant. That Mr. Evergreen gouged out his eyes may be a tragic turn of events, but we cannot prove that it has anything to do with the treatment that Mr. Cobblepot received or with some kind of torture. Listen, I am willing to believe your gut instinct on this, Gordon, because we all know that it's usually right. But, as long as Mr. Cobblepot is not willing to come to me and make a statement about what happened to him in Arkham, my hands are tied and you know that.«

Of course, he did and yet Jim felt like a beaten puppy as he left the office not long after that. He was disappointed, surely, yet it was understandable what Barnes had told him. Of course, his hands were tied on this. Jim had nothing. That was the sad truth. He had nothing except the feeling in the pit of his stomach when he would look at Oswald and those empty eyes that seemed so rid of any true emotion. It was true that Oswald was a very emotional man and no one knew this better than Jim who could still see him before him on the day he had been supposed to put a bullet in his head or how he came to him in his grief after his mother’s death. There was nothing left now of any kind of emotion, when he would look at him.

Something was wrong at Arkham, something sinister was going on in there and he would find out the truth, even if it meant he would need to break in.

It was sheer coincidence that he ran into Harvey on his way out. Usually, his friend was not too eager to work overtime at all, but the paperwork, every policeman's worst nightmare, would not just disappear, he assumed. Even Harvey seemed to realize that. »Jim, shouldn't you be home?« Harvey addressed him as he walked up the stairs to the balcony.

»I should.« Jim sighed and soon gave Harvey the rundown on everything that had happened after he went to Arkham just like he did with Barnes only that Harvey’s reaction was a little different than that of the captain had been earlier.

»So« Harvey concluded after a moment of silence settling over them only interrupted by the hustle and bustle of the police station. »You need proof then, huh?« Harvey chuckled and prompted Jim to raise his brows in curiosity. »Don't look at me like that, Jim! Don't we know a little alley cat that could take a look at Strange’s office when he’s not there?«

»You don't mean … No, Harvey, we cannot ask Selina to break into Arkham, that's crazy!« It was too dangerous! The girl was a child still. True, a talented sneaky child and one of the best thieves he had ever seen already, but that didn't change his opinion about the situation. It couldn't change his opinion.

»Jim, either you want information or you don't. If you really think that there's something amiss in Arkham that worries you enough to tell Barnes about it, if you really want to know what's going on in the looney bin, Selina is the right way to go because you will not get information or proof the nice way.«

There was no way around it and Jim knew this. Harvey was right, of course. If he wanted results, he needed to go the dirty way but just because he knew that it didn't make things any anything easier at all. If anything, it made it all worse.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham City - Edward’s Apartment**

Even in his wildest dreams, Ed Nygma wouldn't have thought that he would find himself in this situation. There was a man lying bound, gagged and with a burlap sack over his head in his bathtub, probably terrified out of his goddamn mind - and rightfully so, as his Doppelgänger so helpfully reminded him. There was a man in his bathtub who had attacked Oswald, who had beaten Oswald, who had stolen from Oswald and he should be there slicing him open to having him bleed out like a pig after Oswald had been so unwilling to do just that. Instead, Oswald’s soft moans were filling the room as he dragged his tongue over the side of his jaw, trying to make him relax enough for what he was about to do, trying to not get him to notice how he opened the bottle of lube that he had found in his bedside table to coat the index and middle finger of his right hand generously.

Everything that had led them to this situation was a blur right now. He remembered the kiss as Oswald had turned away from his attacker and the flash of something he couldn't quite name in Oswald's blue eyes. This time it had been Oswald who had kissed him and there had been no confusion about the meaning of it either, no backing out of the situation. Ed had dropped the knife to the floor, his hands upon Oswald in an instant as he had drowned in his heat.

For months, ever since Oswald had first been lying in this bed with a gunshot wound to his right shoulder, had he been fantasizing about pushing him down and taking him until he would forget that Jim Gordon even existed. However, as he glanced at Oswald now and saw how he bit his bottom lip in anticipation, those fantasies were put to shame right away. Not in his wildest dreams would he have thought Oswald capable of looking at him like this, his eyes not averted in shame, perhaps, but outright staring at him, never breaking their eye contact, his eyes glazed over by lust. Somewhere along the lines he had lost his glasses as Oswald had stolen them from him, but he could see everything clearly enough now and Oswald's moans or the way he writhed beneath him on the bed, told him everything he needed to know anyway.

His legs fell open for Edward right away as he slid between them. There was no need to push him in any way. Oswald was as eager to feel him as Edward was eager to take what was his, with no one to interfere in this and no Jim Gordon watching him with narrowed eyes for taking advantage of his friend’s incapability to refuse him or put on a fight. Oswald sucked in his breath as Ed circled one lubed digit around his entrance, making sure that Oswald would know what was coming - not that he would get to back out now. He didn't wish to be cruel or brutal or hurt Oswald, but he knew that his other self would not take no for an answer. What did this say about him?

Ed was desperate to make him feel relaxed, even though Oswald's face did not speak of discomfort as Ed was kissing down a trail over his chest, down his stomach, his tongue scraping over old scars and new ones, sipping into the valleys of his abdomen, feeling the flutter of his stomach as he tried to breathe more evenly just as Edward managed to work his finger inside. He was slow, almost maddeningly slow to Oswald judging by the keening little sounds he made at this, but he didn't wish to inflict pain. God knew Oswald had suffered enough pain already.  

Ed could see the tell-tale signs of past abuse. Never through the hands of Oswald’s loving mother, though. No, unlike Ed’s mother, Gertrud had cared for her son with all her heart and yet he could see it clearly play out in front of him and cursed his traitorous mind. For others the hints and the marks were invisible, but for Ed, they weren't. He had seen them right from the beginning.

The more Oswald relaxed, the easier it was for him. He decided to take his time, drawing his tongue slowly over Oswald’s cock to draw yet another deep moan from the former crime lord, causing Oswald to curl his fingers into the sheets in one sorry attempt of regaining control over his own body all the while Edward continued to push in, gaining depth with each push. The moment Oswald arched off the bed and tried to push against him with something akin to a scream ripping from his throat, Edward knew that he had curled his fingers in just the right way, pushing just the right spot.

»Oh, God, Ed!« Oswald moaned sending a jolt of pleasure straight to Ed’s groin at the sound of his own name rolling from his lips like this. »Please do that again!« The old Oswald would have demanded and not ask nicely, but at this very moment, Edward was very much inclined not to care too much. Of course, he was all too eager to comply and this time, as Oswald arched into his touch, he quickly worked the second finger in while he kept dragging his tongue ever so slowly from base to tip. Oswald was writhing on the bed like he had always imagined it and yet so much better, moaning and whimpering under the pressure of the sweet pain that Edward brought him through his skilled fingers.

»Tell me what you need.« Ed found himself huffing his hot breath against the flesh before him. It was hard to even think straight now as he was met with the look of sheer lust in Oswald's face. A keening little noise escaped Oswald's throat as he pushed harder against his fingers. Impatient.

»I need to feel you.« The words came out breathless, desperate almost and Edward enjoyed every second of it. That was all it took for Edward to remove his fingers, causing a violent shudder to rip through the man beneath him at the loss of touch and friction that left him empty and wanting more, wanting desperately to be filled again. His legs opened even wider as Edward snaked his way up to Oswald's mouth, stealing yet another kiss from those sinful lips, softly this time and not as rushed or hard as those they had shared before. The more rational part of him wanted to tell him that Oswald needed to tell him to stop if he couldn't take it, but there was this other, much darker voice inside of him reminding Edward that he wouldn't listen anyway and that in itself scared the living daylights out of him. He didn't wish to hurt Oswald and he hadn't wished to hurt Kristen either. He wasn't in control half the time and yet he was unable to stop himself as their eyes locked once more, brown and ocean blue. A sheen of sweat glistened on Oswald's forehead as he lay before him open and raw, his hair even messier than from sleep, gaining Edward a sick sense of satisfaction that he had been the one causing this. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Ed sat back on his knees before he added more lube, lining himself up and pushing in slowly. Oswald's eyes widened at first, his mouth gaping open like a fish gasping for air on land. The deeper he pushed in, the calmer he felt, the quieter the voices in his head became. Suddenly, all he could hear was Oswald, all he could feel was Oswald and the poisonous voice in the back of his head was gone for good, at least for the moment. He felt complete in a way he had never experienced before, not even with Kristin.

»You are so tight.« The words escaped him in a deep groan as he was trying his damnedest to hold back and go slow.

Oswald reached up with trembling fingers to touch his face and pull him down closer to him before his lips were upon Edward's again, kissing him deeply, not willing to let him go again. There was no need for words despite that kiss. This was statement enough and so Edward pushed further until he was fully sheeted in the heat of Oswald's body that was wound as tightly as a bowstring. Oswald let out a shuddering breath against his lips, his stomach vibrating under the effort to relax around the fullness inside of him. Ed waited for one, then two, then three heartbeats before he pulled out almost all the way only to thrust back in. With each thrust, he moved faster and harder as he was slowly coming undone. He was desperate to get the angle just right for Oswald and every time he did, he was rewarded by Oswald’s deep moans and cries of pleasure.

It wasn't long before Oswald was thrusting back up against him, trying to get him deeper and deeper and impossibly deeper. Oswald wound his arms around his back, gripping him hard and digging his blunt nails into Ed’s skin to leave crescent moons behind that would tell anyone who would look at him that Edward was his, just as the marks Ed had left on Oswald's throat earlier would tell anyone not to touch what was his. For once, Edward was losing all control and he was certain that he had never felt this way before, that he had never been this far gone. A swat team could raid his flat and he wouldn't even notice it.

A part of his brain, buried deep in the back of his mind, realized dully that he was babbling. He was murmuring words of devotion and ecstasy against Oswald's neck as he buried his teeth into that silky skin, spilling from his lips as he felt how Oswald started contracting around him so violently it almost hurt when he came between their bodies, spilling his seed on their stomachs as they were moving against each other, only to pull Edward with him right that same instant. He was vaguely aware of how Oswald's toes curled in the sheets, how his fingers had come up to his shoulder blades, how his fingernails were scratching at his skin at the moment as Ed came undone and found his release inside of Oswald.

He tried not to collapse on top of him right away, tried to keep a bit of his dignity as his lips found Oswald's again, drawing him into another slow, almost lazy kiss while he was carefully riding out his orgasm and drawing little satisfied moans from Oswald as he did. Oswald managed to wrap his arms weakly around his back, pulling away from the kiss only as he needed to gasp for breath. In an ideal world, he would have told Oswald that he loved him now. In an ideal world, he would have found the right words for a situation like this but he couldn't even think of a riddle right now. He was lost in this momentary bliss of having Oswald so close, having him completely to himself for once. Maybe, he wondered, after this, Oswald would stop looking at Jim Gordon as if he had brought the dawn with him.

He really needed to do something about this jealousy of his. It was getting out of hand again.

As he slowly pulled out of Oswald, he drew another little gasp from the smaller man on the bed beneath him and had him roll against him and into his arms, right after he fell down on the mattress beside him. »There is a man in my bathtub.« Ed found himself mumbling after a little while with a small chuckle. He was surprised that Oswald joined him in his humor and at the chuckle that left his throat. »What am I going to do with him now after you don't want to kill him?«

Oswald seemed quite unbothered by this problem of his as he just wormed his way closer into his arms now. The physical contact was more than welcome for Edward as he wound his arms tightly around Oswald now. Honestly, at the moment, he couldn't care less what he was going to do with that guy who had just heard them fucking through the open door. He had Oswald in his arms and that had to mean something - at least for now, at least until his mind would sabotage him again and force him to go after Jim or anyone else.

»You could just let him go … I think hearing us having sex was punishment enough.« Oswald mumbled softly against his shoulder and the way his eyelids were drooping made it painfully clear to Ed that Oswald was very close to losing consciousness. Not that he would have a problem with that.

»He beat you, Oswald and he left you for dead.« As if he needed to be reminded of that. As if he wouldn't know these things himself. As if he could ever forget the night he had been mugged in some dirty alleyway. As if he could ever forget how his friend, Edward Nygma, had pushed a fifty dollar bill into his trembling hands and sent him on his merry way instead of helping him. At least at one point, Ed could now understand Jim Gordon a little better. He knew that Jim would forever be haunted by the day he had seen Oswald in Arkham and his following inaction as Oswald had begged him to help him. Likewise, Edward would from now on forever be haunted by that night when he had refused to help the man he claimed to love in his darkest hour.

»But I'm not dead.« Oswald mumbled almost reassuringly as he found one of Ed’s hands resting on his shoulder and laced their fingers together. The gesture was almost loving. The gesture was almost like something only lovers would share with one another. »Jim found me.«

Jim. Jim fucking Gordon. He couldn't stand hearing that name anymore out of Oswald's mouth with such warmth and adoration! Not even now in such a situation, Oswald could let go of Jim! What would he have to do to get rid of Jim once and for all? _As if you wouldn't know that_ , the voice in the back of his head started taunting again. _You already gathered the dirt, you would only need to place it on him_. He had not forgotten about his plot to get rid of Detective Gordon before good old Jim could find out about Kristen and her shallow grave in the middle of the woods. But he had asked Gordon to look into Strange and until he had found something, he couldn't go through with his plan. Plus, Oswald would never forgive him for putting his favorite detective behind bars - no matter which state Oswald would be in. The sad truth was that Oswald Cobblepot would forever be tied by fate to Jim Gordon, the man who had refused to put a bullet in his head and let him live. And for that, Oswald would forever protect Jim if he could.

The most frustrating thing about realizing this truth was, however, that Jim would never grasp it. Whenever Oswald had claimed that they were friends in the past, he had shrugged the former mobster off and refused to take him seriously. Jim Gordon would never truly understand how important he was to one Oswald Cobblepot. Yet, Oswald looked at him as if he had hung the moon and the stars in the sky.

»And yet« Ed groaned as he changed positions once more. With one hand he grabbed the blanket to pull it over them as he pushed Oswald onto his back once more to lean over him, his eyes narrow as he stared at Oswald out of dark eyes, burying his body underneath his own. »I can't let him get away with hurting you. I will never let anyone get away with hurting you.« Maybe this was the closest he would ever come to say ‘I love you’ to Oswald, at least to this Oswald. He relished the moment as Oswald gently traced his long fingers over his left cheek, dragging his index finger slowly across the firm line of his jaw until he let his hand drop down on the mattress again.

»Let him go.« Oswald asked. He looked tired but there was this smile again that creeped him out so often when he would see it. Ed just sighed and dropped down onto him, burying his nose in the crook of Oswald's neck as he did, unwilling to move another inch.

»Later. let him stew a bit longer in there until he learned his lesson.« He decided quietly because the poisonous voice inside of his mind had already made a new plan. There was something else he could do to this man that wouldn't involve killing him and maybe this would help him with his Gordon problem also. It was Oswald who had given him the idea without realizing it even. Oswald hummed in agreement exhausted from this experience only to fall asleep a few moments later after Ed had reclaimed his position next to him on the bed and pulled him into his arms yet again.

Edward waited for a while, listening to Oswald's deep breathing and the soothing sounds of distress coming from his bathroom before he got up and went to grab his phone. He knew that what he was about to do wasn't the nicest thing and that Oswald would probably not want him to either, but if it meant that he could mark his territory and not have Gordon infringe on it ever again, he would gladly cause Oswald a little embarrassment.

Jim picked up his phone despite the late hour after it rung only two times. He didn't sound sleepy and judging by the noise around him, he was still at the precinct. »Hey, Ed. Whats up?« He tried to sound friendly as he did lately ever since Ed had declared his worries about Oswald to Jim. Was he trying to become his friend again or was this all still just the mockery of friendship from before when they had had double dates together with their respective girlfriends?

»I have news.« Ed answered quietly, stepping away from the bed as far as he could as to not wake up Oswald, which resulted in him leaning against the sink in his kitchenette. »One of the guys who mugged Oswald a little while ago seemed to have followed him here.«

»Is he okay?« The question came swiftly and sounded much more worried than Ed would have expected in the first place. He felt his stomach clench in anger at this. Everything Jim did or said seemed suddenly an affront to him. After all, Jim didn't really care about Oswald. This was just a role he had to fulfill to be seen as the good guy, right? He was Saint James who even had a spot in his heart for a notorious criminal like Oswald Cobblepot. To Jim, it was a blessing that Oswald was now in this state.

»Yeah, he’s asleep now.« Ed replied and gave his best impression of sounding agitated and a little on edge while still trying to remain control. »I caught the bastard as he tried to break into my apartment, knocked him out cold. So if you like to collect him and put him behind bars, you can find him at my place.«

»Why didn't you call the police?«

»Because Oswald wanted me to let him go.« Ed replied. This wasn’t even a lie, after all. »But I can't just let him go. I’m sure you understand.« And, as always, Saint Jim understood, making his life so much easier as he did.

 

**-End of Chapter 8-**


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short hiatus, I was on vacation last week and returned on Monday! However, you can expect the regular updates on Mondays and Fridays to come back next Monday ^^

**Gotham - Edward Nygma’s Apartment**

Jim had expected a great many things when he would walk into Edward Nygma’s apartment with Harvey in tow this late at night, but surely not to find none other than Oswald Cobblepot naked and barely covered with a blanket in Ed’s bed, fast asleep. Ed himself was clad only in a pair of boxer shorts and a loose fitting shirt but Jim thanked all deities he could name that he had at least felt the need to dress himself somewhat before their arrival.

Even to the oblivious, it was all too clear what had transpired between those two guys earlier tonight. He was surprised, to say the least. Of course, he had realized Ed’s attraction towards Oswald quite a while ago already. Really, when he had once woken up in this apartment after Oswald had knocked him out and had found them together playing the piano and singing a silly little duet as if that was just the normal thing to do in a situation like this. However, he had not been entirely too sure that Oswald had felt the same way or that they would end up like this so quickly. There was nothing wrong about it either, of course.

They were both adults and both, hopefully, consenting to this. Although, a bitter voice in the back of his mind quipped, it was debatable how much Oswald's consent was really worth in his momentary state of mind. If they decided to run with the notion that Oswald might have been brainwashed by Strange, maybe even tortured to change his personality so drastically - was he even able to consent to anything? Could they even consider Oswald, though declared sane by a piece of paper, in the right state of mind to consent? Maybe that was just Jim overthinking things and never imagining Oswald as a sexual being, to begin with.

He did his best not to let his surprise show and hoped that Harvey would have the same decency as he walked into the flat after him now.

»Jim, Harvey, I am so glad you could make it.« Ed grinned and he didn't keep his voice down as if he wouldn't care about the fact that Oswald was sleeping as he let in both detectives into his apartment. Everything about his behavior was odd. Would their places be swapped and would it be Lee sleeping naked and barely covered in his bed, he would certainly a) not let anyone in the room where she was sleeping and b) try to be as quiet as possible. Ed though did the sole opposite as if he wanted Oswald to wake up.

»Of course.« Harvey shrugged but neither Jim nor Edward escaped they way Harvey’s eyes shifted back to the bed just shortly or how he tried to keep his voice down now. Harvey would never admit it freely to Jim but his partner liked this new version of Oswald. One might argue that he even felt a little protective over their new errand boy. Twice Jim had already caught Harvey delivering an ass-whooping to one of the cops that would usually taunt Oswald. However, when Jim had confronted him about it once, Harvey had shrugged it off completely and told Jim the same thing Jim had once told him. _Everyone deserves a second chance_. »So where is that bastard?«

»Bathroom.« Ed smirked and pointed at the door only a few feet away from the bed. Harvey just moved on to the bathroom door, maneuvering as if the bed was a nuclear bomb that could explode would either one of them come too close or even breathe in its general direction. Jim followed him shortly but before he could even reach the bathroom, Harvey turned around in the door again to look at Ed with one raised eyebrow, tipping his ridiculous old hat up with one finger slowly.

»Is there any particular reason why he’s naked?« Harvey was not the only one who raised his brows at the sight before him as Jim finally managed to catch a glance over Harvey's broad shoulders now. What he saw before him was certainly not the weirdest thing he had ever seen, not here in Gotham, at least. Still, it was odd, to say the least, to find a bound man, clad only in his underwear lying in Ed Nygma’s bathtub with a sack over his head. Ed seemed not the slightest bit concerned as if nothing about the situation was weird in any way - or incriminating for that matter.

»He was wearing Oswald’s suit.« Ed grinned almost a bit too sheepish and pointed at the heap of dark clothes in the sink. »I thought Oswald surely wanted it back. If you need further proof that this man was one of his attackers, Oswald’s belongings are still inside his suit jacket’s pockets. But I think our friend over here will be all too willing to tell the truth, right?«

There was a moan coming from beneath the sack before Harvey finally pulled the sack from the man’s head now. The man underneath had a mane of mottled grey hair with crumbs of dirt in his unkempt beard. He looked utterly terrified as his eyes darted from Harvey to Jim and up to Edward who was lurking behind Jim. His eyes widened almost comically in horror as he looked at Ed. There was a bit of blood on the back of his head as Jim noticed after Harvey pulled the man up and out of the small bathroom, probably from when Ed had knocked him unconscious.

To Jim, it was certainly not completely out of the realm of possibility that anyone could be afraid of Edward Nygma, but it seemed unlikely. Ed was an oddball, no question about that, but he was a nice guy in general. A nice guy who had been dealt a crappy hand maybe one too many times. And the way Kristen had just left him to go with an, according to Ed, abusive man, had nudged Ed down a few pecks lately.

»Are you the guy who attacked Oswald Cobblepot two weeks ago?« Jim asked the man directly, but he kept his voice calm yet firm as he spoke. At least they didn't need to handcuff him. Edward had seen to this and Jim decided that he didn't wish to know why Edward was in the possession of handcuffs or for what he used them usually.

»Y-Yes!« The man gasped, finally stirring Oswald awake on the bed too. He almost sounded a little too eager to confess to his crime now. Oswald was one heavy sleeper, though. »Yes, I did! I swear!« He seemed panicked, especially as he looked at Ed again who just stood there with a little grin pulling at his lips now. It was too late to bother himself with the reason for that panic the man experienced or that almost a little too sinister grin on Ed’s face. He should have been home hours ago.

»Wonderful.« Jim sighed and patted the man’s naked shoulder. »Harvey would you be so kind and bring him to the car? I need to have a few words with Ed.« As he said these words he noticed how Ed’s face darkened for a second, his eyes narrowed at Jim and wouldn't he know it, he would say that he looked even more menacing without his glasses on. Oswald, however, awoke with a gasp as he finally started to grasp that he and Ed were no longer alone, which left Jim wondering if he had known about the presence of his attacker in the apartment or not. No, better not think about it now. He was just too tired.

»Jim?« Oswald exclaimed suddenly on high alert as he scrambled to pull the blankets around him more closely now. It was an all too human reaction and somehow, Jim was almost certain that the old Oswald would not have scrambled for modesty. »Detective Bullock? Whats … What are you doing here?«

»Just taking this gentleman here into custody, Pal.« Harvey smirked. »Go back to sleep, you didn't miss anything.« No stupid comment about Oswald and Ed, no stupid remark about his nudity. Jim had never been prouder of his partner than he was in this moment as Harvey dragged the man out of the apartment to lead him down to their car.

»Ed« Oswald's voice sounded almost a bit desperate as he turned his attention to his friend - boyfriend? »What's going on?«

But before Ed could say anything, Jim flashed the former terror of Gotham, who now sat in Ed Nygma's bed naked and with his hair all messed up from sleep and previous activities making him appear oddly small, a reassuring smile. »Everything's alright, Oz. I just need to talk to Ed for a second about what happened.«

Oswald was gaping like a fish at Ed, but whatever he wanted to say got stuck in his throat and so Jim and Ed stepped out of the apartment and into the hallway to have some privacy now that Harvey was out of the way as well. As soon as the apartment door was closed behind Ed, Jim turned his full attention back to the forensic scientist who tried his best to look as innocent as a child who had just been caught with their hand in the cookie jar as he stood there.

»What is it, Jim?« Ed asked but he didn't sound hostile or at least he tried not to sound hostile, as he should say. A part of him wanted to confront him about Oswald and his relationship to the younger man, but the more rational part of his brain reminded him of the fact that a) Jim had told Edward to tell Oswald what he felt for him and b) it was none of his business what those two did in the privacy of their own four walls. For all he cared, they could have orgies in there. Still, he couldn't quite shake off his concerns because of the weakened state Oswald was in both physically and mentally.

»I went to see Strange.« Jim sighed finally, pushing his worries and concerns aside for tonight. »I would have told you tomorrow, but since I’m here now anyway, I might as well tell you now, I guess.«

»What did he say?« At least now his demeanor changed back to the serious Ed he knew from working with him. He crossed his arms in the way he often did when they would work cases together while he tried to take in all the details of a murder scene in front of them.

»I tried to gather information as casually as possible, but of course Strange didn't give me anything. The only thing I got from this visit was that he told me he used a new kind of drug on Oswald. When I left, though, one of his experiments had just gouged his eyes out. According to Strange, he was part of the same experimental treatment Oswald had been subjected to, so keep a close eye on him, okay?«

»Sure will.«

»Anyway, I talked to Barnes about it and, of course, there isn't much we can do about it, not enough proof - Heck, no proof at all, that would justify a search warrant for Arkham. So, legally, we don't have much to go on.«

»Legally?« It was impossible not to notice how his voice piped up at that.

»Listen, Ed, I was there. I saw Oswald when he was in there. I saw the other patients that are going through the same treatment, and I talked to Strange. I agree with you, there is something shady going on and I will not let this go. This Professor Strange is giving me the creeps and he sure as hell has some ulterior motive.«

»So?«

»So I will be asking an old friend of mine to get us the information we need.«

»A break-in, you mean.«

»That is exactly what I mean.«

»Wouldn't this be very dangerous? We are speaking about Arkham, after all. That place is a fortress. Literally.« He wanted to make a remark about how even Arkham was only one big puzzle and how Ed surely already knew a way inside but he bit it back. He was not in the mood for banter now. He was tired and hungry and Lee was probably pissed - and rightfully so.

»Don't worry, she is a pro.«

»She?« Edward rose his brows in surprise. »You are not, by chance, referring to Selina Kyle, are you?«

»I am.« And Edward didn't need to say what he was thinking because Jim was thinking the exact same thing. Selina Kyle was a child. Sure, she grew up on the streets and she could take care of herself like most others were incapable of, but she was still a child the same way Bruce Wayne was still a child too and, for Jim’s taste, much too involved in all kinds of dangerous situations already.

It was probably morally highly questionable to have Selina do this for him if she would agree to help him, that was, and yet it was truly his only chance in the long run. Either Selina would help him or this whole plan would fall apart right away. »Listen, I know it's not ideal, but it's the only chance we got to get our hands on his files.«

»Which still wouldn't get you a warrant because of the highly questionable way you got your hands on these documents.« He was right, of course.

»I could claim that they were sent to me anonymously. Selina could send them anonymously to the precinct, maybe to Barnes directly.«

»He will know.«

»Of course, but he wouldn't be able to prove anything.« Like in the Galavan case. Barnes had known in his guts that it had to have been Jim and yet he had never been able to prove it thanks to Oswald's testimony. Maybe that was why he was so willing to help the younger man now. Oswald went to Arkham for him - for a crime they had both committed together. And if it was true what Ed had said and what Oswald had told him when he had first met him there, he had been tortured in this asylum for a murder that Jim had committed, though granted, he was not innocent either. He almost expected Ed to keep arguing with him, but he was pleasantly surprised that he decided not to as he gave a small sigh.

»I suppose it's worth a shot. If it's true that Oswald has been tortured, I want this man to bleed for it.«

»You really do like him a lot.« Jim smirked and quickly wiped that smirk off his own face as he noticed the darkened expression on Ed’s face. »Which brings me to my next point.« Jim hastily continued and cleared his throat. »I’m glad that you finally told him how you feel for him, but I am concerned, as your friend, that sleeping with him might be a bit rushed, considering Oswald’s mental state.«

»He is officially sane.« Ed bit back and Jim could see how much effort it cost him to appear civil and not go at his throat immediately. »He is fully capable of telling me no or to consent to sex.« They both knew that this was not exactly as clean cut as Ed stated it. Sure, Oswald was officially declared sane by Strange, yet they were investigating Strange for the treatment Oswald he received that _made_ him sane, to begin with. Who could truly tell if, would Oswald ever go back to his old self, he would still find nothing wrong with Edward sleeping with him during this vulnerable time of his life. What if he would feel as if he had been abused by Ed in his current state? Then again, that wasn't truly his problem, he assumed. It would be Ed’s in the end.

»You know what?« Jim began and rose his hands in surrender, taking a small step back. »You are right. It's not my place to intervene. You are two consenting adults, and it's none of my business. Just, take it slow, will you?«

»I'm sure Oswald is grateful for your concern.« Ed forced a smile. »And I appreciate it too. We are all friends, after all, right?«

»Yeah, right.« Jim smiled and yet he couldn't shake off the feeling that Edward Nygma was someone he better not put his back to, as he finally left the apartment complex to turn the criminal in their car in and finally go home for the night.

※※※※※※※

»Why did you do that?« The moment Edward stepped back into the apartment, Oswald found the question leaving his mouth. By now, he was at least wearing his boxer shorts again, but he still sat on Ed’s bed, wrapped in one of the large blankets as if it was some kind of armor, all but hiding his body as if Ed had not already seen it. He would rather not think too much about what they did. It wasn't as if he would regret it - not at all. For the first time in his life, he had felt pleasure like this. For the first time in his life, another man had looked at him not like at an object he could gain pleasure through with no concern for his own needs, but as a human being, as something that was beautiful even.

Maybe he shouldn't go quite that far yet, he supposed. Oswald was not by far arrogant enough to even consider himself attractive in any way. He knew that he was a weird bird-like looking man. He was small and scrawny, lacking in muscle and necessary fat. He was anything but beautiful.

»You told me not to kill that guy, but I couldn't have him lie in my bathtub forever and I couldn't let him go either. So, I did the responsible thing and called the cops.« Ed replied as casually as if they were talking about doing the dishes or cleaning the bathroom and not as if he had let Jim Gordon and Harvey Bullock into his apartment while Oswald had been asleep _and_ naked in his bed!

»That's not what I meant, Ed, and you know it!« There was a certain rush of anger shooting through his veins. He wanted to shout at Edward, wanted to attack him, wanted to ask him why he decided to embarrass him like this in front of Jim and Harvey as if it hadn't meant anything that he had been lying naked in Ed’s bed. As if it hadn't meant anything that he had destroyed the trust that Oswald had felt in this bed and put in this man He had felt safe in this bed, in this apartment, in Ed’s arms for the first time in a long while. And then he had to wake up to see Jim and Harvey inside the apartment as he was naked and fast asleep! »Why did you call them over tonight?«

Why did he call _Jim_ over? Why Jim of all people? He would have been embarrassed, either way, no matter who would have come to the apartment, but Jim was a whole different can of worms. And Edward would not be Edward, would he not realize the truth behind his words and immediately go in for the attack.

»You love him, don't you?« The words were spoken with as much calm and clarity as possible, but Oswald could hear and feel the underlying seething hot anger. Edward had proven in the past with Kristen that he was a man who did not accept another next to him, that he was quite jealous whether it was his place to be jealous or not. Then again, wasn’t it his place? Oswald had slept with him, willingly. It was him who had instigated that kiss and now looking back he still knew why he did it.

It was this underlying darkness in Edward that was so very much appealing to this darker part inside of him. The truth was that his darker self, the Penguin, never left him, he only got buried deep down inside and Oswald could still feel him moving inside of his body, slithering like a snake, waiting to strike, waiting for the right opportunity to come back. The thought that this might possibly come true scared him to no end.

Maybe that held especially true after what had happened to him ever since his father died. He should be the owner of the Van Dahl mansion. He should be the sole heir of the fortune and the legacy of this family. Yet, Grace and her children were hogging what was belonging to him like cockroaches and just because his father died before he could change his last will. Fate was cruel.

As he looked up at Edward now, he could almost feel his anger dissipating under his gaze and couldn't quite tell why. There was something lying beneath Edward's eyes that he could not name yet, but whatever it was, it caused him to calm down a bit so that the overwhelming headache that was sure to come could not split his head in half again.

»I do.« Oswald finally answered quietly before he shook his head slightly. »I did.« He corrected himself then and let his gaze slip down at his hands in his lap instead. To his surprise, the bed dipped beside him as Edward sat down on it, an almost apologetic and understanding smile on his lips. »But he has Lee and Lee is wonderful. He couldn't have found a better woman and even if he wouldn't have her, he would never feel the same as I and it would have never worked out anyway. I was a criminal.«

»But you are not anymore.«

»No.« Oswald sighed heavily. »I am not, but what am I now, Ed? I don't have a purpose, I don't know what I want to do, what I can do or what I should do. I am utterly useless and I already hate to be such a burden on you.«

Edward's hand on his cheek was oddly comforting despite that he should be angry with him, livid, even. Something about Edward made it impossible to stay angry at his friend. »You are nothing of that sort, Oswald.« Ed replied and scooted closer, but only to cup Oswald's face with both hands and dip in for a kiss. Though he returned the kiss, he didn't know what to think or feel about it. It was the first time in his life that he was touched like this, kissed like this, treated like this. He didn't know what to make of it. It was almost suffocating, that feeling of being wanted. Nothing was scarier to him all of the sudden, not even the nightmares of the asylum that started to creep in on him more and more often, sometimes even when he wasn't asleep at all.

He tried to give this thing between them a name, but he couldn't come up with anything. What were they to each other? Friends? Lovers? He couldn't name it. The old Oswald surely wouldn't have a problem doing so and taking what he wanted. But what did he want? Ever since he had left Arkham with his mind intact again, nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Shouldn’t it have been the other way around? He didn't know who he was any longer, as if the most crucial part of his self was missing and he dreaded to acknowledge that because what it meant was too crushing, too wrong.

»I shouldn't have called them over without telling you.« Edward finally gave in after he pulled away slowly, remaining close, though. »It wasn't right. I didn't want to embarrass you in front of Jim.« There were things unsaid between them, Oswald could almost taste them in the air, as Edward finally got up from his spot next to him to switch off the lights in the apartment and crawl back into bed with him. »Do you forgive me?« The words sounded a little mocking, but Oswald was sure that this was not what he truly meant.

»Of course.« Oswald hummed as he instinctively moved closer, happy to find Edward's arms open for him willingly. Before silence could fully settle in, Oswald spoke up again quietly. »You know, after I met my father, I was so sure that I finally found my place - without him. Without the Penguin. I was sure that my new life could begin properly, with a new family and new chances. I was so ready to start over and come into my own, to become an apprentice and keep the family tradition going and when he died … When he died everything came crashing back down, you know? It seemed my life fell apart once again just like when my mother died and I was so lost and confused, I didn't know what to do anymore. I hoped that Grace would let me stay but she didn't want to share her home with a criminal. I understand that, yet I wished she would have given me a second chance.«

The kiss that Ed pressed to his forehead was soothing in a way and his arms almost kept Oswald from falling back into the dark hole that he had found himself in after the death of his father. It seemed as if life kept throwing rocks at him and sticks between his legs to make him stumble. Maybe he was being tested. Maybe that was fate trying to find out how much it could push him until he would go back to his old ways until the monster would raise it's ugly head again with a roar. He couldn't deny that he was afraid of that day to come.

In hopes of getting his mind off these sinister topics, he breathed in Edward's scent, not willing to think about the fact that friends should not be this close. In this moment, it seemed not important what they were to each other, only that they found comfort in on each other.

»Do you regret sleeping with me?« It was Ed’s turn to speak up again slowly and Oswald didn't even need to think about his answer.

»Not at all.« He mumbled quietly. »It was the first time I felt like this.«

»But it wasn't your first time.« It was not a question and this alone made him a little nervous. Had it been this obvious? »You knew much too well what you wanted and needed.« Ed explained as if he could feel the panic rising inside of Oswald.

»No it wasn't.« He replied quietly. »But none of my previous encounters have been as pleasant as this.« He didn't wish to remember or think about it. This would just bring back the dark thoughts again and that he couldn't have.

»Then I am glad I could give you this.« Ed murmured into the darkness as they lay on their sides facing each other. He enjoyed the heaviness of Ed’s hand resting on his waist after the taller man had dragged him closer and he was glad that Edward did not ask further questions as he was not ready to answer them. This night, after he fell asleep again in Edward’s warm embrace, he did not dream of the asylum, at least not at first. His dreams were haunted by shadow figures hunting him through an endless maze of dark alleys, past overspilling trash cans. Laughter was roaring in his ears, words that he couldn't quite make out and no matter how fast he ran, those dark fingers and hands always seemed to reach him and burn his naked flesh on impact.

He could still hear the voice whispering in his ear, the same words over and over again. » _No one needs to know._ « They were meant to be soothing, but the only thing they achieved was making his heart pound even faster with anxiety as he recalled over and over and over again what he had been taught in those darkest hours of the night. Lies were bad. Deception was wrong. How could this be good if no one could know about it?

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Jim Gordon's Apartment**

For such a small man, Oswald had a lot of fight in him. That was not new to Jim by any means, of course. He knew Oswald for quite some time, after all, but seeing it on tape like he did now in the privacy of his own little apartment with Harvey looking over his shoulder was something very much different. Oswald fought with his entire being against the nurses and guards as they dragged him to the chair in the middle of the room and were his screams not disturbing enough, Hugo Strange's notes surely took the cake on that one. Everything in Jim wanted Harvey to stop reading them out to him while his eyes were fixed on the screen.

»Everyone can be bent. Everyone can be broken even someone like Oswald Cobblepot. They all break eventually. Everyone has a limit it's just a matter of finding it.« Harvey read over the echoes of Oswald’s pained screams coming from the small TV in Jim’s apartment as Jim could only watch how Oswald was strapped to a chair that looked very much like an electric chair and probably had been one too, in another life.

First, the small man on screen with the sickly pale face and the dark circles under his eyes, had screamed profanities at the people around him, threatening their lives even, now he was screaming in pain through the gag that had been pushed in his mouth. Maybe the worst of this whole contraption was the weird helmet-like construction that Strange’s right-hand woman, Miss Peabody, was not putting on Oswald’s head. »His notes go on and on and on like this, Jim.« Harvey sighed. »Seems Nygma was right.«

»You don't say.« Jim breathed as he finally had enough of the tape the moment Oswald seemed to have passed out from the pain after endless minutes of him writhing in wild spasms in this chair, his fingers clawing at the armrests as if he was suffering a seizure. After he had switched off the TV, the silence was deafening and left him defenseless against the guilt weighing him down suddenly. As if Harvey could read his mind, which he probably could at this point, he put a hand on his shoulder. He didn't say that it wasn't Jim's fault, he didn't say something like »You couldn't have known he was telling the truth« and Jim was thankful that he didn't because both of that would be blatant lies.

Oswald had never really lied to him in the past. He was a criminal, yes, but he had always been honest, never tried to sugarcoat anything and he had helped him and this city when he needed him the most without making a big deal out of it, even went to Arkham, somewhat willingly or at least without putting up much of a fight for Jim’s sake. And when Oswald had needed him in return, he hadn't been there. He hadn't believed him. Seeing that now, seeing how much he had endured in this hospital, he felt sick.

»I think I need to throw up.« He breathed quietly as he glanced at the file in Harvey’s hand. Oswald's file was almost as thick as his wrist and contained absolutely everything they needed. It contained every bit of personal information about Oswald that was known - Jim had never known that Oswald was a Gemini, but it explained a lot - and every note that Strange had ever written about Oswald and his treatment or their endless conversations.

Some of it were just thoughts of the Professor about Oswald, like that what Harvey just read to him, some of it were notes on his treatment or his therapy sessions or his behavior and how it went from hostile to docile in the span of these past few months that Oswald had spent in Arkham and was subjected to this horrible torture that they had just witnessed on tape.

Every detail about his treatment was noted and every time Oswald had been injured in any way, every time he had felt unwell. Every confession Oswald had made in the privacy of Strange’s office, every embarrassing detail of his life. According to these notes, Oswald had spent entire days in bed after his first therapy with this strange apparatus, unable to move or speak or even eat. At one point he had experienced something like a stroke during the session even but to Strange that had been worth nothing more than a small footnote.

»He could have died in there, Harvey.« He found himself mumbling again. He should be glad, of course, after all, Oswald was just one more criminal. Yet, he had a hard time thinking like that after spending so much time with Oswald as a friend these past couple of days now.

»We will get him, Jim.« Harvey promised and sounded honest enough now. »He will pay, don't worry.« Of course, he worried. Weasels like Strange always found a way. They always managed to get away and that made him sick to the stomach especially later as Harvey left and thus forced Jim to face his thoughts alone. Lee was staying longer at the precinct, working on an abduction of some drug dealer because the results were needed urgently, leaving Jim alone with a glass of scotch and Oswald’s file.

There were photos. Maybe those photos were even worse than the tape itself. By this point, Jim couldn't even tell for certain anymore. The first set of photos was form Oswald's first day at Arkham, showing him undressed down to his underwear with a sour expression on his face that clearly told stories about the revenge he was plotting at that moment.

They showed him from each angle and comparing it to what he had seen in the showers, Oswald had looked a lot healthier despite having been living on the streets for a few weeks and hiding from the cops. Every two weeks Strange had taken these kinds of photos of Oswald and the changes were undeniable. In the end, the last set of photos, he didn't even look like the old Oswald anymore. His entire posture had changed, even his face as he had looked in the camera. Had he stood proud and upright before, he now stood with his back arched and his shoulders slumped, only the hollow shell of the man he once was.

Jim hated nothing more than the bruises he saw on some of those photos with burning hot passion. According to this file, he had suffered a great deal of injuries during his time in Arkham and to no surprise, really. He was foul-mouthed and small at the beginning of his stay, hardly a match to some of the brutes in there. He stopped reading the file when he came to one of Strange’s notes that made his blood run cold with just one sentence “evidence of sexual abuse through the staff”.

That was what it took to make Jim throw his glass at the nearest wall.

 

**-End of Chapter 9-**


	10. Chapter 10

**Gotham - Gotham Central Library**

Maybe it was not his place to interfere. Maybe it was not on him to dig up some dirt on this case. Maybe Oswald wouldn't want him to. Then again, Oswald probably wouldn't have wanted Ed to go to Jim and tell him to dig up dirt on Strange either, on his good old friend Hugo Strange. The old Oswald wouldn't have appreciated it at all would Ed have gone behind his back to investigate anything that had anything to do with Oswald himself. And the new Oswald? He would probably not like it much either, he guessed while he was filing through the old newspapers in the local library. Then again, he didn't care if Oswald would get angry at him. Anger was a good thing in this regard. Anger was exactly what Oswald now needed and if anger would bring Oswald back to him, he would gladly enrage him to the point of bursting and throwing things at his face.

And unlike Oswald, he would not just give up and take every hit life aimed at him. He knew that his research might be futile and that he might not be able to find anything and that there were more important things to worry about. Yet, as he finally found what he had been looking for, Ed Nygma felt as if he had just discovered the holy grail and with it the instrument that would bring Oswald back to him.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

He was restless. This was not an entirely new thing for him to feel, but it was new in his current condition - or state of being, how Ed liked to call it. The new Oswald didn't grow restless and he didn't seek out fights to ease his mind. And yet he found himself snapping at the cops of the precinct every now and then when they would throw a mocking comment at him. It was completely uncalled for either and he knew that as he later walked into Ed’s office, finding his friend sitting at his desk now. Surely, he had already heard how badly Oswald had been behaving the entire day. Then again, Oswald knew his friend well enough to realize that, if anything, Ed would celebrate him acting up a little.

It was no secret to Oswald, that Ed wanted the Penguin back, after all. And he did his best to shove away the thoughts and worries about what this made them for as long as he was not the Penguin. Could Edward Nygma ever love him the way he was now?

Ed smiled as he stepped into the room, but there was something off about him and Oswald … He just … He did not care. He could not care. He didn't want to care. He was restless. He could feel something claw at his insides trying desperately to find a way out, he felt it scratching at the inside of his skull. It was not even a proper headache but certainly something that was there, moving inside his head causing him a great deal of discomfort.

»You look stressed, Oswald.« Ed remarked when Oswald fell down heavily on one of the chairs on the other side of Ed’s desk. It was the same chair he always occupied these days when they would have lunch together. After he had let out a deep sigh, Ed just got up from his own chair behind the microscope on his desk and walked around the desk only to sit on the edge of it in front of Oswald.

As Ed extended his hand to him to caress his cheek gently, Oswald almost forgot what bad a day he had and he could only assume that this was how it was meant to feel between lovers. Would it have felt like this with Jim too? It was unfair to think of Jim when he was with Edward but he could just not help himself. Maybe a part of him would always be in love with James Gordon for some reason or another.

Oswald had no clue how his friend, Edward, really felt for him, but he certainly hadn't just slept with him for no reason other than boredom. That was just not who Ed was and no one could ever convince him that this was the case. »Tell me what happened. If Alvarez made fun of you again, I tell Jim, as you made it very clear to me that you don’t wish me to lure him into an alley and beat him to death.« This almost made him smile. Edward was always so protective of him and he found that very endearing, that was why he leaned into the touch and didn’t pull away. For a moment, he just wanted to enjoy this. He felt calmer now.

This right here was something that he would never have with Jim Gordon and not just because the man was going to marry Lee and be a father. Even if not, they would have never worked out the way he and Edward could work out. Maybe thinking like this was not right. Maybe thinking like that was unfair to Ed.

»No … I mean, yes … But that's not what makes me so upset - I mean, I am not upset, of course! I just … I am … I feel so restless.«

»I know that feeling.« Ed smiled softly before he gently pulled Oswald from his chair only to wrap his arms around his back and pull him against his chest to soothe him and gently rub small circles into his back as Oswald was now standing between his legs. »It will pass.« He said but somehow Oswald doubted that he really meant it.

If anyone was always restless, it was Edward Nygma and yet, Oswald was very inclined to just believe his friend, believing that Edward would not mindlessly lie to him for no reason. They stayed like this for a while before Ed let go of Oswald slowly and waited for him to sit back down again on his stupid little chair.

For a moment, he wanted to tell him about that darkness he could feel vibrating inside of him but he was afraid of Ed’s reaction to it. Would he be excited to hear that his old friend the Penguin was still inside of his mind? Still clawing at him and trying to find a way to regain control? Edward would love that and he would do anything to get the Penguin back. The thought alone pained him in more than just the emotional way. He didn't wish to find out and at least Edward seemed to have other plans as well as he suddenly cleared his throat. He looked quite serious all of the sudden as if there was something he needed to say but didn't know if he really should. That was rare for someone like Ed Nygma.

»There is something I need to tell you, Oswald. Ed began and scratched his neck shortly.

»What is it?«

»It's about your stepmother, Grace.« Before Oswald could even begin to grasp what he was saying, Ed continued quickly enough. »What you told me about your father's death didn't leave me alone, so I started digging. Oswald, your stepmother had three other husbands before your father and all of them died. Two had accidents, the third had a heart attack like your father.«

»What do you mean?« The words were nothing more than a small little whisper as he could still not fully grasp what Ed was trying to tell him. No, that was not true. Deep down inside, he knew exactly what he meant and, furthermore, that he was right. But these were thoughts that he just could not allow himself to have. Those were bad thoughts. _See no evil, do no evil._  He wasn’t that person anymore. Certainly, it was a coincidence. Grace just had had bad luck.

»Oswald … Did the thought that your father might have been killed ever occur to you?«

»I don't … What?« He shook his head and turned back to Ed with an uncertain little smile tugging on his lips. »Why would anyone do this? That’s ridiculous, Ed.« He even tried a small little laugh to underline the joke, but all it seemed to do was to anger Ed.

»Oswald, you said it yourself!« Ed frowned. »Your father said in front of his family of leeches that you are his only blood relative! They panicked! They wanted his money and for that, they would have either get him out of the way before he changed his last will or you!«

Deep down he knew that Edward had a point. His father had drunk from his glass. His father had not been supposed to drink alcohol and yet he had done so that night and then he had died. Tragic coincidence or murder? He didn't want to think that Grace had killed her husband because that would mean that she had wanted to kill him in the first place. _See no evil, do no evil_. He shook his head again before he rose to his feet and slowly took a step back and away from Ed. »No.« He breathed and dragged a hand over his face. »No, she didn't kill my father, Ed! And I really don't like it that you shove your nose in my family affairs!«

He didn't know where this reaction suddenly came for, only that he felt this burning hot anger vibrating inside of him. He wanted to lash out on someone. He wanted to scream and shout at Ed for daring to interfere with his family, for daring to get involved when no one had asked him to and for ripping open old wounds once more. Then again, those wounds were far from being old anyway. He was still devastated by his father's death after he had just met him so shortly before he perished. He still wished he would have had more time with him.

Life was just so unfair. He still wished he could have been a better son to his father and proven to him that he could be good, that his father could be proud of him. But in the end, his father had died knowing that Oswald was a criminal of the highest rank in this city. And though he had not held it against Oswald, the former kingpin of the underworld still felt like a complete failure.

Grace wasn’t to blame for it. It was him. He had brought this upon his father. He had infected him with his darkness and his poor old father had died.

He had not been able to protect his mother from Galavan and his sister Tabitha and he had not been able to save his own father when he had needed him the most. He still saw his father in front of him, writhing on the ground in agony with foam coming out of his mouth. He had not been able to do anything at all, just sat there and held him in his arms as he had died.

And couldn't he blame Grace for throwing him out? She was a grieving widow! She had been terrified by what the newspapers wrote about him before his time in Arkham! Every loving mother would have wanted to protect her children from a man like the Penguin.

»Grace would have never hurt my father!« He spit and it felt like he was spitting acid. »She loved him! We all loved him! His death was a tragedy and nothing more!« Just one more tragedy in his miserable little life as it seemed. By now, he should be used to them. And he should have known that his friendship with Edward would probably end in tragedy too. His head was swimming at these thoughts. He felt sick but he couldn't quite tell why. The pain, however, felt familiar. It was the same kind of pain he remembered from his days in Arkham. Not from his special therapy, though. No, this kind of pain was different as a whole. He felt the noise coming out of his throat more than he heard it. A pained, nauseous, desperate little sound.

»Oswald?« Edward was quick to bridge the distance between them and only then did he realize how he was pressing the heels of his hands into his temples. »What's wrong?« He didn't respond. He couldn't respond. The only thing that he could do was to step away from Edward - Edward, whose face suddenly looked all warped and distorted like the face of a demon from his worst nightmares - and leave his office as fast as he possibly could without tripping over his feet. He could hear voices calling out for him, but only very dull and warped. If anything, those voices prompted him to run faster and not stop to look at whoever called out to him.

When he finally stopped he had reached a bar that he didn't recognize at first. He had no idea how he got there but his breathing was ragged and he was panting as if he had run. The interior was dark and dusty like almost every bar he had ever set foot into. Four tables with a set of two chairs each were set up alongside the wall opposite of the bar. At this hour in the day, the bar was not that well visited but the few patrons that were inside and drinking away their lives already looked at him with suspicion.

Suddenly, he became aware what bar this was and the memory of it almost shook him as much as seeing Butch Gilzean sitting on one of the barstools at the at the counter and staring at him out of hooded eyes. He felt as if he was stumbling right into a scene from his past, a scene that now seemed decades away and yet playing on repeat in his head over and over and over again. It was here, in this bar, that Oswald first met Butch Gilzean. Back then, he had been desperate to find work, desperate to get in touch with someone with power and that he had right here. He would have done anything for money and status back then. _Anything_.

The worst about it was that he had done _anything_ it had taken. Even if that had meant to sell away his dignity.

»Oswald?« Only Butch’s voice managed to pull him back into the here and now and before he knew it, he found himself hobbling over to Butch and take a seat at the counter too. He couldn't grasp why, but Butch Gilzean was suddenly the lighthouse in this stormy sea he found himself on, crushed by waves as big as houses. It was just like it had been back then. He was desperate for some clarity. »The hell are you doing here? Heard you were working for the cops now.« His words were accompanied by a snort but still, Oswald didn't quite manage to say anything. »Oswald? Hey … Everything alright? You look ready to puke.«

»I … I never understood why you took me under your wing all those years ago.« The words just escaped him without his own doing. »I never understood why you introduced me to Fish and helped me to find a way into the mob.«

Butch seemed surprised by his words at first, but then he turned back to his beer with another small snort of pure disdain towards his person. »Believe me, I wished I had never done it.«

»But why did you?« He didn't know why this question was suddenly burning on his mind so badly that he just had to find an answer. His head was still swimming but he felt a little better in the presence of Butch, in the presence of his old friend. Butch knew him longer than anyone else who was still alive.

Suddenly Butch clicked his fingers at the barkeeper. »A beer for my little friend here.«

»No … Butch … I-«

»Come on, you look like you need it.« Butch finally sighed just as the barkeeper put the beer in front of Oswald. »I admit that I wouldn't have cried for you if Tabitha had killed you the other day, but I am a man able of forgiveness too, Oswald. We have a history. We have a troubled past, you and me. True, sometimes I regret ever introducing you to Fish, but I saw what you did for this city as the king of the underworld because I was right there with you for a while. I should have never gone against you and helped Tabitha and her brother.« _So, Tabitha has dumped him, hasn’t she?_ There it was again, that dark voice in the back of his head that only made his headache worse. »I can admit my mistakes and it seems this new you can do the same. So, let's not talk about the past, alright? Let's just say, I saw something in you that I thought could be beneficial and for a while it was.«

Oswald found himself shut up for once and just keep his silence for a moment or two. »And do you still see something in me that could be beneficial?«

»In this new you? No. The old you … I could have imagined you to do great things with this city. But this new you … It's a miracle you are still alive.« Butch then huffed. »I've heard what happened, you know? About your dad and about you being mugged. Something like this would have never happened to the Penguin.« Butch clapped his shoulder and though he should feel relieved to hear that, he didn't. »Gotham is a rough place and everyone you ever slighted is out for blood. This new you won’t survive the rest of the year. But this is not why you came here, right?«

»I don't know why I am here. I didn't plan on coming here. I just … I … I don't know.« The sigh that escaped Butch was that of someone long-suffering and wishing not to be here at all. It was the sound only a person mad that desperately did not want to care. Yet, Butch Gilzean was one of the good guys. Well, whatever that meant. He could understand that reaction even, though the old Oswald would have probably been affronted by it.

»I know that I am going to regret this.« He mumbled into his glass as he then emptied it only to order another. »Tell me what happened.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

Jim wouldn't deny that he had walked into the precinct with a funny feeling in the depths of his stomach that day. After he and Harvey had taken a good look at the evidence that Selina had brought them, they had packaged it all up and sent anonymously to Captain Barnes’ office. He knew that Barnes was not stupid and that he would understand quickly enough that this was Jim’s doing, but he had been careful not to leave any traces of evidence of his own doing. Maybe that would be enough to convince Barnes to move forward in this.

He had hardly slept through the night. The things he had seen and the things he had read had haunted him all through it. Worse enough what had been done to Oswald at the asylum but even worse seemed to have been the notes about his therapy sessions with the professor about his childhood. Now that he knew so much more, he actually felt uncomfortable even thinking of meeting Oswald at the station again. How was he supposed to look him in the eyes when he knew what he had been through all his life? Maybe it was not fair to think that way.

He knew from working for the police for so long a time, that the last a victim of abuse would want was pity. The last the victim of crimes as bad as those Oswald had suffered would want was that the people around them would look at them differently. Oswald was still Oswald and what he had suffered through earlier in his life, would never excuse his crimes. It explained his hunger for power, though. He strived for power because he never had power as a child.

He wondered if this new Oswald would be different in his reaction, but the old Oswald would have been mortified would he ever learn that the things he had told Strange were now public knowledge. There were no secrets kept at the GCPD and soon people would start to look at him differently and saying things like ‘no wonder he turned out the way he did’. The old Oswald would have reacted with violence but what would this new version of his do?

Harvey and him exchanged a glance as Jim reached his desk, but before he could even begin talking to his partner as if nothing had happened at all last night, there was shouting coming from the bullpen.

»Oswald!« It was Ed Nygma’s voice tearing the usual hustle and bustle of the precinct to shreds as he stumbled out of his office. Only then did Jim see Oswald Cobblepot, almost running out of the building, his right foot dragging after him worse than ever. »Oswald wait!« But Oswald didn't listen and was out of the building before Nygma could do anything about it. For just a second, Jim thought about running after him. Instead, he found himself walking back down into the bullpen where Ed stood dragging a hand through his hair. Just as he was about to walk back to his office, Jim stopped him.

»Hey, Ed.« He announced his presence. »What happened?« He could see that Ed wanted to snark at him from the way Ed turned around to meet his eyes as Jim dared to put a hand on his shoulder. Jim all but waited for Ed to snap at him. He didn't have to wait long.

»Thats none of your business, Gordon.« Ed grunted and shook him off. Quickly, Ed tried to escape him as he walked into the office but Jim trailed after him before he could close the door. »What do you want now? I am truly not in the mood to talk now.« Which was odd, considering that those words came from none other than Ed Nygma, Mr. Talkative himself.

»I wanted to tell you that Selina managed to steal evidence from Strange. It's currently in Barnes’ office.« He decided to change the topic and quickly try to act as if he had not just witnessed that scene that had unfolded between Edward and Oswald. Apparently, it worked as Edward’s posture changed drastically causing him to whirl around to look at him now again. His words had sparked his interest and seemed to have made Edward forget about his argument with Oswald at least for a second. »Harvey and I had a look at it last night. In my opinion, it's enough to warrant to put this guy behind bars right away but at least it's enough to start searching the asylum. Now we only have to wait for Barnes’ verdict.«

He could tell that Ed was curious, that he might even be affronted that Harvey had seen the evidence but not him as Oswald’s boyfriend. »Is it that bad, yes?« Ed opted instead for the more mature thing to ask and the worry in his eyes was undeniable which made Jim wonder how much Oswald had told his boyfriend about his time in Arkham - or how much he remembered.

»Pretty bad, yes.« He replied with a frown, wondering what he could honestly even tell Edward about the things he had seen and read without having Ed storming off to rip Strange so shreds. »So, what was this fight with Oswald about? He seemed quite angry as he left.«

»I tried to talk to him about his father’s.«

»What was wrong with it?« He did not remember much only the little things Oswald had been willing to tell him. He had met his father and just days later the old man had died. Would he still be dealing with the Penguin, he wouldn't have doubted it for a second that he had killed his own father.

»What was wrong was that I don't believe that it was just a heart attack and his sickness catching up with him.« Edward replied with a frown and a sigh as he slumped down on his chair.

»And what brings you to this conclusion?«

»That his stepmother had three other husbands before his father and they all died as well.« It was suspicious for certain, but tragic coincidence was not out of the realm of possibility either. It never was.

»Maybe his stepmother is just very unlucky?« He tried but they both knew that this was very improbable. »So let me guess, you tried to introduce this idea to Oswald and he became angry and started defending his stepmother.«

»Exactly. I haven't seen him this angry in a very long time.«

In a long time meant since he came out of Arkham and they both knew that this was what Ed meant to say. This should be worrisome for Jim too but he could just not bring himself to worry whether Oswald would return to his former self or not. Maybe it would be better if he would. This city, this world was no place for this small friendly person he became through torture, brainwashing and drugs. This city, after everything he had learned about Oswald since yesterday, would chew him up and spit him out. He didn't like it. Of course, he didn't like it. He should be glad that Oswald was no longer a criminal but now he knew why he had turned out the way he did. Maybe he had never had a choice in that matter. Maybe he had never had the chance to become a good person. Maybe this new Oswald was just the Oswald they would have gotten had he not been bullied in school, had he not been assaulted as a child, had he not been forced to commit petty theft and paid the price for it, had he not been forced to sell himself to gain money to make his mother proud.

The Penguin might be Jim’s enemy, but it had been the Penguin who had saved Oswald in the past over and over again. After reading everything, Jim had come to understand that the Penguin was more than a name. It was not just a persona either. The Penguin was the armor that Oswald had been wearing ever since he started to rise to the top. Maybe it had always been there.

»He will come back around and as soon as this Strange-dilemma is resolved, I will have a look into the death of his father.« He could see that Edward wanted to say something to him but decided not to in the end. Instead, he swallowed what he had on his tongue and just nodded sharply. Just as Jim walked back up to his partner, he saw how Barnes’ door swung open from the inside and the burly man appeared in the door frame, his eyes immediately falling on Jim.

»Gordon, Bullock, in my office, _now_.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Edward Nygma's apartment**

Edward waited patiently this evening. This was, at least, what he was telling himself. In reality, he was pacing through his apartment like a madman the darker it got outside. He hadn't heard from Oswald since their argument earlier that day and that was increasingly more and more worrying to him by the minute. What if something had happened to him? What if he had been caught by some of his old enemies? What if he was already dead? Would he tomorrow walk into the morgue and find Oswald lying on the slab?

So, the second he heard his spare key in the lock of his apartment door, he was back on his feet again but caught himself before he could run over to the door like a lovesick teenager. He wanted to, though, as was evident by how much his hands were fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. And yet, though he had tried to stand his ground and not do anything, the moment Oswald had stepped into the apartment, Ed was with him and his hands around Oswald's jaw, his lips on those of the smaller man. The reaction came as unexpected to him as it came to Oswald and as he pulled away again, he was just as breathless as the shorter man.

»I was worried.« He breathed as if his actions had not communicated this clearly enough. »Where were you the entire day?«

Oswald actually smiled timidly at him now and caught Ed’s hands before they could completely slip from his face to hold them there, cupping his face. His hands were cold and Ed all too eager to warm them if he would get the chance. »I’m sorry.« Oswald breathed. »I didn't wish to worry you. I just needed to clear my head.« At that, Oswald let go of his hands. Yet, Ed left them where they were a moment longer, before he helped him out of his coat.

»It's okay.« Ed sighed. »I should have never embarked on your privacy like I did. Of course, you would get angry, I should have anticipated that and I am sorry. After all, I know what anger and other negative emotions do to you and I didn't mean to cause you discomfort.« For just a second, Edward was certain that Oswald wanted to say something important, but then, he quickly seemed to decide against it with a small smile.

It was much later that same night that Ed found himself resting beside Oswald on his comfortable bed, his back propped up against a few cushions and Oswald’s head resting on his naked chest. He felt still sweaty and pleasantly exhausted and Oswald certainly felt the very same way judging by how he was resting on him right at that moment. He loved the skin on skin contact with Oswald after sex and the way their bodies melted into each other all too perfectly.

The last thing he wanted to do, as he was now gently combing through Oswald's black hair, was to ruin the mood, but as he looked at Oswald now, he felt the urge to tell him the truth about the investigation against Hugo Strange, despite the fact that he knew that Oswald would not be happy about it. Still, tomorrow Oswald would learn about it anyway and he would be interrogated by Barnes himself in no time. He didn't want Oswald to stumble into the precinct tomorrow and find himself the center of attention because everyone would already know about the Strange-case. And yet he looked so beautiful like this, all crumpled up and ruffled like a bird. He was certainly not attractive by traditional standards but to Ed he was one of the most gorgeous people he had ever met.

»What are you thinking about, Ed?« It was Oswald who first broke the silence because even in the state he was in, he could see what was going on around him. Oswald would always see right through him and most others around him as well.

»I need to tell you something. I meant to tell you earlier but then this« He pointed at their naked bodies. »came between it.«

»Now you have me concerned.«

»It's not … It's nothing bad, not really anyway.« Ed sighed. At least this time, Oswald could not just storm out so easily. Still, he had already reacted pretty badly earlier to what Ed had told him about his stepmother. What would be do now would he learn about that investigation? »I just wanted you to know before you come in tomorrow and learn it from someone else. Barnes received a bunch of evidence against Strange anonymously, including your file. Jim and Harvey are now investigating him and Arkham.«

»Investigation?« His head shot up and the much wanted bodily contact was broken apart all too suddenly. Edward felt a lot colder right away »But why? For what?«

»Oswald … You said it yourself, remember? The methods he used on you and the other patients ... it's not right.« Ed tried to pull him back in again as Oswald sat up beside him looking all confused. »It was torture, Oswald.«

»But he helped me!«

»He brainwashed you! He made you forget who you really are!«

»That is me!« Oswald replied frustrated and pointed at himself before planting his hand flat on his naked chest. He could still make out the scar from the bullet wound Tabitha Galavan had once left in his shoulder. »This is the real me! The other one … The Penguin … I don't need him anymore! I can be myself now! And I know you don't like that! I know you want him back!«

»I want _you_ , Oswald!« He groaned. It was true what he said but that would be the worst thing he could tell him now in this situation for certain. »I want you like you are, the bad and the good - everything! And that never changed!«

 _Don't make a mistake now_ , the voice inside of him warned. _Don't take things too far now, Ed!_

»I loved you from the start, Oswald! I was fascinated by you when we first met, I loved you when I had you here with me! Even when you were annoying and kept bugging me at work, I still loved you! Yes, it is true that I was fascinated by your darkness and the danger, but first and foremost I was fascinated by you and that didn't change! You are still that Oswald I fell for! You are much stronger than you think you are. Look at you! You got back to your feet again, despite being mugged and beaten and pushed away by your family! You are still here and I want this investigation to happen, Oswald. I want Strange to suffer. I would go and strangle him to death myself for what he did to you, for how much pain you had to suffer through because of this man! And I know that your heart still belongs to Gordon and that you cannot let go of him but … I won’t give up.« The moment he closed his mouth he was already regretting what he had said just now.

Oswald's silence following his confession was even worse than anything he would have expected. Suddenly, Ed felt like he had before Kristen again. Suddenly, he was back to being the freak in the lab coat, the butt of the GCPD’s jokes. Ed already swung his legs over the edge of his bed to get his boxer shorts from the ground and start redressing, feeling suddenly exposed and vulnerable, as Oswald suddenly touched his shoulder and made him pause in his action.

His blue eyes were clear and all too captivating to look away at this very moment when all he really wanted to do was to pull him back into a kiss and not let go until Oswald wouldn’t even know who Jim Gordon was anymore. »You mean that?« Oswald finally found his tongue again and his words sounded so hopeful that it was almost heart-wrenching to realize that Oswald had probably not expected anyone to ever feel this way for him.

»I do.« He replied honestly as he moved back to his previous position and cupped Oswald’s pale face with his much larger hands. He tried to swallow his concerns and the sick feeling in his stomach that started bubbling up to the surface as he realized that Oswald would take anyone who promised to love him no matter to whom his own heart truly belonged.

Edward was a greedy man, though. He would take what he could get, even if it wasn't quite real.

 

**-End of Chapter 10-**


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a short one but I didn't want to stretch it unnecessary just for the sake of it. The next chapter, though, well strap in for a ride, my lovely birdies

_There was a face hovering above him. He could see it through the veil of the flickering specks of lights that were dancing on the water between his face and that of the man above him. He knew the face. At least he thought that he should know that face. He was certain that he had seen it before. That he had felt those hands before. Though, he could not say if it was a vision of his darkest nightmares or reality flashing him her cruel crooked smile. However, the face was blurry through the water and he couldn't quite see it, couldn't quite make out the features that were staring back at him, couldn't quite recognize the color of his eyes._

_The light kept dancing on the water and Oswald enjoyed sinking deeper and deeper into the cold water of the bathtub. The baths were always cold, never hot in Arkham. He was never alone, always with one of the nurses keeping watch beside him, their hands upon him day and night with no way to escape them._

_It wouldn't matter if he would scream and shout or if he would fight it. Underwater no one would be able to hear him scream anyway. The water made his movements sluggish and almost impossible to fight the man who was holding him down. Wait … He was not holding him down, was he? He was drowning. He felt like drowning. But the light kept dancing on the water surface and lulling him into the water’s peaceful embrace._

_Oswald thought about closing his eyes and let the water fill his nose and his lungs until the voices in his head would stop screaming. But when he would close his eyes, the mumbling from the other patients would come back, the scratching and clawing at the walls around him, at the insides of his skull. The hands would come back that would touch him, that would grab at him and pull him out from underneath his bed. The shadows would come back to haunt him, the darkness would seep back into him and taint him forever, the blood would come back running down his legs._

_Outside the sun was sinking on the horizon and the moon took back it's reign over his life like it always did. And with the night came the shadows and the blood that was fogging the water. »No one has to know.« The voice was dull and soft in his ears through the water. »No one has to know, Oswald. This can be our little secret.«_

_And the hands were back on his skin again, burning right through it, etching the marks of their fingers into his bones and his flesh, marking him forever. »No one has to know. You will feel better after this.«_

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham Central Hospital**

There was no denying that the night had escalated quite badly, by the time they arrived at the hospital, which was probably the last place he wanted to be under any circumstance. And not only because no one in their right mind was a fan of hospitals but mainly because the Gotham Central General was one big dirty shithole.

He had been awoken by screams and jaunty movements next to him in his bed. Ed had jolted upright in an instant. Next to him, Oswald had been thrashing in bed, tormented by what he could only assume to have been a nightmare at this point. His first instinct had been to wake him up and thus ripping him out of the horror he had been living through but that hadn't quite seemed to work. He had tried shaking him awake, tried to pull him in his arms, but all this seemed to have done was to keep him from thrashing and screaming his lungs out for a moment or two. However, as the screaming had stopped, Ed had realized that this had been more than just another nightmare.

He had called Lee Thompkins before he had been able to think twice about it when Oswald had started to gasp for air like a fish on land to fill his lungs without any success, his lips turning blue. Now they were here in this god-awful hospital in the middle of Gotham, waiting for Oswald to regain consciousness. It hadn't been a stroke, that was a plus, Ed assumed. At least that was what the doctor had told them a little while ago. Yet, he found himself ripping at his own hair and brushing his fingers through it over and over, worried sick for the man in the narrow bed behind that window. Oswald was as pale as his bedsheets with tubes and wires sticking out of him to monitor him closely. Ed hated every minute of it.

The one moment he had been perfectly content to lie in his bed with the man he loved in his arms, the next they were rushing to the hospital with blood gushing out of Oswald’s nose and a tube sticking out of his throat.

By now, sunlight had battled through the clouds to shine through the dirty windows of the Gotham General. The warmth that hit his face failed to warm his chest though as he could only look down on Oswald’s sleeping face through that window of his room that was keeping Ed away from him. He was no family member, after all, and the doctors were unreasonably strict about their policy when it came to who got access to a room on the intensive care. It had been some kind of fit, some kind of attack he had suffered from but the doctors were just as clueless as any of them. The doctors didn't know why or where it had come from, and Ed, for his part, could only suspect that it had something to do with the news of Strange being investigated.

It could be humbug, of course. But this attack, this fit, this whatever it was … It had shaken Edward to the core. What he had told Oswald last night was the truth. He loved him and he didn't wish to see him in pain like he had last night. Maybe the news that Strange was being investigated by none other than his good friend Jim, had triggered something deeply buried in Oswald’s subconscious. That was the theory anyway.

Of course, having Jim to be a part of this was a pain in the ass but that had been expected. Jim, always the dutiful policeman, had not waited a moment after the ambulance had taken Oswald to the hospital to question Ed about what exactly had happened. Lee had accompanied Oswald during the ride instead of Edward, his boyfriend (If they were going to call it that). And Ed, always the thorn in Jim's side, had described the last evening in excruciating detail until Jim had stopped him before he could go into details about how he had fucked Oswald stupid. Apparently, even for Jim Gordon, there was a limit to the level of detail he longed to hear in a story.

»He has to speak to Barnes about Strange.« None other than Jim Gordon ripped him from his dire thoughts. »We can only do so much when we start the investigation. We need Oswald to give his testimony officially. No funny business this time, Ed. If we are going to do this, we have to play it by the book.«

Ed couldn't help but roll his eyes at that as he took another sip from the god-awful stale vending machine coffee that Jim had so generously got for him a few minutes ago before he had joined Ed in front of Oswald’s room. At least it was hot.

»You are aware that even the information about this investigation succeeded in delivering Oswald to the ER with some form of seizure by the age of thirty-one, yes?« He didn't wish to sound bitter, he didn't wish for his voice to sound so biting. After all, he still had a role to play if he didn't want Jim to ever poke his nose in the whole Kristen Kringle mess again. And yet, the man he loved lay only a few feet away from him with a tube down his throat and possible brain damage and Jim had the audacity to talk to him about Strange.

»Who asked me to look into Strange and his work at Arkham, Ed? You did. So don't you freakin’ dare to blame me now. Nobody could’ve known that he would have that strong a reaction and if you would know what I know now, you wouldn't hesitate another second to go to Arkham and rip this man apart piece by piece.«

He sounded earnest, at least. As Ed finally tore his eyes away from the glass to look at Jim, the detective looked as if there was something on his mind that he desperately wanted to tell Ed but, in the end, he decided not to. He couldn't suppress the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach that he already knew what Jim wanted to say but couldn't muster up the strength to go through with.

»He was raped, wasn't he?« Ed finally addressed this big pink elephant in the room. He didn't like to play dumb. Still, until now it had only been his suspicion. He had never had proof. It was on Jim to deliver that proof to him now.

»Did he tell you?« This was the confirmation he needed to almost crumple up the full plastic up in his hand.

»I have eyes, Jim.« Edward snarled instead. »And I actually use them. No, he did not tell me because I doubt that he remembers, after whatever Strange did to him.«

»There was some sort of helmet he used.« Jim mumbled and dragged a hand over his head. His eyes looked as if he was far away all of the sudden, almost as if he was remembering something that he had seen a while ago and shoved back into the darkest corners of his mind then. »Electroshocks.« He then continued. »Drugs. And some undisclosed serum that he called C.F.T. in his notes. Oswald was right when I met him there. This was torture. Even someone as strong-minded as Oswald would have to give in under this amount of pain sooner or later. There were mentions of his injuries in the notes. Strange meticulously wrote down every little injury Oswald received over the course of the months that he spent there. He took photos. His notes never outright stated that Oswald was raped, but the implications were clear.«

A part of him, the other him, wanted to strangle Jim. He couldn't deny that he hated the cop with every fiber of his being and not only because Jim was the man Oswald desired but because Jim was the man Oswald trusted the most and who had still left him there to suffer. _You didn't visit him yourself, did you, Ed? So, don't just blame Jim for not caring about Oswald, for not helping Oswald when he needed help the most._

»Listen, Ed, I know it's hard to see a person you love in that bad a condition but we ought to pull through that now. All of us, as a team.«

A team. He wondered who Jim was referring to now. Him and Ed? Him, Ed, Oswald, and Lee? Or was he adding Harvey to the mix and even Barnes? Was Oswald even a part of it in Jim’s mind? Suddenly, he felt like a part of the infamous musketeer. Jim, Lee, Harvey and him for one Oswald Cobblepot and at the same time, he knew that Jim had never even considered something like that for the old Oswald. The old Oswald could have been on the brink of death and begging Jim to help him and still Jim would have turned away. He Jim found Oswald in the woods back then, he would have delivered him to prison straight away.

Still, somehow he liked being part of this team. What he did not like was that Jim knew how he felt for Oswald. Or did he? At least this way, Jim would not try anything funny with _his_ Oswald. He was, despite everything Ed might think of him, a man of honor and principle and would not try to cheat him out of his luck, not so shortly after Kristen had _dumped_ him. At least not if he also thought that Oswald too felt this strongly for him.

Maybe he was just paranoid about Jim and Oswald. Jim had Lee, after all, and they were having a baby. However, now was certainly not the time to think about stuff like this either. Not when Oswald was on the other side of that glass window fighting for his life. Nevermind that Jim wasn't the right person to confide in either. Yet, Ed was adamant to play his cards just right now as he huffed out a strangled breath, and pressed his fingers of his free hand to the bridge of his nose in an attempt to regain control over his emotions. If he would play it right now, maybe that would even get Jim off his trail about Kirsten. »I just wished we had talked about it before this happened. I just wished I could have told him how I felt instead of being a coward about it. But … You know, after Kirsten just dumped me and left town to be with this complete asshole … I just lost all confidence, I think.«

Jim’s response came as expected. »I am sure he knows how you feel, Ed. You are a good man, don't punish yourself like that.« Jim sighed deeply sympathetically and patted his right shoulder like a friend would do. »Oswald was always good in reading people. He knows that you love him just as he loves you. You’ll see, you guys will pull through this just fine.«

»You think he loved me?« He tried his very best to sound just as hopeful as anyone would expect from a lovesick teenager and not a grown man and to look as pitiful as anyone could.

»Of course, I do.« Jim huffed with a slight roll of his rich blue eyes. »You just have to take a look at how he stares at you. As if he thought you hung the moon and the stars in the sky. It's cute, at least Lee says so, and even stronger since he came back from Arkham. Like a puppy, unfiltered and uncaring. So yes, I do think he loves you, Ed. And he probably has for a while now.«

Hearing those words out of the mouth of one Detective James Gordon certainly wasn't the same as hearing them from the object of his affection himself, but it was at the very least gratifying. Still, only because Jim said that Oswald loved him that certainly must not mean it was true. _He is a good detective, though_ , the tiny voice in the back of his head reminded him.

Well, it was true that Jim wasn't completely useless as a cop but he wanted to argue that this did not have to mean that he was right about Oswald now. After all, Oswald had changed a lot through Arkham and Ed, for his part, could only hope they would get the old Oswald back at some point. Then again, what would the old Oswald think of him? What would he do would he realize that Ed has suspected the abuse that had happened to him and still decided to sleep with him?

»I want to warn you, Jim. If Oswald ever changes back to his old self … He might be worse than ever before and I do not know how he will look at you then. After all, it was you who left him in Arkham. He wanted to be your friend before and he is your friend now but I would not bet my fortune on the possibility that he very much likes you afterward. He is known to hold grudges.«

And that was putting it mildly as they all knew. Maybe it wasn't the right thing of Ed to do to play on Jim’s bad consciousness for leaving Oswald behind in Arkham after everything they knew now, everything Jim seemed to know now. He could tell that the cop was blaming himself in part for what happened to Oswald - rightfully so, as he might add. Then again, Edward had never claimed to be a good guy, had he?

※※※※※※※

When Oswald woke up, it was to the unbearable sound of a beeping heart monitor to his side, telling him that he was indeed still alive in spite of the fact that he didn't feel very much alive. It didn't help either that he was confronted with none other than a very much concerned looking James Gordon who was sitting beside him on one of the typically uncomfortable plastic chairs that stood ready for visitors. The second he decided to open his eyes against all his better judgment he regretted the decision and squeezed them shut once more.

»How are you feeling?« He could almost hear the concern drip-drip-dripping from Jim’s voice and wanted to curse the other man. _A little too late_ , the dark voice in the back of his mind reminded him sourly. _Where was this concern when you begged him for help in Arkham?_

»Like I've been hit by a bulldozer - twice.«

He spared them both the comment that Jim’s presence did not make this any better mainly because he would have wished for a scenario like this in the past before Arkham. Back then, he would have rejoiced in the fact that Jim was actually worried about him. Now, there was just an empty feeling settling in the pit of his stomach. Plus, it wouldn't have been very polite and rather something the old Oswald would have said. »What happened? Where is Ed?«

»He was needed at the precinct. We didn't want you to be alone when you wake up, though. I’m off duty anyway for today.« And surely he had much more important things to do than to sit at his bedside and wait for him to wake up, such as building a nest for his unborn child, right? He couldn't quite deny that the thought that Jim was ignoring his responsibilities to be here and watch over him like that, made his heart flutter a little. The moment was gone as quickly as it came, though, as the dark voice in the back of his mind reminded him of what Ed had told him last night. He didn't believe Jim when he claimed that it was just concern for a former mobster that brought him here. Was this the Penguin, the old him, coming through again and questioning everyone else's motives, sensing danger and betrayal behind every corner?

»Ed called Lee last night when you were going through some form of seizure. We called the ambulance right away and you were brought here, to the Gotham Central General. Your condition was quite bad. You weren’t able to breathe on your own and was sent to intensive care right away. It wasn’t clear if you suffered any form of brain damage for at least a few hours. You were discharged from intensive care only two hours ago after you became stable enough again and started breathing on your own too.«

»But that's not the only reason why you are here. Don't take me for a fool only because I am not the same person as before Arkham. I am sane now, James, not dull.« The words came out just a little sharper than he meant them to sound.

Still, Jim smiled at that. »I would never make the mistake of underestimating the one and only Oswald Cobblepot. Not after everything we’ve been through.« He smirked. »You are right. In fact, I am here to talk to you about Hugo Strange.«

Had he expected another attack, another seizure or whatever had happened to him last night, Oswald had to disappoint him. Whatever had happened last night had been frightening for sure but it was over now. He had barely been conscious enough to grasp the situation then and he still had a hard time wrapping his mind around it. The name Hugo Strange only evoked mild nausea in the pit of his stomach and a growl from the Penguin buried deep inside while he, Oswald, was programmed to react with a gleeful smile at the name. »Professor Strange is a good man.« The response came automatically and there was hardly anything he could do about that. His programming didn't allow for it and deep down he hated that fact more than anything else in his life up until this point. Deep down, he still blamed Jim for abandoning him at Arkham after he had pleaded with the good detective to help him.

He had been sent to Arkham for a crime that they had both committed together, after all. For a crime that had created a link between them which none of them could deny - not even Jim. The moment Jim had pulled the trigger on Galavan, a mercy kill more than anything, Jim had sold his soul to the Penguin and they both knew it. Maybe that was why Jim had not helped him back then. Maybe he had hoped to be free of Oswald when he would let him rot in Arkham. Maybe he had thought this way he could forget about him and ignore his very existence.

»Ed told you about the investigation, hasn’t he?« He sounded almost uncertain how to approach the subject now.

»Yes.«

»I can assure you that we will treat your file and the evidence we got with the utmost care and caution. No one who is not directly involved in this case will see any piece of it.« It was an empty promise and they both knew it. He could feel the ants underneath his skin. There was something buried deep in the darkest corners of his mind that he did not wish anyone to know but he couldn’t quite place his finger on it now. Hands on his skin. Blood on his legs. As soon as this would become a court case, his name would be dragged through the mud without much care and soon everyone would know the most intricate details of his life.

»But the evidence we got … We may not be able to use it against Strange in court. We need your help, Oswald. We need you to make a statement. We've got the search warrant for Arkham but we both know that Strange is far from being an idiot. He will have noticed that your files are missing and he will have arranged for the documentation of his treatment to be hidden. If we would get our hands on that helmet we would maybe have some semblance of a chance but this case stands and falls with your testimony, Oswald.«

His testimony. Yes, Edward had warned him about that already and yet it did not feel any more real now as Jim brought it up. Though he could not deny the slight shiver running down his spine, the sensation as if his stomach was turning inside out. There was so much he wanted to say, there was so much the dark voice in the back of his mind screamed at him to say but instead, he only clenched his jaw and squeezed his lips into a tight line. He couldn't do it. He couldn't say the words, couldn't agree, couldn't pour out his heart, couldn't talk about his nightmares, couldn't even begin to put into words what had been done to him.

He didn't wish to remember and when he would talk about it, he would need to remember. He could still feel the agony he had been in, not only from the horrifying contraption Jim had described. He still felt the shame wash over him. He was still there when he closed his eyes. He was still in the bathtub with that nurse watching over him. He was still in his tiny, moldy, cold cell shivering in the corner. He was still being dragged through these endless hallways by uncaring shadow figures.

»Please, think about it, Oz.« Jim broke the silence and ripped him almost startlingly out of his thoughts. He forced a nod as Jim squeezed his shoulder and rose to his feet. He couldn't even force out a polite answer at this point.

Oswald was never alone for long in his hospital bed and sometimes he wasn't sure if he should be glad about it or bothered. The most at ease he felt whenever he would wake up to find Edward sitting by his side reading a book or making a grimace at whatever the newspaper in his hands claimed as news. Whenever he was alone, he felt lost in his own thoughts, unable to sort out what he was feeling or what he wanted to do.

There was still the matter of the investigation hanging in the air whenever either Ed, Lee or Jim would come to visit him. None of them ever really spoke to him about it though. He knew that the GCPD had started to search the asylum. However, it was just as Jim had told him before, they would not find anything of use for the case and they could not use his files to make the case either. It was hopeless.

 _Strange is a good man. He did nothing wrong, after all. Of course, they don't find any dirt on him._ That was what he was thinking over and over and over again but he could not fully drown out the screeching sound in the back of his mind that just never seemed to stop like a tinnitus slowly driving him insane. If he would listen closely, he would almost be able to make out words. He didn't wish to, though.

It was the day he was to leave the hospital to go back _home_ , to Ed’s flat, when life decided to surprise him once more. He had had a few days to think about his life now and still, he had no clue what he wanted to do with this new chance. He could not forever stay at Ed’s place, after all. A part of him was almost disgusted by the lack of progress he had made. The old Oswald wouldn't have wasted so much time. The old Oswald wouldn't have been such a pathetic excuse of a man, relying on another human being for everything almost. He needed to get back to his feet. He needed to become his own man again.

He was about to pack up his stuff, the few books and clothes Edward had brought him the first day, as there was a knock on the open door to his room. First, he believed it to be Ed who had left work a bit earlier to come and pick him up, but as he turned around to look over his shoulder, he was met with a familiar face. Grace Van Dahl, his stepmother, looked her best as always and a little out of place in this setting. Her entire elegant appearance was a stark contrast to the white world of the hospital around him and had Oswald blink in surprise at first. For just a moment he was certain that his mind was playing tricks on him again, as it seemed to have become its habit ever since this incident. He couldn’t deny that he still did not feel his best. He was tormented by cruel headaches daily and sometimes it was hard to stay focused on the here and now while his mind just wanted to pull him back down into the dark abyss of his nightmares over and over again.

»Oswald.« Her voice sounded soft as she spoke and the smile on her lips was pleasant as she stepped closer. No flowers or a get-well card. Instead, she held a box of chocolate in her hands. »Oh, my boy, I just heard about it. I would have come sooner, Darling.« There was this ringing in his ears again, reminding him to stay on his toes, to stay apprehensive. The joy he felt, however, was stronger. His family had not forgotten about him. »I'm terribly sorry, Oswald.«

»It's fine.« He promised brushing her worries away with a smile and a wave of his hand as he turned his full attention on her. Thanks to her high heels he had to look up to meet her eyes.

»How are you, Darling? Are you already well enough to leave again?« As if she only remembered the item she had brought, she extended her delicate hands with the box to him and waited that he would grab the gift. A tasteful red ribbon was tied around it. »That's for you. I remember that you liked those just as much as your father did before his heart wouldn’t allow him to have them anymore. But don't eat them all at once, remember there is quite a bit of alcohol in them.« Her words were accompanied by a small wink as Oswald’s smile even brightened at this.

»Thank you, Grace.« He replied quietly, almost a bit overwhelmed by the sheer fact that his stepmother had come to see him and that she actually cared for him. Maybe things would get better again. Maybe they could leave the past behind them for once. »Yes, I am better … The doctors would like me to stay a few more days but I’m well enough to leave. A hospital stay is not cheap, you see? And I do  not wish to be an unnecessary burden to my friends for much longer.«

It was obvious that she tried to keep a grimace from forming but her mouth looked as if she had bitten into a lemon at the sheer mention of money. Oswald’s smile never faltered though. »Anyway, enough about me!« He quickly addressed her again with another wide smile. »How are you? How are Charles and Sasha? Please extend only my best wishes to them both. I truly hope Charles makes progress with his novel, I can't wait to read it soon!«

»His what?« She mumbled. »Oh, his novel! Right. Yes, he does make progress, I hardly see the boy anymore because of it. I actually came here not only to see how you are doing, though, Oswald.«

»Oh?«

»I wanted to invite you for dinner. Saturday, perhaps?« Dinner at the mansion? Oswald was almost certain that he had either misheard it or that Grace and her invitation were both just another figment of his tortured mind. He only wished that Ed would be here now to tell him if he was hallucinating. He needed Ed.

»I would love that.« He smiled, though. »Would it be alright if I would bring a friend?«

 

**-End of Chapter 11-**

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He's back

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

They had nothing. No matter how many times they turned Arkham upside down, they came out empty handed with Oswald’s files working as their only hint that something very wrong had been happening there behind these old walls and doors. As Jim slumped further into his chair he let out a frustrated groan. He felt like he had been up and running for a week without sleep or food at this point.

»Please tell me that you have something for me, Ed. Anything.« Jim sighed as he turned to his friend who had walked up to his desk in his lab coat just a minute ago. He looked just as tired as Jim felt, although Harvey would certainly suspect that this was for different reasons. Young love, Harvey used to mutter whenever Ed dared to yawn in his presence.

»They cleaned up the place very thoroughly.« Ed replied and as Jim looked up at him from his spot at his desk, he seemed just as defeated as Jim felt. »There is nothing. No evidence, no traces of mistreatment, no signs of torture. And Oswald is still unwilling to talk about it. He is thoroughly convinced that Strange never harmed him in any way.« Ed dragged a hand through his hair and while Harvey would have sat down on the edge of Jim's desk, Ed just kept standing there worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. »I don't know how to convince him to speak with Barnes, Jim. I tried everything. I even begged him to tell his story to Barnes - as far as he remembers it.«

»If he doesn't want to talk, we can't force him, Ed.« And even saying these words hurt. Oswald deserved justice for what had happened to him behind Arkham’s closed doors. And hell, he was probably not the only one who had suffered like this under Strange’s hands.

Oswald Cobblepot might have been a criminal before Arkham, a murderer even, maybe a sociopath, but since Jim had found him in Arkham all beaten up and afraid, he had grown into a friend for Jim and one he wanted to protect. Yet, it was true what Ed told him before. There was no way of telling how Oswald would react to him would he ever come back to his old self. They were friends now and Oswald trusted him even with the knowledge that Jim had gathered about his time in Arkham and which Oswald kept suppressing but what would they become if he would ever get back to his old self?

What would become of them would Oswald turn back into the Penguin and see Jim for who he was again? He hadn't been a friend to him before, not even an accomplice. The moment Oswald had told him that he was being tortured at Arkham, the moment he had begged him for help, he should have acted. This was the truth and they both knew this truth.

»Barnes is growing restless. If we don't find anything incriminating on Strange soon he will drop the case. I hate to say it but we need the Penguin.« Jim found himself sighing as he looked at Edward again. »The Penguin would have no problem to tell his story.«

»Much rather he would want to kill Strange.« Ed snorted. »And I wouldn't stop him.«

As Jim leaned back and found himself staring at the files that were spread out on the desk in front of him he had to admit that, no, he wouldn't stop him either. Instead, he would help cover up the crime. As long as Hugo Strange would get his just punishment he would turn a blind eye and that thought alone was terrifying to Jim. This was not him. He hardly recognized himself anymore. He had never been one for vigilante justice or for taking revenge. Yet, he had shot Theo Galavan last year. He had killed him and Oswald had ended up in Arkham for it. He owed him his revenge.

Still, if Oswald would get his revenge at one point … What would that make Jim? Would he still be able to look at himself in the mirror? Would he be able to look at his child and raise them to become good people? A part of him knew that he couldn't allow this to happen but a much darker voice in the back of his mind knew that this was inevitable.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Van Dahl Mansion**

He surely would not have imagined to find himself in the Van Dahl Mansion after he only had heard stories of the house until now. It was just as impressive as Oswald had made it out to be for sure with countless portraits of dead members of the century-old family staring down on Ed as he was walking through these seemingly ancient halls. The house itself was a grim reminder of the birth of this city as if time had stopped in here. Everything was just as it used to be when the mansion had been built centuries ago. His footsteps echoed from the marble floor of the entry hall. For a second, he had wondered if they would actually be allowed inside the house despite the fact that Grace had invited them over for dinner. The fact that she had surprisingly appeared at the hospital was still enough to arouse his suspicion. Oswald, on the other hand, seemed still unconcerned by it all. If anything he was happy to be here again.

It was probably a ploy. Edward, unlike Oswald in his current state, was not nearly naive enough to believe that this could be anything but a way to gain Oswald’s trust back. Or … worse. Surely, Grace was nervous about Oswald’s very existence and wondered whether or not the young man would look into his father's death more closely at one point. And even if Oswald would do no such thing, he, as Elijah Van Dahl’s only blood relative, had much better claims to his fortune and estates than Grace ever had in the first place. If Edward would be in Grace’s position, he would be nervous about Oswald too.

It would only need a bit of courage from Oswald’s side so that Grace would lose everything she had gained so cleverly. Elijah’s death might have been an accident as he had drunk from Oswald’s wine but ed was more than aware that he would have found his untimely death certainly that very same year. In fact, Ed believed that Oswald’s death in front of his father would have aided her in this regard. How easy would it have been to claim that Elijah had died from the shock of seeing his only son, whom he just had found after thirty-one years, dying in his arms.

Of course, would she have been dealing with the real Oswald Cobblepot, she wouldn't have had such an easy time getting away with the murder of Oswald's father. Suddenly, Edward couldn't help but to think about what Jim had claimed earlier. They needed the Penguin to have success in this case against Strange. Even Jim Gordon did admit that they needed Penguin and maybe tonight would be the night they would get just that. Maybe he would be able to drive Grace to tell the truth for once but first, there were a few preparations to be made.

The introduction to Grace, Charles and Sasha Van Dahl was stilted after the butler, James, had opened the door for him and Oswald and led both men into the sitting room that seemed to serve as a sort of anteroom to the dining room, separated only by a large archway. The sitting room was heavy with dark tapestry, massive red curtains in front of the french windows, a fire crackling in a marble fireplace and was littered with even more paintings of family members or the classics one would find in every respectable household.

Needless to say, except for the family portraits, none of the paintings were originals but at least they were decent copies of the works of long dead masters. Good enough to fool anyone who had not such a keen eye as Ed. He could only assume that one family member once fell into troubled times and sold the original art to replace them slowly and one after the other with fakes. Well, stuff like this happened even in the best of families. Of course, none of the current Van Dahls would admit to that. Hell, he would not even be surprised if it had been Grace Van Dahl herself who had replaced the paintings to hide some money from her husband - just in case.

»It is so nice to have you here again, Oswald.« Grace smiled as she rose her glass of champagne at her guests and was joined by her children, Oswald and Edward with enthusiasm - which was honest at least on Oswald’s part.

»I am glad to be here too.« Oswald smiled gleefully and his eyes were twinkling with joy in the dim light of the sitting room and under the watchful eyes of his father’s portrait above the fireplace. »Though I admit that I was nervous to come back. After what happened with father the last time I was here.«

»I'm sorry if we made you feel unwelcome, Oswald.« Grace offered with another of her fake smiles. Oswald still seemed blind to them. »I wished I could take back what I said and did back then, Dear. I was just-«

»You were grieving.« Oswald interrupted her gently with a small wave of his hand before he sipped on his champagne again. At least Edward had the comfort that he had seen how all their glasses had been filled in front of them from the same bottle. Otherwise he would have not even sipped his champagne. »I get it, Grace. Really, it's okay. We were all grieving and everyone deals with loss differently. I don't hold it against you. After all, I was a notorious criminal before I was healed by Professor Strange in Arkham. You had every right to be concerned about me and my presence at your house. I can assure you that my mother, would she have been in your shoes, would have done the same thing to protect me as you protected Charles and Sasha.«

Ed forced a smile but inside he was screaming. Grace seemed just as surprised as her offspring by Oswald’s words but all their smiles were strained and almost a bit flabbergasted thanks to Oswald’s explanation. He could almost tell by the look on their faces how glad they were that Oswald, in this form, was a bit slow.

»I am glad to hear that.« Grace smiled before she turned her attention to Ed now. He felt as if he was staring straight at a humongous spider. A black widow, literally. »So, Mr. Nygma. I am happy to welcome you in my house. Every friend of Oswald's is always welcome.«

»I couldn't stay back when Oswald asked me to join him.« Ed forced a polite smile. »Not after he told me so much about the house of his ancestors.« _His_ house, not Grace’s house. He hoped that he had made the implication very clear with his statement and judging by the way she pursed her lips, he did. »He is very proud to be a part of this house and the Van Dahl legacy.«

»So, in what kind of relationship are you to my stepson?« There too the implication was clear.

»He lives with me.« Edward stated truthfully but noticed the glance Oswald shot him. Was he afraid that Ed would tell Grace about the true nature of their relationship? He would certainly not go on and hell Oswald’s stepmother that he was fucking Oswald’s brains out every other night. It wouldn’t be polite. »We know each other for a long time now. Since Oswald had no place where he could go after his father’s death, I gladly took him in until he gets back to his feet. That's what friends are for, after all, right?«

»Well, I am glad to see that Oswald has such a good friend, Mr. Nygma.« She smiled before turning her attention to Oswald again. »Your father would be very proud of you, Oswald, to hear that you are working for the GCPD, even if it's just as an errand boy.« The small snicker that escaped her children at these words could not be denied.

»I think his father would have had many reasons to be proud of Oswald.« Ed smiled pleasantly and put a hand on Oswald’s shoulder. »Sadly we will never know this, right? It's such a shame that he died so suddenly and unexpectedly so shortly after he met his long-lost son. If I wouldn't know any better, this story could just as well have been straight out of a tragic soap opera.«

»Fate sometimes is very cruel.« Charles claimed from behind his mother's shoulder. He was a vile and absolutely distastefully stupid young man. He was certainly involved in all of this but too stupid to realize that Ed was already smelling blood in the water. Unlike Grace. Hell, even his sister seemed to be quicker to catch what he was hinting at. She had her mother’s wits and he remembered what Oswald had told him about her once and how she had once tried to seduce him, not realizing that Oswald was gay. Surely, the plan had been to seduce him into sex only so that she could later either claim he had raped her or to disrupt the family and force Elijah’s hand into disowning him.   

»That I would agree upon.« Ed smiled and raised his glass in a silent toast. »Though, in this case, Fate truly was an unforgiving bitch, wasn't she? Oswald told me how his father planned on reworking his last will in Oswald’s favor just the next day and then he died.«

Grace could only save her face thanks to the butler who was announcing that the dinner was ready and waiting. She quickly ushered them into the dining room with one of her fake smiles. However, Edward was just as quick to excuse himself shortly to use the bathroom. When he returned to the family they were all just about to sit down while the old Butler was filling the glasses around the table out of a decanter with red wine. It was then, as Edward took his place on Oswald’s left-hand side, as he could see the act unfold. Butler James had just filled Oswald and Edward’s glasses and was about to round the table, as his foot caught on the edge of the carpet underneath the table, causing him to lose his balance and drop the decanter. Red wine was spilled all over the carpet as the decanter broke into thousand little pieces of glass and everyone around the table jolted in surprise, all but Edward. He had seen what was happening in front of his eyes, Oswald, on the other hand, was blind for it.

»I am so terribly sorry, Madam!« The butler huffed his embarrassment. »I will fetch a new decanter right away.«

»Oh, no, my dear James.« Grace answered calmly with a reassuring smile that was so completely unlike her that even Edward could catch the falseness of it easily. »Don't worry about it, I fetch the wine myself.« She was out of the room before anyone could keep her from doing so. Not three minutes later did she return with a fully filled decanter of red wine. »There we go, problem solved.« She smiled as she placed the decanter on the table and sat down.  

Edward kept smiling pleasantly at Oswald's side as James filled the glasses of the other three people at the table and then retreated back into the kitchen so that they could eat in peace. The wine stains on the expensive carpets and the glass shards would be there later still. It didn't take long before Oswald’s fingers first extended to his glass and it was then that Ed, clumsily, hit Oswald’s arm with his elbow to spill the wine all over the precious tablecloth.

»Ed!«

»Oh, dear, I’m sorry, Oswald.« Ed immediately professed as he unsuccessfully wiped at the tablecloth with his napkin. »I’m just so terribly clumsy today. You wouldn't believe how many times I dropped stuff around the lab today!«

»Well, I start to.« Grace snorted and scratched her neck gingerly with the face of a woman that was looking down on a cockroach as her eyes fell upon Oswald and Ed. Just as Ed refilled Oswald's glass with a polite smile, he noticed how Charles and Sasha drank from their own glasses. They did not seem very invested in this evening and most of the time they were but silent witnesses to this whole charade as it seemed. Not that they wouldn’t like to participate in all of it.

»Though I must ask you, Grace« Ed then turned his attention back to her as Charles gave a small cough, followed shortly by his sister. »The wine … Is it the same poison you used on your husband or did you invest into something new?«

»Ed!« Oswald frowned. »You forget yourself!« He seemed truly scandalized by Ed’s insinuation. Ed, on the other hand, was done playing games now.

»I beg your pardon young man?« Grace all but erupted as her children's coughing fit did not seem to subside. In fact, Sasha started to gasp for breath while her mother seemed deaf to it in her arrogance at the moment. The sound was like music to his ears.

»I'm just asking because at least it would mean a quick death for them then - though not a pleasant one. Rat poison, I’m assuming? I mean, why throw away perfectly good poison if you could use it again to get rid of the person it had originally been intended for anyway.«

»What?« Grace rose from her chair in the blink of an eye. »Oswald, I believe you and your friend need to go!« The moment foam came out of her children's mouths, Grace let out a shrill shriek. Sasha was all but clawing at her own throat as she tried to get up from her chair. All it did was to cause her cum chair to fall to the ground where she ended up in spastic fits thanks to the poison.

»Of course, I exchanged the wine earlier when I said that I was going to use the bathroom. You shouldn’t have put a not on which wine was for us.« Ed smirked gleefully as Oswald stared at him in horror, his eyes darting between Ed, Grace and his dying stepsiblings. »I knew that you would not just invite us without good reason.« There was panic as the butler came back running and Grace tried to help her children without much success as she all but threw herself on her daughter on the ground. Ed could only imagine that the way Grace was holding Sasha in her arms now, was the same way Oswald had held his own father. The thought provided him with a sick sense of satisfaction without  a doubt. »I knew that you would at least try to kill Oswald tonight to ensure that he would never even get the chance to claim his fortune, so I decided to take matters into my own hands, you see.«

»You are a psychopath!« Grace shrieked but she was helpless to save her children as they suffered the same death as Oswald’s father. Grace was not the only one in panic and uproar. The butler already started running to get to the phone and Oswald was beyond terrified as he stared at Ed now.

»Ed, what did you do?« His voice was barely above a whisper.

»I show you what this woman did to your father, Oswald!« Ed turned to Oswald now and he saw realization dawn on his pale face. There was pure terror in his clear blue eyes, but there was something else too, something a lot darker and Ed could almost feel it seep out of him. »Tell him the truth for once, Grace! Come on, tell him!«  

»Yes!« She finally growled and sent spit flying everywhere as Charles’s face fell into his plate. »Yes, I killed that old fool! But the poison was not meant for him, it was meant for that freak he called a son!«

And this was it. He could see the change happening right in front of his eyes and it was the most beautiful thing he had ever witnessed. It was like seeing a caterpillar become a butterfly in the matter of seconds. He wanted to say that Oswald’s eyes had turned dark at her words, that they became the black orbs of some devil, but they stayed the same beautifully blue they always were with just the hint of turquoise in them, remembering Edward of the icicles that would sometimes form during the coldest winters underneath the roof of the GCPD. And though the color stayed exactly the same, they became cold all at once and the features of his face, soft a minute ago, hardened within the blink of an eye.

»A freak?« Oswald groaned while Grace was sobbing over her children almost a little too hysterically for Ed’s taste. He did not believe her for a second. »A freak?« His voice became even lower than before as he slowly rose from his chair. »A _freak_?« Grace did not even seem to notice how Oswald grabbed the carving knife from the plate with the roast.

He didn't hold him back as Oswald finally snapped. In fact, Ed just stepped back a little and just watched. An oh, wasn’t it a glorious sight to behold?

※※※※※※※

He could taste Grace’s blood on his lips as he licked them clean from the wine he had gulped from the crystal glass in his left hand. »That was an unexpected turn of events I must say.« Oswald heard himself humming and the only response he got was a low chuckle and the sound of something heavy being dragged across the floorboards.

The house was eerily silent now except maybe for the blood drip-drip-dripping from the table. Someone had to clean up that mess and that someone would certainly not be him. He was done cleaning other people's mess. He was done keeping his head down. »I’ll call Gabe … He can take care of all of this.« Oswald then sighed as he glanced over at Ed who just dragged the lifeless body of the old butler back into the dining room. He had left a trail of blood all over the floorboards.

»You know she wanted to blame your death on your bad health, right?« Ed sighed as he straightened his back with a groan. »That was why she came to visit you at the hospital. She smelled an opportunity. This way she would have been seen as a caring stepmother who tried to get back in contact with her stepson after he fell into bad health just like his father did.«

»And tragically, fate would have come between us and our family as I died due to my bad health - thanks to that bastard Strange and his experiments.« Oswald snorted.

He felt nothing as he took in the scene before him. Charles’ face lay on his plate, mashed potato in his dark hair. Sasha lay on the ground, her body frozen in the twisted agony she had died in. And Grace … Well, she had seen better days as she was lying next to her daughter. »What do you think about putting her head on display?«

»Well, it would certainly make a bold statement.« Ed sighed as he looked down on the matriarch of the family.  It was true that he might have overdone it a bit there. Her head was barely on her shoulders. »However, it's probably very unwise to do so. After all, you don't want the GCPD to think that you are a killer, right? Your good friend Jim would not like that.«

»You would, though.« Oswald grinned as he leaned back further in his chair at the head of the table, the same chair Grace had occupied before.

»What do you mean?«

»Well, it's true that Jim wouldn't like to see that I’m myself again. He grew quite fond of the ‘sane’ me. You, on the other hand, would like him to see him realize how wrong he was, right?«

»I'm sure I don't know what you mean.«

»Oh, Ed, always such a tease.« He grinned even brighter now. There was still a bit of blood staining his teeth. »I can smell your jealousy from across the room!«

»Can you now?« Ed smirked as he stepped closer and leaned heavily on the table until they were almost at eye level. It was true that Oswald did not enjoy looking up to taller people. He didn't mind much though when it came to Ed. In fact, he had always had a thing for tall men - which was good since almost everyone was taller than him. He didn't seem to mind the mess that was staining his suit jacket now. Maybe this made him only more attractive for Oswald. They needed fresh clothes. »It would be beyond twisted to fuck you right here on the table, would it?«

»Certainly.« Oswald smirked but pulled him in for a kiss anyway. They only broke apart as he bit down hard on Ed’s lower lip. »And it would be poor manners too. Impious one might say and utterly distasteful.«

»You do not sound  abhorred by the idea.« Ed grinned. Oh, how much he loved that toothy smug grin. He liked confident men and Ed had come a long way since he had first met him.

»Because I am not.« Oswald hummed against Ed’s lips before he rose from his chair and emptied his glass. »But, I’m afraid, we have bodies to hide and a story to fabricate. After all, I am now the sole heir of the Van Dahl estate, am I not?«

»Any ideas yet?«

»Well, we were invited to join the Van Dahls for dinner, you see.« Oswald later told the officer who arrived at the crime scene in distress. »We were running a little late though and when we arrived the door stood wide open and we found the butler dead in the hall. Poor old James. I got to know him when I was guest at the house for a short while.«

»Why didn't you call us right away?« The officer demanded to know but there was sympathy in his eyes as he did. He was one of the regulars Oswald had made errands for these past couple of weeks. Who would have known that this might come in handy at one point?

»Well, of course, we were worried for my family!« Oswald immediately replied. »Ed told me to stay behind as to not mess with the evidence, but I had to see if they were alright, you have to understand, Officer! They are, after all, all that I have left!«

»And? Did you find them?« Officer Pierce asked scribbling idly on his notepad.

»No … No we didn't.« Oswald mumbled and dragged a hand over his face for dramatic effect. »I just … I just found my step brother's hand lying there on a silver platter on the dining table, Officer. Please, you have to find them! I implore you to find them before it might be too late!«

»You seem very convinced that they are in mortal danger.«

»Of course! Have you not listened to what I said?« He tried not to sound too enraged because the sweet, sane Oswald would have never lost his temper like this. He would have cried and that was why he forced tears out of his eyes with not much effort. »And I am afraid that I might be the reason for it. I made many enemies in the past. Surely, my affiliation to the Van Dahls was the reason for this attack. Who would otherwise find reason to attack them in this way?«

»Who indeed?« Oswald was surprised to find Jim Gordon and Harvey Bullock arrive at the scene but he never dropped the act as he hurried over to Jim, his leg dragging badly behind him as he did.

»Jim!« He exclaimed and almost threw himself at the detective as he clutched the lapels of his coat and nearly pressed his tear-stained face into his chest. »Jim, my friend! Thank God you are here, it's horrible!«

»Where's Ed?« Harvey asked looking around the scene. Blue and red light was illuminating the area as not even a handful of cops were roaming the house and the front lawn.

»With the forensics.« Oswald stuttered. »Who would do such a thing, Jim?« He then urged his friend with new tears in his eyes. »They are innocent people, they are my family, why would anyone attack them?«

»I don't know, Oz.« Jim sighed and patted his shoulder sympathetically with a soft smile playing on his face. »We will find out.«

»Do you think-« He stopped himself right away. »No that's stupid.«

»What's stupid? Come on, tell me. Everything could be a lead, Oz!«

»I just wondered … Do you think that … that it might have been Hugo who orchestrated this? I mean, he can't be happy about the investigation against him! What if he fears I might change my mind and speak up against him? What if this was meant as a warning for me?«

Jim didn't seem convinced at first but as Oswald’s eyes darted from his to Harvey’s and back to Jim, the detective let out a small sigh. »It could be. You know what, after everything we learned about that man, I would not even be surprised.«

Oswald swallowed hard and looked back to the house with concern dripping from his face.

»You and Ed should better get to the precinct to give your testimony, okay? And then right back home. You look like you cold need some rest.«

Oswald nodded and bit down on his bottom lip before he slowly walked towards Ed’s car just as his boyfriend walked out of the house dragging long fingers through his hair and shaking his head in something akin to exasperation. »Jim?« He turned around once more as he reached the passenger’s seat door. Jim turned to face him right away. »If Strange has anything to do with that … tell Barnes I want to talk to him.«

 

**-End of Chapter 12-**


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Butch and I might be a bit bitter about what happened to him at the Season 4 finale Q___Q And I might be a bit bitter about the things he did during Season 2

**Gotham - Edward Nygma’s apartment**

There was a distinct difference between the man that had been living in his apartment for the last couple of weeks and the true version of that same man and that truth had never been clearer to Edward than when they would fuck.

The Oswald he had seen throughout the last few weeks had liked it slow and tender, lots of kisses and gently exploring fingers. His soft moans had barely filled the apartment as he had melted under Ed’s touch. He had been docile and completely submissive to everything he would do. When Ed had wanted him, he had gotten him, no matter the circumstance. He had never refused him and had allowed Ed to take what he wanted whenever he wanted.

This Oswald, however, was a hurricane and always fighting for dominance. While the other Oswald had been perfectly contempt to lie on his back and have Ed do everything, this Oswald did not much like to lie back and accept everything. He liked being on top and taking control while simultaneously giving control to Ed. He wouldn’t refuse Ed either, but for entirely different reasons. Wherein the other Oswald might have acted so submissive to him out of fear, as he slowly started to realize, this Oswald would have none of it. He took what he wanted and he enjoyed it. He couldn't deny that it was absolutely damn alluring to have Oswald on top of him, taking his cock in slow deliberate moves of his narrow hips while Ed could do nothing but dig his fingers into the flesh of his hips to regain some form of self-control at least.

Not that there would be any semblance of that left in him by now. He didn't wish to burden his thoughts with the things gnawing at his conscious. He didn't wish to think about why this other version of Oswald had acted the way he did towards sex. He didn't wish to wonder if he had used Oswald in a way that hadn't been right. And how could he think about stuff like that when he had the real thing, the real Oswald on top of him now anyway?

The moans that Oswald tore from his throat filled the apartment as he took him even deeper, clutching his shoulders and digging his nails into them for support. Only as his leg was starting to giving him troubles, did Ed take over again as he grabbed him hard by his hips and turned them around in one swift move.

A grunt that escaped Oswald’s lips was the only sign of his annoyance with the fact that Ed slid out of him at this change of position. Yet, he tensed just a little as Ed reclaimed his position between Oswald’s legs as they fell open for him just a bit more. Ed reached down to hold himself in place, before pushing against the unyielding tightness of Oswald's body which welcomed him all too eagerly again. A gruff moan was ripping through Ed's body when he finally was deeply sheathed inside the young mobster’s body again, a sensation that he just didn't want to miss anymore. Oswald surprised him again, when he clasped his legs around Ed's waist to get him closer, aimlessly searching for his mouth – if only to suppress and quiet his pleasured moans. Not that he would usually care for that. He was quite vocal during sex just as well as every other facet of his life.

Ed would not give into Oswald's demands of a kiss, instead, he only grinned wider, though he could hardly hold himself any longer, now that he was buried in the constricting warmth that was Oswald's body. »Imagine your good detective would see you like this.« He found himself teasing as the idea excited him to no end. Jim would be scandalized.

Oswald growled, but bucked his hips again, making Ed flinch in surprise. »Stop talking!«

He was probably far too dazed to see the wide grin on Ed's face at this point. »Well, if you insist.« He chuckled before he grabbed Oswald's thin wrists with one of his much larger hands to hold them over his head. He enjoyed having him at his mercy now more than ever. He enjoyed knowing that his hands would leave bruises and marks all over this beautiful pale body that all too easily accepted those marks. He wanted the whole world to know that Oswald was his now. He wanted to mark him in all the ways possible as his, so there would be no other men daring getting close to Oswald ever again. Especially not James Gordon.

Oswald’s body was taut as a bowstring, while Ed rocked his hips forwards and fucked into him without mercy. He wanted to make Oswald forget all the nights he spent in fear, wanted to erase everything anyone might have ever done to him in the past. A yelp of shock and pain was tearing from Oswald's throat, but it did nothing to stop the almost brutal pace ed was going for. His eyes were rolling back and falling close as Ed sent waves of thickened pleasure flooding through his body, making him forget the sharp snaps of pain.

»Do not hold back.« Ed growled biting down on Oswald's beautiful white throat as he bared it at him, when he arched his spine upwards. Beneath his lips he could feel his pulse going berserk before Ed's thrusts crushed even harder into his body as if he owned it. Oswald's deep and throaty moans were now even louder than the wet slaps Ed produced slamming down into him. It seemed Oswald, who always had such a way with words, had a hard time even forming coherent sentences any longer now.

»Harder…« He demanded panting, his ice blue eyes finally locking with Ed's, almost driving him into insanity with their burning glow. »Please fuck me harder!«

Oh, he loved how wanton he sounded – and he loved to know that he was the only one to hear him like this. »You have no clue how long I wanted to do this before all this crap happened.« He growled when he slammed into him harder and simultaneously grabbing Oswald's cock with his free hand again to stroke him in tune with his thrusts. »You have no clue how much I hated Jim for not doing anything as you were sent to Arkham. I wanted to make him pay so much, Oswald.«

»Did I fucking stutter? Stop fucking talking!« Oswald almost yelled at him, slamming his head back in frustration for not being able to do much. Of course, Oswald did surprise Ed before, but now it was Ed having the upper hand and Oswald would not stand a chance against him. »Stop talking and fuck me harder already!«

He almost laughed breathlessly, before he grabbed him harder, stroking the aggression out of his body. Oh, he fucking loved this. Never in his life had he experienced something like this. With Kristen it had been completely different and maybe because of his lack in experience. Now, however, Ed only wanted to fuck this boldness out of him as he could feel how Oswald was clenching underneath him, aimlessly thrusting into Ed's eager hand. He wanted to urge him to slow down, but Ed himself did not want to slow down at all. And then finally Oswald's whole body was spasming in the sudden jolt of relief, his toes curling behind Ed's back and his spine again arching upwards.

It was this sight and the clenching of Oswald's body around him that made Ed's climax all the more intense when it hit him like a train. The sensation was insane despite how often he had fucked Oswald already. Yet, he couldn't remember if it had ever been this intense before. His body had never felt so caught in a riptide, had never felt like he could barely move as he spent himself, riding his orgasm out while thrusting into Oswald and forcing his own body to keep moving.

Oswald was lying underneath him, when Ed finally pulled out of him, watching his own cum lazily dripping out of the former king of Gotham, who was lying there with his eyes closed, looking just like he had been fucked hard enough to not move his body past a few twitches. His neck, arms, and face were layered in red-purplish marks, looking wrecked and owned. As he fell onto the back beside Oswald, he quickly decided that he would not move an inch until the next morning would force him to leave his bed again.

»I should warn you, Ed.« Oswald huffed between breaths after a while as he rested next to him on his back, covered in sweat from head to toe and breathing raggedly. »When we go through with this, you will learn things about me that will make you look at me differently.«

Ed turned on his side so that he could better watch his lover and draw his fingers up and down his stomach, drawing a low little hum from Oswald’s lips. »Tell me then. I would much rather have you tell me your darkest secrets than to hear them from anyone else.« Maybe this was not the right approach to gain Oswald’s trust to tell him the things he already knew. Or at the very least suspected. The look Oswald shot him was unreadable.

»Where do I start?« Oswald huffed. He was beautiful the way he looked right now. All ruffled like a bird and utterly exhausted.

»At the beginning.« He rolled his eyes at Ed’s remark before he slowly sat up against the headboard of the metal bed frame. That couldn't be comfortable without a pillow to lean against.  

»At the beginning then.« He sighed after a moment of contemplation. »I am afraid that everything I ever told Strange will soon be public knowledge, Ed. And I fear that I might never regain my footing in this town as soon as the people of Gotham learn the truth about me.«

»What truth?« Ed gently coaxed as he sat up as well despite what he had sworn to himself just moments ago. Unlike Oswald, he did not lean against the headboard, though. Instead, he remained further down on the bed, sitting cross-legged in the middle of his bed and dragged Oswald’s bad ankle into his lap so that he could massage his fingers through the knotted muscle tissue.

»That I am no king of anything.« Oswald finally admitted with a small little sigh. »That I was just a little boy who was fucked by his neighbor when my mother was at work and didn't know what was happening. That I was just a teen who sold his body to have money to buy food. And even years later, when I claimed to have all that power over the city and the underworld, I couldn't protect my mother. And I couldn't protect myself inside Arkham either. My life seems to be an endless spiral of pain and abuse and I do not see a way out of it.« As Ed frowned at him, Oswald chuckled. »In a way, I think, sane-me did manage just fine. In a way, I was happy this way as I was not able to relive what I experienced in every waking second. Not just Arkham, everything else too.«

»Therefore you were tortured by nightmares so badly that it landed you in the hospital.« Ed replied calmly. He wanted to argue with him for these statements, but he could understand what he was saying. He could understand the reasoning behind his words. Sometimes ignorance really was bliss.

»You don't seem surprised.« Oswald then sighed and for a moment there, Ed tried to think what he should say to this. Should he lie or pay Oswald the same respect that he had gotten from him and tell him the entire truth?

»I suspected something like this.« He then decided to opt for the true answer. »You know … there are certain signs, traces, characteristics that people who suffered from abuse in their childhood carry around for the rest of their lives. The grades of abuse might be different, but the traces are similar in all of them. When I first met you, I felt drawn to you like a moth to a flame. Later, I understood that it was the darkness inside of you that had drawn me in from the start and even later I understood that this darkness was not just your character or your evil deeds but the abuse you suffered. You found a way to turn the stain it left on your soul into an armor, into a weapon and that's all too common for people like you - for people like us.«

Oswald was silent for a moment before he seemed to grasp what Ed had said and opened his mouth. »Ed…« There was more but apparently, Oswald didn't manage to turn his feelings into words any further than that.

»I was never sexually abused.« Ed clarified then with a small shake of his head before he focused on his fingers on Oswald’s ankle again. »When my dad lost his job at the old Arkham Asylum, we barely scraped by. He had been a drunk before then but the loss of his job turned him into a violent asshole. He always was a bully to me and my mother but still, no matter that he beat her, she always stuck by him. No matter what he would do to us, she always loved him more than me. His beatings became a regular occurrence for me each week after the closure of the old asylum. Living in that apartment was like living a nightmare every day.«

Looking back on it, he was very well aware that it was this time when he had first heard this voice in the back of his mind.

»Anyway, my father died when I was in high school. One night he got wasted and stumbled in front of a train. Needless to say, I did not shed a tear for that bastard. My mother, on the other hand, she decided it would be best to hang herself one day while I was at school.« He shrugged his shoulders as he decided that he wanted to sound unconcerned and unbothered while nothing could be even remotely farther from the truth. »I still remember how I found her. In her prime, she had been beautiful and that's how I will always remember her, you know? Beautiful long blonde hair and an emerald summer dress that swayed slightly with her body as she hang from the ceiling fan.«

He found himself gently swaying his left hand in the air, back and forth, imitating her swaying body as he remembered that god awful day. It had been the middle of August and Gotham had suffered under quite the atypical heatwave. She had hanged herself in the early morning hours, just after Ed had left for school and when he returned in the early evening, the stench had been unbearable. »Well, I never returned to that apartment, of course. With the insurance policies of my parents I found a nice little place to stay until I would leave for college and after college I bought this apartment right here. This way I thought, they could at least once do something nice for me.«

»Your mother« Oswald began quietly. »Did she never try to protect you from him?«

»My mother?« He snorted. »Hell no. It was my own fault for acting out, she said. She said I could not expect anything else for provoking him the way I always did.«

»Did you hate her?«

»Sometimes I did, yes. Sometimes I wished they would both just die and leave me be. Now I realize that she was just weak, you know? She was completely detached from reality, she was dependent on him and mistook those feelings for love. Worse of all, she was terribly afraid of him and she was a coward. She would have much rather seen how he would beat me up for no reason at all other than that I was breathing than to suffer from him herself. She was weak. She had been chewed up by society and spit back out. It took me years but finally I took pity on her.« He went back to massaging Oswald’s ankle and foot as if this could calm his mind. »But your mother did protect you.« Maybe a little too late, but at least Oswald had the comfort of knowing that his mother had truly loved him. That was more than Ed could ever have hoped for.

»She did.« He sighed quietly. »When she found out … Jesus … When she found out about what my babysitter did to me everytime she left me in his care … My mother was a frail woman as long as I can remember but then … She would have killed him had he not managed to flee. I swear, she would have beaten him to death with a frying pan.« He shook his head gently.

»She was never the same again after that. It was as if a part of her had died when she found me like that. And of course, when she called the police and tried to get this guy arrested, no one believed her. To the police she, with her broken English and her weird clothes, was just another immigrant and I was too scared to say anything. I didn't speak for months. Having her find out, was worse than everything else, even worse than the pain. Not because I was embarrassed. I knew that it wasn't my fault and that I didn't do anything wrong, mainly because she told me over and over again. The worst was to see how it broke her, you know? I never doubted my mother’s love and seeing how knowing that she hadn't been able to protect me ruined her … That was worse than the pain and the fear. I swear that she suffered worse from it than I did. At least, that was what I told myself later to make accepting it easier. For a while it worked. For a while I forgot. And then Strange came along and with him everything I have put to rest before.«

Ed squeezed his ankle a bit harder at those words as he looked back up at Oswald now. »Everything went according to plan until now. You’ll get your revenge, Oswald.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

They had found the bodies of the Van Dahls in the old abandoned greenhouse of the mansion. It hadn't been used for years, perhaps decades judging by the state the plants were in. Most of the pot plants had died long ago, the ivy, however had overgrown the entire place, almost developing a mind of its own. In all this mess the officers on the scene had found Grace Van Dahl and her children. Whoever had killed them had not even tried to hide their bodies. It was possible that they had been interrupted by the arrival of Edward and Oswald at the mansion, certainly, but to Jim the crime scene did not look like it had been left in a hurry.

»What can you tell me about the deceased, Lee?« Jim sighed later as he leaned against Lee’s desk inside the morgue. Grace Van Dahl rested on the slab in the middle of the room, most of her body covered neatly with a cloth out of respect as long as Lee wouldn't be alone working on her.

»Both her children were killed with poison. Ed is currently getting the testing done on what poison was used. Charles Van Dahl’s left hand was amputated after his death had already occurred and probably been placed on the scene deliberately. Forensics say that all three of them had been killed inside the dining room after they sat down to eat. The butler, James Tremaine, was killed as his throat was slit from ear to ear from behind. He probably didn't know what was coming until it was too late. The forensics assume that he opened the door for his killer and led him inside.« She began quietly as she took position at the head of the slab. »Grace, however, was killed with the carving knife that was found left on the crime scene in the dining room.« She pointed at the evidence bag on her desk right next to Jim’s right hand. He picked it up and looked at the knife through the plastic. It was covered in blood to the hilt.

»Is it-?«

»Bend, yes.« Lee quickly interrupted with an exhausted little sigh. »Whoever has killed her did so with much more force than needed and even greater anger to bend the knife like this. It probably happened when the knife hit bone. She was almost decapitated by the attack.«

»This sounds … personal.«

» _Very_ personal.« Lee agreed and they exchanged a glance that told Jim cleary what she was thinking. He couldn't deny that he was thinking the same thing.

»So.« He then regained his posture as he stepped away from the desk and closer to the slab. Grace Van Dahl's blue eyes stared back at him. »Now we have two possible scenarios follow, I assume.«

»We could say that it was Oswald.« Lee nodded. »Probably with Ed’s help because he would not have been quick or strong enough to kill four people in the span of only a few minutes and stage a crime scene like this too. After all, it needed to look believable - the timeframe would have been the most important factor. Forensics claim that there are no fingerprints of either one of them around the house, no evidence that they have been involved in that crime. Their fingerprints have only been found on the front door and the threshold to the dining room. Which does not have to mean anything, after all, Edward is a forensic scientist. He would know how to eliminate all traces of his involvement.«

»That is the first possibility for this case, yes.« Jim agreed and dragged a hand over his face. It sounded plausible but everything inside of him fought against it. Oswald was his friend, just like Ed.

»But you don't believe it.«

»No … No I think I do not want to believe it. Oswald has come so far these past months. He is a reformed man, Lee. He does not harm a fly, could not even bring himself to say anything bad about Strange. Of course, that's only because of the brainwashing but, still. He would have acted out sooner.«

»So, what is our second possibility then?«

»Someone staged the crime scene knowing that Oswald would come to the house.«

»For what means?«

»Either to mess with Oswald and scare him or to make it look like he killed them.« Jim stated slowly. »No matter which motive was true, that leaves us with two more possibilities.«

»Some of his old enemies could have done this as some form of revenge that would ultimately not only cost him his last remaining family but to get him back into prison too … Or this was a warning?«

»A warning not to talk to us about Arkham, perhaps?«

Just then there was a knock at the door and seconds later Harvey shoved his head back inside. »Nygma came back with the results. It was rat poison. He also found traces of the poison in the empty decanter at the scene.«

»Rat poison.« Again Jim exchanged a glance with Lee and then Harvey who smugly grinned at them. Of course, he had talked to his partner before they had arrived at the precinct, going back and forth with their theories. Still, it was always good to discuss things with Lee too and get a different outlook on a certain scenario.

»To kill rats?« Harvey smirked.

»Harvey, I think we have to invite Professor Strange back to the GCPD for further questioning, don't you?« His partner’s grin only widened at that. Jim was not the only one who had been dying for the opportunity to get their hands on that bastard again after everything they now knew.

»On it, Brother.« Leave it to Harvey Bullock to go after some sleazy bastard when he felt personally invested in a case. To Jim, it was still quite the miracle that Oswald had even achieved to make Harvey care about him in such short a time. Then again, Harvey was just one big scruffy teddy bear, wasn’t he? He had a crushing weakness for people that provoked his protective instincts and Oswald had done just that undoubtedly throughout those past weeks.

»He will dismiss your claims.« Lee stated matter of factly and Jim found himself shrugging.

»I’m counting on it.« He replied with a smirk. »Oswald promised me that he would speak to Barnes about his time in Arkham. Apparently, this attack on his family was what it took for him to finally have enough. I shouldn't be happy about it, but as long as we can get this bastard behind bars … Though I admit that it would be better to have someone who has at least seen him or heard him plan that. We can probably assume that he has not killed the Van Dahls and their butler himself. He will have a waterproof alibi.«

»So you need to find the killer so that the killer might lead you to Strange.«

Which was easier said than done, of course, and they both knew it. Finding that killer would be possibly even harder than finding out who truly was behind the Wayne murders. »The killer will probably not walk straight into the precinct and tell us what we want to hear, though.«

»Good thing you’re a detective then, huh?« Lee smirked and pressed a kiss to his cheek. After all, they were behind closed doors now.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham City**

»I still remember the first time I came into this bar.« Butch’s face turned to him in what could only be described as annoyance over his glass of beer even before Oswald sat down next to him. The recognition that dawned on Butch’s face was almost immediate and with this he proved himself much sharper than Bullock and Gordon together in just a matter of seconds.

»I was seventeen.« He continued reminiscing of the good old days. Though, now that he came to think about it, nothing about that time had been good. »Seventeen and absolutely desperate. Mother had just lost her last job after that god awful accident that scalded her arms and took her out of commission for too long and I just finished school but no one wanted to employ me. I remember that I tried everything, even worked in a cleaning service for a short while. I wanted desperately to give my mother the rest she deserved after such a long time of exhausting labor and hardships. When I met him, my father asked me if she had a happy life. Sadly, I had to tell him that this hadn't been the case, you know? Her life wasn't happy but it was a good life anyway. She had it tough in this city with a small boy to protect. She didn't always succeed in protecting me, of course. Maybe that is why she was so eager to protect me even fiercer after what happened when I was a child. She dug her claws into me and never let go. She was a lioness and I was her cub. So, naturally, I wanted to repay her for her love and devotion and every sacrifice she made for me.«

»If you are here to kill me for your mother's death now, I-«

»Kill you? Oh no, no, no, no, Butch. You are my friend! Why would I kill you? Of course … Had you not betrayed me and fell into Tabitha Galavan’s trap, my mother would still be alive because that nasty woman would not have stabbed her, a completely innocent elderly lady who never wronged anyone in her life, in the back.« He smiled as he ordered a glass of whiskey for himself.

He pulled of his purple gloves carefully and placed them on the counter, mindful of the questionable wet stains on the olive wood as he did. »But« And he put special emphasize on that word as he turned to look at Buch again with one raised hand. »I can't act as if I had been completely without fault at this situation either, Butch. Had I not cut off your hand or forced you under my control in the first place, maybe things had turned out differently then. Although I have to remind you that I did not have a hand in your conditioning and that I was not complicit in any way in regards to that either. Please remember that this was a surprise of Don Falcone’s. But what's in the past is in the past.«

»I am sorry about your mother, Oswald.« Butch replied. »I didn't know that she would kill her. I should have known. But I didn't. And for that I am sorry.«

He bit down a comment to this and instead grabbed the glass that had been put in front of him to raise it shortly at Butch and gulp down on his drink. »Anyway. I am not here to talk about that unfortunate event that send me over the edge and landed me in Arkham.« He continued maybe a little too chipper for Butch’s taste.

»I am here to talk about the day I met you, Butch. You never asked why I wanted to become part of all of this. I think you should know. I did it all for my mother, to make her proud. Simple as that. It is true that I always had a taste for the darker things in life, but my main goal has always been to make her proud and to become someone in this city as she had always wished I would. I tried to get involved with the mob, but none of them had interest in hiring a scrawny teenager. I was no brute, I was not good when it came to fighting. All I had was my silver tongue and my wits. But I heard about Fish Mooney and that she liked to hire people with my talents, people that are a bit odd maybe. And so I found you, here in this bar. Remember?«

»I do.« Butch sighed like someone who regretted ever getting up in the morning. »I do remember you floundering into this bar in a suit that didn't quite fit you with an ego you had not yet grown into. You thought you were the cleverest person in the room and your mother has build you up so that you would believe to be a prince. We were all beneath you.«

»That is true.« Oswald replied with a small smirk. »And when you send me away and told me to come back when I would be at least eighteen I was absolutely mortified.« Oswald added with a low chuckle. »I couldn't understand how you wouldn't see my genius. And I was back to square one. I had no job, my mother had no job and we couldn't pay our rent, let alone eat. I had to act. so I did what desperate people do in times of need and sold what I had and that was me.« One of the darkest periods of his life for certain but one that made him stronger without any doubt. »I did this for a few months and showered my mother with gifts and flowers, told her that I got hired at a nightclub. And then came the day some pimp approached me and made it pretty clear to me that freelancers are not welcome in the theater district and that Fish would not like it to have common whores crowding her district.«

»Oswald-«

»I didn't listen, of course. I was so full of myself. I told him to shove it. If I was going to sell myself to anyone who would pay for a scrawny thing like me, I was not willing to give any of that money to some random pimp.« He smirked. »Turned out that was a mistake, huh? But that's where you come into the equation again - my hero! It were you and Fish who found me, remember? Between the dumpsters in some rotten alleyway next to the club, left for dead after that man beat me to a bloody pulp and showed me my place. It was you and Fish who showed me mercy for the first time, kindness and compassion even. You took me in, gave me a place to stay until my wounds would be healed so that my mother would not learn the truth. And it was you who told Fish about me and my talents. It was you who convinced her to give me a job.«

»Had I known what would become of you … Had I known you would one day kill her…«

»You would still have helped me, Butch.« Oswald shrugged. »Because that is who you are. You help people. You are a criminal, sure, a killer even. Yet, you are no monster. This is was differentiates you from the Theo Galavans, the Hugo Stranges and the Oswald Cobblepots of this world. You saw me at my weakest and you did not crush me with your boot. Instead you helped to build me up and for that I will always be indebted to you. And when I came back from Arkham, again you showed me that same kind of mercy.«

»Oswald what is this all about?« He sounded exhausted just thinking about all of this, exhausted just listening to this. Their shared past was undeniable just as the bond that they had once shared during Fish’s reign. Maybe they had never been friends, strictly speaking, but at least he had been able to trust Butch back in those days. It was as he had told Butch. This brute had seen him at his weakest and he could have taken advantage of him when Oswald had been lying in that guest bedroom in Fish’s house, unable to speak, unable to fight back, unable to scream or vent for himself in anyway. He hadn't done anything, though. He had come to him and fed him soup, for Christ sake.

»This is me saying ‘Thank you, Butch’. This is me saying ‘I'm sorry’. And this is me offering you the same you have given me countless of times before: a helping hand. Rumor has it that Tabby returned to Barbara’s lair and her bed, that she left you hanging without a care in the world and no crew to go back to.«

»That's not completely-«

»And I offer you to join me once more. This time out of your own free will. With your help, I will be able to take back my throne. And I promise you: this time I will not cut off any of your other body parts.« It was quite the leap of faith for Oswald and Ed had advised against it, urged him to be more careful. It was true that he understood Ed’s concern, after all, in the past few weeks, since he came out of Arkham, everything that had kept Butch from murdering him was the state of mind he had been in after Strange’s brainwashing and torture. Now that Butch knew that he was his old self again, there was really nothing that should be holding him back.

»I would appreciate that.« Butch huffed and Oswald was almost certain that he saw the hint of a small grin creeping up on him.

»So is this a yes?«

»This is a: I am going to regret this.«

»Works for me.« Oswald grinned and, after the barkeeper refilled his glass, he raised it to his friend once more and Butch, after hesitating for a second, gently clinked his beer glass with his. »So, I take it you know a guy who actually likes being in prison?«

 

**-End of Chapter 13-**


	14. Chapter 14

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

Sometimes when it came to solving a case, they were depending on luck. Sure, Jim had given up on the hope for luck a long time ago. This was Gotham, after all. There was no such thing as luck in Gotham, especially not for police officers. It had taken him a while to understand that after he had come to this city and this precinct as a fresh-faced rookie detective coming straight from the academy to this unruly city with all its intricate net of relationships among the big crime families and the thick wall of corruption within the justice system.

He had needed quite a few hits and being nudged down a little every now and again to fully get this. Sometimes, he even found himself wondering if he and Barbara would have worked out, in the end, had he just accepted all of this sooner and learned to roll with it like so many others before him. Then again, there was no way that he would have done that and he was glad that he hadn't.

And yet, for some odd reason, that should probably make him more suspicious, they made a breakthrough in the Van Dahl murders just by sheer coincidence as Lady Luck just so happened to knock at the door to the precinct. In the wee hours of the night, a young man had found himself in a traffic control drunk out of his mind and had confessed to the murders straight away as if he had almost waited to find anyone who would be willing to hear his confession and get him behind bars straight away for it.  

The young Irish man, one John O’Leary, had spent the rest of the night in the drunk tank of the precinct and as none other than Jim Gordon had interrogated the young man in the morning, he had once again confessed to the murders and colored the entire precinct, as it seemed, speechless. Surely, everyone had been certain that the young man would retract his confession as soon as he would have sobered up enough to fully grasp the weight of his statements. Yet, that was not what happened. In fact, he had even bragged about how he had done it, telling them details only the true killer could have known.  

»This just isn't right.« Jim frowned at his partner as they sat at their desks face to face, the bullpen beneath their balcony a buzzing beehive with officers and detectives running around like headless chicken and the constant ringing of someone's phone just a reminder of the chaos out there in the streets.

Harvey, however, had been too preoccupied with reading a file to actually look at him. Now, as he raised his gaze to look at Jim through his reading glasses, he seemed tired out of his mind. Hell, the old hound had probably spent the rest of last night by some lonely woman again. It wouldn't surprise him much. »I mean why would he confess to the crimes so willingly? We had no indication that he could be our guy! There’s no proof! No fingerprints at the crime scene that wouldn't have been from the victims or Oswald and Ed!«

»Jim« Oh, he knew that tone of voice. He sounded exhausted just saying his name. »Can't you just, for once, be happy that we solved a crime? Why does it always have to be something more? Why can't you, for once, just accept that this was the crime of some lunatic working for Strange and let it be? We found out guy and with his help we’ll get Strange.«

»Not when it gets someone behind bars who wasn’t the culprit!«

»Listen, Jim, I know that kind, right? Here« He shoved the file he had been reading over to Jim and he picked it up with a frown, staring at the counterfeit of the man who currently resided in their holding cell. »John O’Leary. The youngest of ten children, out of a long line of criminals. Twenty-one years old. Spent most of his life since the age of thirteen either in reformatories or prison.«

»So? Does not mean we have our killer, Harv.« Jim sighed. »He wouldn't have had a reason to kill the Van Dahls.«

»I agree.« Harvey snorted. »He wouldn't have and he wouldn't have needed one. Listen, Jim, there are people who don't want to be saved. If I wanted to have someone killed and not have them be traced back to me, I would ask some random criminal who is just begging to go back behind bars and for a long time too. Kids like Johnny over there … They don't function in society. They don't get it. All he knows is the life behind bars in some form or another. That's where he feels at home, that's where he feels safe and knows his way around.«

»So what you're implying is that Strange somehow got his hands on him and told him what to do.«

»He told us how he did it, Jim. There is no report about this yet. No one knows about the murders except the police and the witnesses. He would have needed insider information to lie to us like this. Either someone who was at the scene told him or he was the killer. He knew things only the killer could know. Plus« Harvey’s voice lifted one octave as he reached over and pointed at the bottom of the page. »He spent three months in Arkham under personal supervision of none other than Professor Hugo Strange last year after he left Blackgate because of his violent personality which Strange attempted to heal - like he tried to heal Oswald, I’m assuming.«

It was still odd to hear Harvey actually say Oswald’s name and not call him Penguin or just Cobblepot. »I’m not sold.«

»You never are. This is a good thing, Jim! We only have to get him to sell Strange to us.« Which was probably easier said than done! At least that was what Jim thought at the moment. Still, with a sigh, he nodded. He still could not shake off the feeling that something about all of this just wasn’t right. It was too easy. But maybe Harvey was right and he could just not accept when he had won anymore. Before Gotham that had never been a problem but this city had changed him and he couldn't yet say if for better or worse. In Gotham it was always a constant battle for survival, it seemed and the good moments seemed few and far between so that Jim sometimes almost forgot how winning felt and how it felt to actually have something good for once. The same was true for his relationship and upcoming wedding with Lee. Lately, he felt as if he was only waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Still, the feeling never left him, if anything, it became worse as they questioned Johnny O’Leary again and asked him about Strange. Of course, the young man immediately gave them the answer they wanted. He didn't even try to deny it and while Harvey rejoiced, Jim was frustrated.

»He doesn't have a reason to deny it.« Harvey sighed later, obviously exasperated by his young rookie partner. »Jim. You heard him say it. Strange came to him, Strange gave him the job to kill the Van Dahls and make it look like it has been Oswald to get Oswald back to Arkham - maybe to finish the job and make a mindless zombie out of him who cannot tell the truth against him any longer. O’Leary does not care if _Strange_ gets what he wants as long as _he_ gets what he wants and that's being sent back to prison for those murders. You heard him say it: He even said that he was glad to get Strange in trouble for what that bastard did to him in Arkham!«

»And yet he could have just told us about Strange because he thought that's what we wanted to hear or because, as you said it yourself, he wanted revenge on Strange.« Jim sighed. He didn't know what to believe anymore. He didn't know how to feel about all of this mess.

»Why would he? No, Jim, that does not make sense. Come on, just, for once do me the favor and enjoy an easy win. Not every case have to be a battle to the death. Sometimes things just are this easy, even in Gotham. And please, Jim, don't start trying to make sense of our criminals now.«

Harvey was right, of course. He had thought that he had learned his lesson and yet he still seemed unable to let this go. »We went to have another ultrasound yesterday.« Jim turned to his partner now as he dropped the file on the table and watched how Harvey’s eyes went big in surprise. Maybe he was even a little afraid to hear that something was not right with the baby. Who knew. Good things rarely stayed good in this city. »It's going to be a boy, Harv. I am going to have a son.«

And maybe that was it. Maybe that was the reason why he was unable to let this go. He would be the father of a son and, like his own father, he wanted to instill something good in him, a sense of justice and how to do what was right - not what was comfortable.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

»I understand if that is hard for you.« Barnes could be a very understanding man but he was a man who tried to stick to the rules almost as if his life would depend on it most times. Well, at least he seemed to have forgiven Oswald for knocking him out with a vase a few months ago. »I want you to know that no one is pressuring you into this. You get all the time you need, Mr. Cobblepot.«

Of course, Oswald was wearing his best black suit, he was grieving his family, after all. His hair seemed to make people nervous though. Already at least three people had remarked on it by now. Maybe he shouldn't have styled it the way he usually would. Maybe he should have toned it down a little more and played it like … Well, like _sane-Oswald_ had and plaster it to his head instead like a choir boy. At least Barnes did not seem bothered and Lee had actually complimented him for looking _dapper_.  

He nodded with his lips pressed together tightly and his brows slightly furrowed. »Thank you, Captain Barnes. I appreciate this very much.« He mumbled. »And I am still very sorry for knocking you over the head with a vase.«

»Forget it.« Barnes snorted and brushed his worries aside with a gesture of his huge paw-like hand. »Lets just say you paid for it already more than enough.«

Being in the interrogation room of the GCPD was hardly new for Oswald, only the circumstances were different for once. This time no one tried to force a confession out of him for the murder of a maniac like Theo Galavan and this time he would not end up locked up in Arkham again. For once, it was not him they were trying to arrest and sentence for some ludicrous crime that he possibly had not even committed. He was aware that Jim and Harvey kept watch behind the large mirror at the side of the room. Still, he gave his best show of the skittish young man he had been for the last couple of weeks now as he wrung his hands on the table.

»Where do I start?« He asked and gave his damndest to sound unsure and intimidated, yes, even hesitant to testify against his good friend Hugo Strange. Until now, everything had worked according to plan. The moment Jim had called him to tell him about the murderer they had caught and his confession regarding Strange, Oswald had broken down in tears and panic so that his good friend would feel the need to go easy on him. It was always so easy to play a good man like James Gordon who so desperately wanted to believe in him and his change.

»How about you tell me about your treatment inside Arkham first?«

This was actually not all that easy and he didn't have to feign fear when thinking about his time in Arkham. It was actually harder than he would have expected but it only got worse when Barnes leaned to his right side to pick something up from the ground that Oswald had previously not even noticed. The next moment, he was presenting Oswald with the helmet that Strange had used on him and sent his entire body into a state of shock at the sight. »Maybe we could start with this thing.« He started up again and placed the helmet on the table between them. Already, Oswald could feel his heart racing like mad in terror, his lips pressing into a thin line and his teeth clinking together almost painfully hard. Looking at this thing alone caused him pain.

»He used it for the treatment.« Oswald mumbled after a while and after prying open his jaws. He could hardly tear his eyes away from the thing. Captain Barnes was either blind to what this device did to Oswald’s state of mind right in that moment, or he didn't care. Oswald, for his part felt as if buckets of sweat were running down his back at the sight. He could hear Miss Peabody’s voice taunting him, could see her face hover in front of his own like a dark cloud. »I don't know how it works. I was tied to a chair against my will and Miss Peabody would stick something in my mouth so that I wouldn't bite my tongue off. I don't remember much after that.«

»Did they use electroshocks?«

»Yes. But that was not the worst.« He found himself sighing. »The visions were the worst. The drug was worse than the pain. I don't know what it was but it made me live through my deepest fears and after those session … even thinking about violence or crime or anger caused me such immense pain that I would sometimes pass out from it.«

»And is this still the case?«

»Yes.« Oswald replied. The best liars always told the truth, after all. »I get headaches and get nauseous. I have nightmares of the treatment almost every night - Ed Nygma can probably attest to that. My screaming pulled him out of his sleep more often than not by this point.«

»A little while ago you suffered a seizure in the middle of the night and had to spent almost a week at the hospital. The doctors were of the opinion that this seizure was caused by sudden and very immense stress or terror. Do you believe that this might have been caused by the treatment?«

»Yes.« He replied in earnest as he slowly peeled his gaze from the device and looked at Barnes again, meeting the steel blue of the captain’s eyes that demanded nothing but authority, respect, and to be told the truth. He was a man of the law in every sense of the word and the exact thing that James Gordon might have turned into had he never set foot into this town. He could see why Jim respected that man so much. »But … Professor Strange is a good man, Captain Barnes. He only wanted to help me, right? He only wanted to cure me.« Saying these things made him want to vomit and yet he could not yet drop his mask. He had to play along. He had to play that docile, puppy-like creature Strange had turned him into.

»Your file states that you have been sexually assaulted by some of the staff during your stay at Arkham.« Barnes continued as calm as he possibly could with such a topic but the steel in his eyes had melted a little at those words. He was clearly uncomfortable asking him these question but would not shy away from it either while making it as comfortable for Oswald as he possibly could. That was something Oswald could appreciate and respect. In a different world, where he was not a criminal monster, he might have been a fan of this man. »What can you tell me about that?«

»Nothing.« Oswald shrugged and even that was not a complete lie. »I know … I know that it's true. I know that it happened, but I can't remember any of it. I think it happened at night, in my nightmares that's how it happened, at least. I think it happened inside my room. But I was drugged out of my mind all the time that I spent there and got strong sedatives for the nights so that I would sleep and not hurt myself. I don't remember. I don't know who it was or how many. I remember waking up in pain numerous times, though. I remember waking up bleeding.«

The kiss Edward stole from his lips the moment that Oswald stepped out of the interrogation room was softer and gentler than he had ever been kissed before by this man. He was still uncertain how to feel about him and Ed, but when Ed just cupped his face as if he was the most precious thing in the world to him and kissed him in front of his coworkers and everyone who would happen to see it, maybe it melted his heart just a little more. However, this was part of their little charade and they both knew it. This was Edward, the anxious boyfriend comforting his lover after a very difficult testimony. It was all a show and the people around them seemed eager to buy into their show.

»I feel loopy.« Oswald turned to Ed after they broke apart again and Edward nodded quickly to lead him away from Barnes and the others, away from prying and sympathetic eyes. Jim and Harvey had heard everything that had been said inside the interrogation room and Oswald made a point of avoiding their eyes as he nodded his thanks to both men.

If there was anything he had learned from his other self these past couple of weeks it was that most people at this place had a very strong protective instinct over almost anyone who seemed helpless and it was all too easy to prey on this instinct as he wiped away tears from his face in a way he was sure they would notice but looked as if he didn't want anyone to notice while he leaned heavily against his boyfriend, dragging his bad leg worse than usual. Nevermind the fact that he had had time enough to sneak around and learn all those peoples weaknesses.

He knew about all their little extramarital affairs. He knew about their little deals with the local drug dealers. He knew about all the blackmailing that was going on behind closed doors. He knew about every officer's dirty little secret. To most of them, after the novelty of him being here had worn off, he had been pretty much invisible. None of them had really watched their steps around him after a little while. If anything, they had found joy in reminding him of how little they thought of him as a threat by this point.

Today, all of this came to his advantage as he and Ed were making their way past curious eyes and towards the front entrance of the precinct. Everyone knew about the case, everyone knew that he had given his testimony and he was sure that everyone had an inkling of what was written in Strange’s files about him by now. Even that he could use to his advantage would he just play out his cards the right way.

On their way out, they passed the holding cells and Oswald made a point of stopping dead in his tracks as he came face to face with Hugo Strange for the first time in weeks. He had been too cocky to refrain from fleeing the police as they came to collect him earlier this morning. This was, at least, what Jim had told him. He, as an honest man, had nothing to fear from the police, Strange had claimed. Now, however, invisible to everyone around him except Strange, Oswald smirked at the professor and for once in their twisted relationship it was not his face that was turning into a grimace of panic.

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham Harbor**

The truth was, that Oswald was not a very patient man. That came hardly as a surprise to anyone, let alone Edward or Butch. Still, even Edward had been a bit bothered by his pacing through the warehouse before Butch Gilzean and his men finally delivered what he had been waiting for. Outside the heavy doors of the warehouse down by the docks, the night hung low above Gotham harbor. Oswald was beyond agitated at this point and to no surprise either. This night was what they had been waiting for for almost a week now. This was make it or break it.

»Calm down, the plan is flawless.« Edward tried once again as he heard the screeching of tires just outside the building. Of course, the plan was flawless, after all, it was _his_ plan. He prided himself in the knowledge that while he would forever support Oswald in his endeavours, Jim Gordon would turn away with disgust from something like this. A tiny part of him even wondered if he shouldn't tell Gordon about what had went down tonight and how they had played him and the GCPD just so that Gordon would turn away from Oswald in disgust, perhaps. This would be pretty weak, though. It would be best to be the bigger man and just accept that Oswald was his and not to worry about Jim anymore … But since when was he the bigger man?

»What if they made a mistake and lead the GCPD directly to us?« Oswald snapped as he whirled around on his left heel.

»They won't, Oswald.« He urged again before he bridged the gap between them with long strides towards his boyfriend to grab his shoulders and force him to face him. »They won’t. Everything will work according to plan. Trust me. You do trust me, do you?«

»I do.« Oswald sighed and Ed quickly used the moment to steal a kiss from his lips just as the doors to the abandoned old Maroni warehouse were pushed open. Every low live criminal of this city and every mobster had stripped this warehouse of it's contest a long time ago, leaving behind nothing but a few crates, chairs and tables, chains and hooks. It was not a place either one of them enjoyed being at.

»Special delivery!« The voice of one Butch Gilzean echoed through the warehouse. There were two of Butch’s old crew trailing after the burly man as he entered the warehouse. They dragged a third man into the warehouse. He was bound at his hands and feet and had a burlap sack over his head, just like Ed had ordered. He didn't know Butch Gilzean personally, of course, but he had heard quite a bit about him - including the fact that he had betrayed Oswald before which had ended in Tabitha Galavan stabbing Oswald’s mother. He didn't know why Oswald trusted this man now but he would keep an eye on him for certain.

He kept his hands on Oswald's shoulders for a moment longer even though his eyes had wandered off to the group and their cargo. The man in their tow was limp between the gangsters but that would soon change. Once again he forced Oswald to meet his eyes as he trailed his index finger across his jaw and tilted his chin up. They didn't need many words to understand each other at this point. They only shared a small nod, invisible to others before Oswald turned to Butch and his crew with a grin as wide and wicked as if he was a kid on Christmas morning about to open his presents.

Butch’s men were quick to discharge their cargo on the chair that Ed had previously sat up not far off from the warehouse doors where they quickly tied the man to the legs and armrests of the chair before they ripped off the sack to reveal the face of Hugo Strange.

»Wonderful!« Oswald exclaimed almost giddily with a clap of his hands and flashed Butch a shark-like grin. »Wake him up, will you?«

»It's my pleasure, Boss.« Butch replied with a smirk and delivered a good hard slap to Strange’s face. His eyes flew open and panic settled into his features right away as he took in his surrounding with his beady little eyes.

»Hello, Hugo my old friend!« Oswald beamed at the man.

»Mr. Cobblepot!« Strange wheezed in horror as he came face to face with the man that he had tortured for months and had thought cured before. »What is the meaning of this?«

»Oh please, Hugo! It's _Oswald_ , remember? We’re old friends, after all.« He grinned. »I've missed our conversations! So, I thought, I would really like to have a little chat with you before you are send to Blackgate, I mean. I don't expect you to survive very long inside a prison - you know with dangerous criminals like I was before your help.«

»Mr. Cobblepot-« He quickly corrected himself as Oswald wiggled his left index finger with a small sharp _tsk-tsk_ at him. » _Oswald_ … I … We can talk about all of this, right?« He tried to regain control over the situation and control over his own panic like only a psychiatrist would in trying to talk calmly to Oswald. »Even about those accusations you put forward against me.«

»Accusations?« Oswald echoed with feigned confusion and glanced up to Ed before he looked down at the man in front of him again. »Oh, you mean that you had my stepmother and stepsiblings killed to keep me from giving testimony against you and your methods at Arkham. You mean the murders that you wanted to put on me so that I would soon be sent back to Arkham and into your loving care so that you could make a brain-dead zombie out of me and escape the fear of having me speak up against you?« Again Oswald made a point of looking at the other men in the room, Butch and his goons and then Ed. »I mean, that was quite drastic!« He added with a huff of laughter turning to the surrounding men who joined him with a nervous laughter in case of Butch’s goons.

»We all know that this is not what happened, Oswald. We can fix this, together. You would just have to tell the truth to the GCPD and then we could work on your problem again together and this time we will make it stick.«

The laugh that escaped Oswald this time was eerie even to Ed but while it certainly filled Hugo with dread, all it did for Ed was sending his blood rushing down in his groin. He wouldn't deny just how hot Oswald was when he was the real thing and not that fake persona Strange created in Arkham. He had learned to love the other Oswald as well, but that other Oswald was still there, hidden. This softer side of Oswald would never truly vanish.

»Oh, you want to help me?« He huffed with laughter. »Like you helped me last time? You know« He turned his back to Strange now to face Butch and the others while Ed never left his position slightly to Oswald’s right hand side and closer to one of the tables. From his position he felt like he could observe everything without being an actual participant. Not that he wouldn't want that, but he couldn't deny the urge to rip this man apart limb by limb for everything Oswald had by now told him about Arkham and his treatment. About how Strange had humiliated and dehumanized him and stripped him of his dignity piece by piece. Just imagining Oswald and this man in the professor’s office as this man had ordered Oswald to strip bare for him, was more than enough to make his blood boil. »When I was in Arkham, I was tortured daily.« He then explained as if none of them knew this already.

»No … No, that was therapy, Oswald. Therapy!« The professor smiled nervously.

»Ah, right.« Oswald whirled around again. »Therapy. You know? For the past couple of weeks since I got out, I didn't remember the _therapy_ even. Or what else happened at Arkham. But then I had a seizure and almost died because of your therapy and its aftereffects.« He sounded almost giddy at those words as if he had completely lost his mind. »And this device you used to administer the therapy … Remember that? It gave you the sensation that your head was being torn open so that hot lava could be poured directly into your brain. Afterwards just thinking of it would make me physically ill.«

As he turned to Ed with another grin, it was his honor to retrieve the helmet from where they had kept it hidden under a sheet on a small table just to the side.

»So, naturally I had to have it!« Oswald chuckled and took the helmet from his hands to place it on Strange’s head.

»Oswald … Oswald! No!« Strange rasped as he finally realized the true horror that was awaiting him.

»Of course, I modified it a little, to increase the effects!« Oswald grinned widely. »You see, my friend here, Ed, is really good with these sorts of things. He thought it would be nice to increase the electrical current. After all, we don't wish to have you say anything stupid in your court hearing, hm?«

»You cannot … Oswald! You cannot kill me!« He shouted in one last futile attempt of saving his own life. »If I die … Your little masquerade will be over and the GCPD will find out the truth about what you did to your family and me!«

»Oh, Hugo, my good friend…« Oswald said sweetly as he leaned in closer to Strange’s face that was now partially covered by the helmet. »I  can kill you … and I will.«

And with that he switched the device on without wasting a second thought about it. Hugo Strange’s screams tore through the warehouse and Oswald’s grin was magnificent.

The sun already rose over Gotham City and tinted the sky magenta as they dumped the body into the harbor, piece by piece. Ed found himself wondering just how many bodies were littering the ground of the harbor basin. Well, it didn't really matter and now Hugo Strange was one more body down there. They remained at the pier for a little while longer just watching the sunrise over Gotham, after Butch and his crew had cleaned up the crime scene and left.

Strange’s death had been agonizing for certain. It had been slow and painful, just the way Oswald had wanted it. It had taken endless minutes until the electricity had finally killed him after it had fried his brain.

»A part of me hoped that we would see flames bursting out from under the helmet … You know a little like in _The Green Mile_.« Oswald smirked as they watched the sunrise like they had not just killed someone, dismembered them and dumped their body into the harbor weighed down by stones. Naturally, Oswald would keep the torture device, hidden away safely in his new home, as soon as he would legally be able to move in there. It was all his now, after all.

»That's fiction, Oswald.« Ed found himself humming. Still, he couldn't deny that he might have hoped the same thing. Strange’s screams had died off quite quickly and his spasms had almost thrown the chair to the ground. And Oswald, he had enjoyed every second of it. When Strange had finally died and they had switched off the device, the entire warehouse had been filled with the smell of burned human flesh.

»Now the GCPD will be searching for Strange and the device.« Oswald hummed. »And they won't find anything. Strange escaped from his transport to Blackgate after a few of his loyal lackeys ambushed the transport and shot the drivers - which is pretty much a confession to them.«

Ed nodded. Sure, it all seemed a little too easy for comfort, but the GCPD was not quite known to be stellar in their work, except for Jim Gordon, perhaps. The rest of them were always eager to believe easy answers.

»So, the GCPD started investigating Arkham, Strange was afraid you would testify against him, after your files have been stolen by one of his staff, to ensure that you wouldn't do just that. And to scare you off in your fragile state of mind, he killed your family and had it look like you did it, after he learned that Grace visited you at the hospital and invited you for that day. He wanted you to be blamed for their murders and sent back to Arkham where he would then have been able to fry your brain completely so that you would no longer be a threat. However, compelled by the death of your family, and after the true killer came forward, you testified against Strange to Barnes himself. Furthermore, the GCPD has the testimony of the man Strange hired to kill your family. So, they took Strange in, he, of course, denied his involvement in the case. When he was escorted to Blackgate to keep him in pre-trial confinement, Strange managed to escape with the help of his goons - wherein they killed the drivers of the transport. Now he is on the loose. As for Strange’s torture device, someone has stolen it from the evidence room - probably a friend of Strange’s.«  

»What a shame.« Oswald smirked up at him and his light blue eyes glistened with mischief in the early morning light. A part of him would miss the other Oswald, the _sane_ version of Oswald but he was glad to have the real thing back at his side. »You know … I wonder if, had life treated me differently, had I not been bullied throughout my childhood, had I not been assaulted as a child by my babysitter … had I not done all this fucked up shit later in life, if I would have turned out the way Strange made me. Maybe this sane version of me, this nice version of me, is who I am at my core and how my mother saw me all my life. At least this is what I thought those past weeks, you know? And this version of me, how I am now, became more than just an armor against the bad of the world at some point.«

»We all need something to protect ourselves with, Oswald.« Ed replied with a sigh. If anyone knew this it was him. »My entire life … I felt as if there was someone inside of me. Someone stronger, someone smarter and when I killed Kristen, for once I felt as if this other me was no longer at war with me. We were one, finally, and I could accept myself for the person I am. It made me stronger. And becoming the Penguin, overcoming what you’ve been through all your life, made you stronger too.«

Silence settled in between them after this. A silence that was only disrupted by the cawing of the seagull overhead, in which they both just hung after their own thoughts for a moment. Oswald had survived unspeakable horrors and they both knew that he wouldn't just forget about them just like that. He would still be shaken awake by nightmares in the future. He would still suffer from flashbacks whenever something would remind him of the trauma he had suffered or whenever the memories would come back to him. He was strong, though, much stronger than anyone Edward knew. And all Strange had succeeded to do, in the end, was to make him even more ruthless than ever before.

This Oswald right here would no longer be bullied or betrayed. He was a force to be reckoned with and Ed was glad that he would be there to witness it all. »So … Now what?« Ed broke the silence after a while.

»I don't know.« Oswald smirked. »I guess I am taking back control, huh? This city will be mine again and I want you at my side for that, Edward.« This truly took him by surprise as he looked down to meet Oswald’s eyes.

»Is this … You mean that?« He found himself asking quietly and this time it was Oswald who reached for his face and turned it towards him with gentle fingers.

»Of course, I do.« He replied. »You were there for me through it all, Ed. Sure, you sent me away when I needed you the most but, in the end, you helped me.«

»I was jealous.« Ed smirked. »I didn't want Jim to take you in. I wanted you all to myself.«

»I know.« Oswald laughed. »And now you have me all to yourself.«

»For now.« Ed smirked as he drew him in for a kiss. »And very soon I will only have to share you with the rest of Gotham.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

»How is this even possible?« Barnes shouted and the entire precinct seemed to jolt awake all at once. His shout was like the roar of a lion echoing through the savannah. »Strange escaped and you have no clue where he is or how to find him?«

»Well, the transport was ambushed.« Bullock frowned. »That was out of our control, right? Now all we have to do is find him again.« Which was easier said than done and they all knew this. Jim listened with half an ear to Barnes’ ranting and Harvey’s excuses as he just stood there beside his partner in Barnes’ office like a schoolboy in front of the headmaster. He was too busy trying to figure out how to break these news to Oswald than to actually listen to Barnes.

Last year, he would not have wasted a second thought about that but things were different now and Oswald was his friend. He was fragile and the death of his family had taken its toll on him already. How would he react to those news? He would certainly not be glad to hear that Strange had escaped. He would be afraid for sure.

It was not much later after they had both escaped Barnes’ office, that Jim grabbed his jacket from the backrest of his chair and put it on. »Where are you going already?« Harvey groaned and looked up from the paperwork on his desk.

»I am going to pay Oswald a visit. I think he should learn what happened to Strange from me.« Jim sighed. It was Oswald’s day off and though Edward was working in the lab as usual, Jim felt compelled to go and tell Oswald everything himself. He was almost certain that Ed had already called him or written a message after he had certainly already heard the news about Strange. Ed seemed to have his eyes and ears everywhere. Still, he had promised Oswald to keep him safe after everything that he had learned about Arkham. He had promised him that Strange would no longer be a danger to him in any which way. Now Strange was on the run and Oswald was certainly terrified.

»Why bother? Nygma has probably told him already.« Harvey scoffed and rolled his eyes. Needless to say, Harvey was just as sceptical of this relationship between Edward and Oswald as everyone else who knew about it. It hadn't been exactly a secret but the way Edward had kissed Oswald the other day had been the talk of the town for almost the rest of that week. Jim too was not a fan, but as long as they were good to each other … Well, who was he to tell Oswald whom he could date or not?

»I'm his friend, Harv, and I told him Strange would not get to him again. I failed and Strange is on the loose. This maniac had Oswald’s family killed just a few days ago, he is probably terrified.« Harvey muttered something along the lines of ‘Saint James to the rescue’ as Jim left the precinct without granting him the favor of reacting to his words. He knew how this looked to Harvey and anyone else. Yes, he was too attached to Oswald Cobblepot and yet he couldn't find anything wrong with that. Not after everything he knew now, not after everything that had happened.

Oswald had been sent to Arkham for a murder that _he_ had committed and everything that he had suffered through had happened because of this. He owed him his friendship. He owed him to break the news to him personally. He made it to Nygma’s apartment within just a few minutes with his car. It was still early in the day and the traffic not as thick as usually during rush hour. It didn't take long after he had first knocked on the door that it was opened from the other side and he, to his surprise, found himself confronted with Butch Gilzean instead of Oswald.

The surprise was mutual. »Butch?« He almost choked on his name.

»Gordon?«

»Who is it Butch?« Oswald's voice sounded from inside the apartment and Butch opened the door completely to let Jim inside without further ado. Oswald was dressed sharply in one of his best suits, his hair styled in his usual bird-like fashion like he had done it before Arkham. Even in the past weeks after Arkham he had dressed properly but just not like this. Maybe it should concern him, but he found it most concerning that Butch was here with Oswald. Alone. »Jim!« Oswald exclaimed as he saw Jim. He was seated on Edward’s couch in front of the TV but got to his feet the moment Butch closed the door. »What brings you here?« He seemed not at all bothered by Butch’s presence.

»I … I came here to tell you about Strange.«

»He escaped, I know.« Oswald mumbled and cast his eyes down to look at his feet before he nervously started nibbling on his cuticles the way Jim had seen him do numerous times during the past few weeks. »That's why … That’s…«

»That's why I’m here.« Butch concluded with an almost friendly smile on his face. Jim could almost believe that smile too had it not been Butch Gilzean who had once had held Barbara hostage and thus started the downfall of their relationship.

»I wasn't aware you two were involved with each other again.« Was this good? Oswald should stay as far away from this crowd as possible.

»I … When I heard about Strange this morning from Ed … I called Butch because I was afraid that Strange might come for me. I didn't want to be alone. And I’m concerned for Ed … I mean Strange had my family killed, I’m worried he might target Edward next … Surely, he has to know how we feel for each other.« He sounded intimidated looked just as skittish as he had when Jim had collected him from Arkham.

Jim drove a hand over his face. »I’m sorry Oswald. I wanted to tell you myself.« He sighed. »I promised you we would get him behind bars and now he is escaped.«

»You can still catch him.« Oswald replied quietly but the fear and anxiety was all too visible on his face despite the shaky smile he tried to mask it with. »You can still keep your promise. I trust you, Jim. I trust that you’ll find him. But until then … I think I want to keep Butch close.«

»I understand.« Jim replied and laid a reassuring hand on Oswald's shoulder. He didn't like that Butch was here. He didn't like that Oswald associated with Butch again now after everything but as long as he felt a little safer this way, he could accept it. Butch was possibly not the worst of the worse. He gave Oswald's shoulder a firm squeeze. »Okay, I’m going back now before Harvey loses his shit. I promise you that we find Strange. He will never do anything to you ever again.«

This time, Oswald even managed a small smile as he looked up at Jim. »I know, Jim. If anyone will be able to catch him, it's you.«

 

**-End of Chapter 14-**


	15. Epilog

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your support <3

**Gotham - Van Dahl Mansion**

He really didn't like coming empty-handed to Oswald, not after everything he had been through these past months ever since he had first been admitted to the Arkham Asylum. Yet, there was nothing he could do about it, as he finally arrived at the mansion. The old Van Dahl Mansion was a relic from the Victorian era by the looks of it, maybe even as old as Gotham itself and towered a bit over the surrounding area on a small hill as a silent witness to the centuries. They, the GCPD, had still no clue where Strange had gone even weeks after the man had escaped their custody, no traces of him until now and no hope to change anything about that in the near future. Strange was gone just like his device and his goons.

By now it was clear to anyone that they would not manage to find Strange in time for the trial and so it would not be Strange who would be on trial for the mistreatment of the patients, but the new director and the management of the asylum. Jim could only hope that the files that they had produced from Strange’s office by now would suffice to get at least some semblance of justice for Oswald and the other victims of Strange.

Now that Jim was here, however, his heart felt heavy. Harvey told him that there were more important things to take care of now, like the aftermath of the Arkham riot that led to the escape of quite a few patients and other things that escaped the secret laboratory of Strange beneath Indian Hill, but Jim had been adamant to come here and tell Oswald what the situation was. Oswald deserved to learn the truth from him, just like last time.

His knock at the front door fell on deaf ears. Even the ringing of the doorbell was met with no answer from the inside of the old house that was creaking in the gush of wind that ruffles the trees of the surrounding forest.  

Oswald had only recently moved into the old Van Dahl mansion and only after Jim had urged him to do it. He hadn't felt comfortable with the idea to move into the house where his family had been killed, afraid even. Not only because of the memories of that awful night, though. He had been afraid what people might think of him when they would learn that he had moved into the house so shortly after those tragic and absolutely horrifying deaths. Jim and Oswald had talked a lot about it, actually. Oswald didn't wish to appear as a leech or an arriviste. It had taken a lot of effort on Jim and Edward’s part to get Oswald to agree to move into the house. It was his now, after all, and it was not his fault that his family, first his father and then his step-family, had died in this house. None of it was.

He tried the doorknob as he didn't get a response from inside the house and so, after a while, he walked around the house. Oswald’s car was parked in the driveway and Edward was still at the precinct, so Oswald was certainly home. Maybe he would gain access through the back door. The house seemed quiet as he walked around it and glanced through the windows every now and again. Odd. Oswald was rarely alone these days and most of the times Butch was with him when Edward was at work. He was plagued by nightmares and the ghosts that his paranoia conjured up, as Edward had told him a short while ago in concern about his lover.

This had to have been expected, Jim thought. Oswald was afraid. Who wouldn't be? It was only natural and Edward couldn't be around Oswald 24/7.

He reached the back door that led into the kitchen and gave another sharp knock but there was still no answer. This door was locked too and Jim started to feel a little uneasy as he tried to look through the glass window in the wooden door. He could only hope that nothing had happened to the new owner of the house and tried to shake off the images that his sleep-deprived brain started to conjure up without his agreement. Still, what if Oswald was lying in a puddle of his own blood somewhere inside the house because Strange or one of his former foes had found and attacked him?

With a sigh, Jim turned around and it was only then that his eyes caught a glimpse of the old greenhouse where they had found the bodies of the Van Dahls behind an old willow tree and surrounded by bushes that had overgrown so much that they almost swallowed the old greenhouse. It was a shame that no one had taken care of the building in at least the last decade. Then again, Oswald had once told him that his father had been quite sick so, naturally, he had probably not been in the proper state to take care of the greenhouse or he hadn't deemed it important enough. There was something very odd about this entire place as if it was buzzing with something that Jim could not quite put his finger on. He still saw the crime scene before him, maybe that was it. Maybe it was the ghost of the crimes that had taken place here on these grounds that were still haunting the very soil the mansion was built upon. Jim Gordon never believed in ghosts, unlike Oswald, as the former gangster had once admitted to him in a hushed voice over a glass of wine in front of his fireplace, but if there was one place on this earth that could be haunted it was certainly this mansion.

To his surprise, as he approached he noticed that the door to the greenhouse was wide open.

 _Is he in there?_ He asked himself as he slowly walked up to the greenhouse. Well, the greenhouse was part of his property so why wouldn't he go there and yet it was the place his family had been killed in. Surely, after how afraid he was to move into this house, he would not be at ease visiting the greenhouse. Maybe this was a step in the right direction, though. He was trying to overcome his trauma and regain control over his life, maybe even planning on renovating this building. Jim couldn't help but shortly think about Ivy Pepper, the little girl that was friends with Selina Kyle. She would have a field day with this place.

The closer he came to the conservatory, the more and more he grew aware of the sounds coming from inside. The wind carried the sound of moaning to his ears. His first instinct was to turn back around and leave quickly, though. It was not on him to see how Oswald was cheating on his boyfriend - and honestly, he was shocked that Oswald would even do such a thing. He wouldn't even have thought the old Oswald would be able to cheat on the man he loved. Despite how wicked the Penguin had been in the past, in his core, he had always been a sentimentalist. He was loyal to those he loved, even to people like Jim who had treated him less than kindly in the past before Arkham and even refused to help him as he had been locked away in the asylum.

However, he quickly became aware that those sounds were not coming from pleasure. There were cries of pain and the sound as if someone kicked a wet sack of potatoes repeatedly. He breached the threshold without much hesitation at this point only to stare in surprise at what he saw.

He would have expected a lot of things from his visit to the mansion, but certainly not what he got to see now as he stood in the door of the greenhouse visiting how one of Butch Gilzean’s men was beating up another of his goons with a baseball bat while Oswald just stood and watched with clear amusement playing on his face. It was then that Jim realized that he had been played.

This Oswald he got to see in these precious few seconds before Oswald noticed his presence, was the true thing. He came face to face with the Penguin once more and though, just a while ago, he had hoped for the Penguin to come back and aide them against Strange, knowing that he was himself again was strangely concerning. How long was he like this already? How long was he back to his old self already without showing it to anyone? Oh no, he knew right at that moment as their eyes met, that Edward had surely known and not told anyone. Why? His mind reeled. To protect his lover, of course. Because he wanted this version of Oswald more than he had ever wanted the submissive and timid version of Oswald. He couldn't blame Edward for keeping his mouth shut, could he? If their places were swapped, he would have done the same thing.

Still, there was this awfully nagging question that remained in his mind and demanded answering. Had they, Edward and Oswald,  played Jim and the rest of the GCPD the entire time? He didn't believe that Oswald had just faked his nice persona completely ever since Jim had witnessed that ice-cream-test of Strange. It was truly baffling how much one person could realize in just the blink of an eye. The same seemed true for Oswald as the grin on his face seemed to die in slow motion now.

»Jim!« He gasped. He could see how the panic was settling in on Oswald’s pale face. »Jim … It's not … This man broke into my house a-and-«

»How long?« His voice sounded resigned even to his own ears. He wanted to say that he was angry but he was more disappointed than that. Disappointed that his friend had betrayed him like that. At least that was how he felt right now. »How long are you … _back_ already?«

There was a moment of clear hesitation on Oswald’s face as Butch and his lackey just started in visible discomfort and agitation at Jim and Oswald. Butch seemed ready to attack if Oswald do as much as click his fingers. Oswald, however, seemed to try and think about what he wanted to do. He could almost see the little cogwheels in his brain turning and turning and turning, before he gave a deep sigh and seemed to settle for the truth at last.

»Since Strange escaped.« Oswald replied and though his words sounded honest, Jim didn't know whether he was able to believe him or not. Oswald Cobblepot, _the Penguin_ , was a masterful liar and manipulator, after all. Then again, was he that much of a liar? Maybe he idealized the former mobster thanks to their newfound friendship. Jim would certainly not brush off this possibility. However, as Oswald continued, his doubts started to die off. »You see … It came back all at once. The old me. When I heard about Strange having escaped custody and was on the loose again, I started to panic and then … It was just as if someone had switched on a lightbulb and it all came back to me. The old me, the memories of Arkham, the pain and what I’ve been through. I won’t lie, I wanted to hunt Strange down myself and rip him apart limb by limb then.«

»But you didn't.« Jim’s words sounded almost hopeful. He didn't wish to hear something else and Oswald knew this, yet he decided to still tell the truth.

»I did.« Oswald shrugged his shoulders. »I asked Butch for his help to hunt him down but … He is nowhere to be found, Jim. Believe me, no one hates that more than I.«

Jim drove a hand through his hair. He felt sick and almost as if he needed to sit down. As if Oswald knew this, he gave Butch a small wave of his hand. Butch and his lackey were quick to grab the hurt man on the ground under his armpits and drag him out of the greenhouse to give the detective and the former (and current?) criminal some privacy.

»Oswald … I have to know. Did you plan on telling me?« Jim asked with yet another resigned sigh before he sank down on one of the old stone benches of which there were three more inside the conservatory. All of them looked as if they could crumble under his weight at any second and a small spider crawled away from Jim in annoyance the moment he sat down to retreat back into hiding.

»Sure.«

»And at which point? In a few months? In a few years? As soon as you would have taken back the underworld?« The guilt-stricken expression on Oswald's face looked sincere enough and all too familiar by this point. »Or would you have waited for me to find out the hard way?«

»I…« He began and slowly sat down next to him on the old bench. This place could be beautiful with a little bit of love. »I wanted to tell you, I really did. I didn't want you to find out this way, Jim. We are friends, after all, and that is everything I always wanted from you right from the start when we first met. But when I became myself again … I realized that … I realized that you were friends with the other Oswald, the nice one, the docile Oswald who would not survive a week in this city all on his own, who needed your help and guidance and protection. And then I started to realize that you would never be willing to be my friend the way I really am. I decided … I would much rather enjoy our friendship a little while longer before I would have needed to let you slip away eventually.«

Jim sighed and clasped his shoulder. If anything, he could understand Oswald's deep desire for friendship and companionship. It was all too human and Jim had realized a long time ago that Oswald was not the monster other people wanted to see in him. He was no monster, he was just all too human. »So. I hope I will not find that guy’s body in a dumpster tonight?« Jim huffed and nodded in the general direction of the greenhouse door.

»You are not going to arrest me?« Oswald asked with one raised brow, surprise and confusion written all too clearly on his face.

»I am off-duty.« Jim scoffed and bumped his shoulder. Oh hell, how the mighty have fallen. »I am here as your friend, Oz. Just promise me that you will not kill the guy.«

Oswald gave a pained sigh but returned his shoulder bump gently. »You are not making my comeback easy, James.«

※※※※※※※

**Gotham - Gotham City Police Department**

By now, he was quite familiar with the hustle and bustle of the precinct of the Gotham Central police station and after his time as an errand boy most officers and detectives hardly paid him any attention whenever he would pay them a visit now. In their eyes, he was no longer a threat and that could only be beneficial to him now. As long as they underestimated him, they did not pay him and his businesses any attention and that could only be positive. To the entire rest of Gotham, Oswald Cobblepot was no a reformed criminal and an entrepreneur ever since this whole tragedy with his family and the coverage of the Arkham trial had informed almost everyone about the hardships that he had to endure to come this far.  

When he entered the precinct his goal was clear in his mind and that was exactly why he had none of his bodyguards trailing after him too. He did not come for business. Nobody tried to stop him as he floundered in the general direction of the laboratory as if he would still be working here. And yet, Oswald quickly became aware of the look that none other than Harvey Bullock shot him from the balcony. Oswald only paused momentarily to tip his chin in a friendly gesture.

It was Jim who had told Harvey that Oswald was back to his old self a little while ago, shortly before the Arkham trial had picked up the pace. Then again, Oswald had stopped pretending to be anything other than his normal self quickly after Jim had found out. The nice version of himself might have cared about what Harvey would think about him, but this version of him, right here, couldn't care less. When he looked at Harvey now, he just saw a man who had demeaned and abused him for years, like everyone else. It didn't matter that he had been nice to the _sane_ version of Oswald. Not in his eyes, at least.

This other version of him, this timid man he had been for a few months after Arkham, had played on Harvey’s protective nature and that was it. Bullock and he would never be friends and he knew better than anything, that the old grouch only waited for him to make a misstep so that he could throw him right back into Arkham. Yet, Oswald made a point of treating Bullock with the utmost respect whenever they would meet these days, just to annoy the detective. And even now when faced with this friendly gesture of Oswald’s, Harvey turned back to his paperwork with a disgusted curl of his lips and bit harder than strictly necessary into his donut.

Nobody tried to stop him as he made his way through the bullpen and into the side wing of the building after this. Nobody even tried to stop him as he waddled into the lab silently and locked the door behind himself. Nobody tried to stop him as he walked up to Ed’s desk and pulled the man back by his shoulder with one swift move. It was almost a bit concerning how little Edward picked up on of the world around him whenever he was engulfed in his work. They had to work on that otherwise his boyfriend would get himself killed.

»Do you realize how easy it would be for me to kill you right now?« Oswald grinned as he twirled Ed’s chair to force him to face him - or really, so that he would have it easier to climb on his lap. Ed’s face was a priceless mask of confusion and excitement right before Oswald managed to capture his mouth with his own and effectively rendered him speechless.

»You don’t hear me complain.« Ed managed to get out between two kisses. »But to what do I owe this visit of the future mayor of Gotham?«

»You’ll jinx it.« Oswald groaned against his mouth. »I did not even announce my candidacy yet.« They both knew that he would have good chances to win against Aubrey James, though, after this whole Indian Hill debacle after Strange’s alleged escape from custody. The police was certain that it was Strange who had freed his monsters, one last act of revenge against this city. Oswald knew better, of course.

Still, for now, Oswald was rather busy inciting the good people of Gotham. »Oh come on, Oz, we both know you’ll win.« Ed hummed against his lips.

»You know a part of me feels bad for Jim and the others. They helped me so much and now I am acting as if the GCPD is a bunch of incompetent losers.«

»Which they are.« Ed grinned. Of course, he was right and they both knew it. The GCPD was not able to see what was directly in front of them, except for Jim, maybe. But even he was not always as attentive as he could be. Otherwise, he would have already seen right through Oswald's ploy.

»Which they are.« Oswald agreed with a small little chuckle.

»Even your darling detective _Saint James of the House Gordon_?« Ed snickered as his long fingers found their way to Oswald’s neck.

»He is blinded by friendship, that is all.« He grinned before he stole yet another sloppy kiss from Ed’s mouth. »But I am not here to talk about Jim.« Before Ed could protest, Oswald had already opened the button on Ed’s trousers and pulled down the zipper.

»So why are you here then?«

»I hardly see you anymore.« Oswald purred against Ed’s open mouth and licked his way inside only to draw back  the second he felt Ed’s tongue brush against his own. »All we do is work. So, I figured I would come to see you where you can’t run from me.«

»As if I would ever do this.« Ed’s words were torn from his lips with a soft moan as Oswald sneaked his right hand down the waistband of his trousers and then his boxer shorts. With excitement he realized that his boyfriend was already half hard. »I would never run from you, silly Bird.«

»Glad to hear this.« Oswald grinned and did his best to appear graceful as he slid down his legs again, despite his twisted ankle.

»Oz, what are you-« But he was interrupted by yet another deep moan the second Oswald had settled between his legs, pulled his lover’s erection from his pants and closed his lips without much finesse around the burning hot flesh. It was certainly not the first time that he did something like this and yet he felt just as nervous as if it would be his first time. He was certainly not known for his patience and that showed now as he took Ed as deeply as he dared without choking.

As he glanced up at Edward now through his long lashes he enjoyed seeing how he pressed his hand to his mouth to stifle his moans as to not attract any suspicion. He was heavy on his tongue as he took him so deep that the head of his dock hit the back of his throat before he finally let go of his lover again.

He leaned up though, shoving Ed’s shirt up to kiss his lover’s stomach now instead, his hands running along the insides of his thighs before he went back to peppering kisses down his length and ran his tongue along the underside of it.

Before he knew it, he could feel Ed’s long fingers comb through his hair and messing up his hairdo. He would forgive him this time. He tried his best to relax his jaw, keeping his teeth back and moved his head up to draw Ed’s cock into his mouth. He could feel him brush the back of his throat once more and breathed slowly through his nose, closing his eyes in concentration.

There was no force behind it, as Ed rested his hand on the back of his head, just a silent yearning for contact. Yet, he could feel how much restraint it took his lover not to thrust into his mouth. Not that he would mind the idea, though. Oswald looked up through his lashes, staring at Edward as his lover leaned his head back in a deep moan. His own hands slid to Ed’s hips, urging them on carefully. He swirled his tongue over the tip of Ed’s cock, his eyes widening as the sudden drops of precome sliding down his tongue and he lazed it along the underside of his lengths, unable to hold back the eager, hungry groan of approval.

Oswald smirked up at his lover shortly as he wiped away a bit of spit from his jaw before he closed his mouth around him once again causing Ed to accidentally buck his hips. »Don't stop!« Ed bit out and although he really would want to torture his lover, he felt his body ache in interest at Ed’s thrust. Slowly, Oswald rested his head back in Edward’s grip, his own hands dropping from his hips.  

Edward was quick to get what Oswald wanted from him as the young mobster left the motions of his hips completely to Ed’s own control. He rolled his hips repeatedly and almost sobbed on the choked moan that tore from his throat as he could watch how his cock glided in and out of Oswald’s mouth, the visualisation tied in with the sensation pulling him that much closer towards his release clearly. Before any of them could do anything about it, Ed had stuffed himself all the way in, his hand on Oswald's head keeping him there as he came.

»Oh God … I’m sorry…« Ed muttered but Oswald, for his part, was all too eager to make a show of it how he swallowed his load after he had allowed Ed to slip out of his greedy mouth the moment he knew that not a single drop would be wasted. Ed’s amber eyes were burning into his own as he watched him with his mouth hanging open almost a little stupidly.

»That's for not coming home to me last night.« Oswald smirked as he tucked his lover’s cock back into his boxer shorts and pants to leave no trace of their activities.

»This hardly felt like a punishment.« Ed huffed and pulled him back onto his lap the moment Oswald had raised to his feet. He had no other choice but to slip right back into his previously assumed position, his knees digging into the worn out cushion of Ed’s office chair.

»Had you come home to me last night … I would have allowed you to bend me over that pesky desk of yours and fuck me senseless.« He allowed himself to drag his tongue over Ed’s closed mouth but as soon as he opened it to play, he withdrew once more. He had always enjoyed torturing people but he almost enjoyed this form of torture even more. »I would have allowed you to do everything to me you always wanted to do and the entire precinct would have known.« He could sense how alluring that image was in Ed’s head, having none other than the former - and future - king of Gotham stagger out of his lab after he had had his fun with him with everyone around knowing what just happened between them. »But since you didn't come home, you didn't deserve this.«

»You are the devil.« Ed hummed with a grin.

»Yes, I am.« He chuckled and did not bit back on the glee he felt at those words. everything went according to plan lately and that was something he could greatly enjoy. They had freed those monsters underneath Indian Hill together with some of the more dangerous patients and the public was revolting against the police and their lack of success when it came to finding those monsters and keeping the public safe. »Good thing that you will become my chief of staff as soon as I am mayor, huh? It needs a devil to keep a devil in check.«

They hadn't talked about it yet. It had been clear that Edward would help him in his quest of becoming mayor of Gotham City after everything they had been through together but he had never outright told his boyfriend that he planned on making him his chief of state. He had told Butch and though the burly man was not always such a big fan of Ed, he had agreed on that decision. Maybe he had hoped at first to become Oswald's right hand man in this regard, but even Butch Gilzean had realized that his talents were better suited for other things.

This news took Ed so much by surprise that his mouth just fell open again. He needed a moment to realize his words before a huge smile was splitting his stupidly handsome face in two. »Are you … Is this … Are you serious?«

»Have I ever tricked you?« He smirked. The following kiss almost threw him off Ed’s lap and the chair, but Ed was luckily quick enough to wrap his arms around his back and pull his so close against his own body that Oswald almost lost the ability to breathe altogether. It was a nice sensation though. It was almost suffocating the way Edward held him in his grip and forced this all too hungry kiss from him, but he wouldn't miss it for anything in the world.

It wasn't much later that Oswald finally rose from his lover’s lap and straightened out his clothes. He was certain that he looked properly disheveled at this point. Soon he would make his campaign public and he dreaded many things about that campaign, for the most part going against the GCPD and telling the world just how incompetent they had been in the past in their hunt for Strange and the monsters that Strange had created. However, knowing that Ed would be by his side all the way through it put his mind at least a little bit on ease again.

He was already half out the door as he turned to face Ed again. »You do know I love you, right?« He smirked. »You can stop putting laxatives into Jim’s coffee now, you jealous idiot.«

 

**-End of Chapter 15-**

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to tell me what you think down in the comments, that helps a lot <3


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